I am feeling both relieved and yet still hurt and upset and very angry.

DH has finally stopped making excuses and turning a blind eye to his son's behavior. After much debating with me and now finally getting tired of SS18's behavior, DH tells me he doesn't think I should do anything for his son anymore. He acknowledges that I have done a lot for his son and he doesn't blame me for not wanting to have any kind of relationship or do anything with/for him anymore.

SS18 moved in a year ago, after finally getting tired of BM's abuse and neglect. DH bought him a car, braces, clothes. We treated him with respect, made ourselves available to spend time with him. I have spent my own money buying him gifts and doing things for him, of my own choice. I used to cook him dinner, bake him cookies. (No, we aren't perfect but we have really tried to do the right things for him.)

After my dinners were repeatedly thrown into the trash, I never received a thank you for the cookies, he wouldn't even look at me or talk to me when he came into the house, glared at me if he did look at me... complained to DH that I don't pay for as much in our household as DH does and that's one of the reasons he doesn't respect me.

I taught this kid to do his own laundry, insisted that he clean up after himself. Caught him skipping school and made sure DH got him back on track. I called him out on his disrespect toward me and even toward DH and won't allow him to get away with so much as a dirty look toward me anymore.

He's been laying around all summer. Calling in to work when he doesn't feel like working, sleeping all day, partying at night.

We have put a stop to all this. Absolutely no more laying around and his summer is officially going to be crap from now on, not the huge party he planned it to be. I intend to make life uncomfortable for this kid from now on - no more being "nice" and making it easy for him to just take advantage of us.

I've had enough and I've made it absolutely clear to DH that he gets his act together NOW, or he will have to get out. There is no other way and from this point on I won't tolerate any more of SS18's games. I am shocked and amazed that DH actually agreed with me, agreed that his son will have to straighten up or he will have to leave. He cannot lay our house around anymore.

So now that DH is putting the pressure on SS18, the kid is out having lunch with BM today when he hasn't seen her in weeks. He will come home later bragging to DH and me about how wonderful it was to be with his mom... I have made it clear to DH that if he gives me any more grief I will send him straight to his mom's house. Problem for SS18 is, BM does things like run around the neighborhood naked or try to set her house on fire. She kicks her son and calls the police on him when she's angry at him. DH hasn't wanted to send SS18 back there but I sure as heck will at this point.

I guess I am the evil stepmonster. :O

I truly want nothing to do with SS18 anymore. I don't cook, I don't spend money on him (not even for special occasions anymore). I don't try to make conversation with him and take interest in his life anymore. Nothing. I feel terrible saying this because I do care that he has a good relationship with DH and I truly have wanted the best for him... I don't regret that I tried to do the best I could for him, but I want him out of my house now. This is the only place I confess my real feelings. This has been building up... six years of being disrespected and badly treated by SS18 and now my stomach turns just looking at him.