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Access agreement BF3 wants to put to BM ( What do you think?)

Zimka's picture

Have we missed anything??????

Proposed Access
From 20 June till SS second birthday
Saturday 20 June 2009 – Saturday 11 July 2009
4pm Saturday till 12pm Sunday, weekly
Saturday 18 July 2009 – Saturday 15 August
4pm Saturday till 2pm Sunday, weekly
Saturday 22nd August 2009 - till Birthday
4pm Saturday till 4pm Sunday, weekly

Reasons for this:
•SS has already spent the night in my home. One whole overnight and the 4:30am drop off when you feared for siblings safety from BF2.
•A gradually time adjustment over the next two months to allow SS to adjust to the new agreement.

SS second birthday till third birthday
4pm Saturday till 4pm Sunday, weekly
Also a mid week access
Suggestion Wednesday 4pm till Wednesday 7pm
2 x One week holidays per year. Date’s to be negotiated and agreed on by SS birthday each year.

SS's 3rd birthday till 5th Birthday
Friday night 4pm - Sunday 4pm every second weekend
Sunday 8 – 4pm every other weekend
Also a mid week overnight
Suggestion Wednesday 4pm till Thursday morning (time to be negotiable to BM's timetable for pick from my home)
2 x One week holidays per year. Date’s to be negotiated and agreed on by SS birthday each year.
Notes to be discussed:

Any time BM is unable to personally provide day to day care of SS for more than 24hrs. SS will come and stay with BF3 till BM is able to resume day to day care at which time he will be returned in to her care.

While SS is in BF3 care, BF3 is able to travel nurture SS’s relationships with his Grandparents and Aunts and Uncles and Cousins.
Alternate Christmases.

Comments

livinthedream's picture

I am confused about the actual problem you are having in this situation? I understand that this is a 3yr old & that you are dating his dad. In your post you say this something about our son? Also, you are taking him to visit grandparents, aunts,uncles & cousins. In my experience which is many years as a SM ....it is suggested to keep your own life going - enjoying your friends & favorite things to do. We can lose ourselves by focusing on our significant other his BM & SS.

Zimka's picture

This is what BF3 has written to show BM reguarding access to SS15 months. currently she only allows BF3 to have 3 hours access a week with SS and at that time we must have BM's other to kids ( which are not BF3) or we can't have SS. This document is written by BF3 to BM and that is why the reference to 'our son' is there as BM believes she is the only one that has a right to parent SS. BM has stated that BF3 IS NOT allowed to take SS to see any of his family which is why we have put that in also. Bm reasoning is because they don't like BM!
I just wanted others opinion to see if this is reasonable.... I also edited previous post now it should make sense as when I took out the names I didn't change the I's or me's. Sorry

Wicked2Three's picture

I got lost at BF2 and BF3

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"Waiting for them to simply PAS out!" ~ Wicked2Three