Back in March my fiance filed to modify the shared parenting arrangement he has with his ex wife. We have been together for 3 years, and his kid is 8 years old now. She still pees her pants, has a UTI constantly, poops herself, lies, had lice for over 6months, steals, and has had more tardies and absences I have ever seen a child have at school, and tells her little friends that she has slept naked with a boy like boyfriend and girlfriend do. I caught her literally molesting my child who is also a girl when my daughter was 3 and she was 6. I called social services anonomously, because the childs mother is psycho and very violent and didn't want to be attacked. NOTHING HAPPENED!!! Children services never even called her mom. Last October, the mothers dog viciously attacked my fiance's daughter, and she had to recieve several stiches on her mouth, nose, and forehead. Yet the mother REFUSES to get rid of the dog. I called children services again and the mom never recieved a visit. The dog warden also filed a report with social serices because another child was attacked by the same dog a year before, but CS failed this little girl, big time.
The child told us that she lost recess privledges in first grade. My fiance and I went in to have a conference and found out that his daughter held another girl down and cut her hair with scissors, and her mother told the school it was because the father left the them for another woman and the child had a hard time adjusting! They had already been divorced for 6 years! The child was less than 6 months old when they split so I doubt she would even remember her parents together! The teacher then told us that the child pees her pants nearly every day at school and they are always unsuccessful in contacting her mother to bring her clean clothes so we had the school start calling ME when she needed clean clothes. But the reason she lost recess was due to all of her tardies to school. We were then informed that the childs school fees had not been paid, they were only $15 so it was not a big deal. We also paid them for second grade last year. In second grade, her mother never gave her lunch money so she had to charge school lunches. It came to a point where the school refused to let her charge anymore and they only gave her peanut butter sandwiches and milk to eat. This went on for weeks before the child finally told us. On top of all these things, she dresses like an 8 year old tramp. Mini skirts, big hoop earrings, belly shirts, and heels, all are worn to school. I told her school that I was dissapointed in them that they didn't contact social services about any of the childs issues, many of which were hidden from my fiance.
The child is now out of the country with her mother. She told my fiance once about the trip, and that it was for a month, but left no phone number, address, or email so we could keep in contact with the child. It has been 3 weeks since we have seen her. The mother motioned for a guardian ad litem, which is rediculously expensive. The magistrate granted it, and we have to pay a $750 deposit for it by 9/9/09. That's more than our mortgage. Our attorney said he would tell the judge that it was unfair, but he didn't care obviously. I know for a fact that the child will be completely brainwashed by her mother by the time she gets back. More than a month with no contact with anyone from our family is just wrong.How is that even fair?? Of course it will be akward until we get her back into routine. That will be hard though because when he calls to get his daughter the mother never answers or calls back. Before he motioned for full custody we had the kid all the time. Now we are lucky to get her once a month. it is so obvious what her mother is doing!
To make matters worse, the mother called the father of my daughter to dig up "dirt" on me. He is not active in my childs life at all, and wants to let my fiance adopt her. My fiance's ex calls my ex and says oh don't do that. don't let anyone adopt your kid. Like it's ANY of her business!
And my fiance's daughter is playing both sides very well. My fiance spent over $1000 on her for her birthday, and does whatever she wants when she does come. He bought her a $700 water slide and she said you could have got me the bigger one!! when she opened up her presents she said I wonder what I will get at my moms house. How nice. Her mother got her a cell phone and calls her way past 11 pm when she spends the night here.
I can't take the games that are being played. The kid's mother will call or text my fiance when she knows I am not around and says I need to talk to you and when he calls her back she never has anything to say. I know she is just trying to cause problems but believe you me it does. I feel like I am losing my mind!
I will end with this: we went for custody based on the child's well being, and the mother's criminal record. She has 2 warrants for unserved jail time for 2 DUI's. She was as recently arrested July 3 for drug possesion, and disorderly conduct. She has another warrant in another town for a DUI, and 2 more warrants in another town for drug trafficking.At least 5 warrants total that we know about.I can't believe she boarded a plane out of the country, and I really believe our attorney isn't doing more for us. There are so many more things, I could go on and on. Is there even hope for us getting the child? Or are we just wasting time?