When does it just become a joke?

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I'm new here but have found this site enormously helpful over the last several years. Thank you to all you have contributed such solid advice. It has gotten me thru some rough times; rough times that just don't same to end.
My story is similar to many of us here. Disney Dad, mini wife syndrome, borderline ex wife and an extremely rude and self destructive SD 15. I've tried being patient, forgiving, hopeful. I've treated her equally as my own ( I have 2 from a prior marriage in addition to a stepson, who is lovely and my children adore him).
My husband and I have been married for almost 6 years. Over the course of our marriage, his daughter has been consistently disrespectful to myself and her father. She is mean and cruel to the other children. She has taken my cellphone, read my text messages and sent bits of private messages to her mother. Last night she tweeted that she wished her dad would divorce his dumb fucking wife. She is spoiled, lazy, uninteresting, takes no accountability for her behavior. Her father supports me and is equally disgusted with her behavior.
I guess my post serves 2 purposes: 1) just to vent and thank you in advance for letting me and 2) does it ever just get so ridiculous it's funny? My kids are fine, we are all moving forward, my marriage is good. It's just the crap this kid pulls (I've left out a lot of other bullshit), it's a joke,right? Is it wrong just to shake my head at her and be thankful she's not mine?

"Is it wrong just to shake my

"Is it wrong just to shake my head at her and be thankful she's not mine?"

I hope not, because I've done that (privately) with my husband's kids many times.

Ah- thank you kindly both for

Ah- thank you kindly both for your responses. I don't want to ban her totally from her dad because I do think that it's only going to worsen her issues but man, 18 can't get here fast enough.
And I'm a huge Jon Stewart fan - the running commentary is an awesome idea. I'm a person that finds humor in everything - this girl gives me solid material too. I'm not trying to make fun of her or be cruel but good lord... It's such a trainwreck!

Thank you both again for taking the time to respond- much appreciated!

And also to the "thank God she's not mine" reassurance too because THANK GOD SHE'S NOT MINE!!!

There were several times I

There were several times I just wanted to tell my DH that my SD was no longer welcome in my house. But for the same reason, I didn't want to alienate her. I have thought so many times as well ... Thank God she's not mine!

Yeah- there have been many

Yeah- there have been many times I'd like to say it but it just doesn't feel right to me. No judgment to anyone who does put their foot down though. I certainly understand why it gets to that level.

Oh good lord. Yes ... Fill

Oh good lord. Yes ... Fill the tank with vegetable oil!
I'm going to chuckle over that one for weeks. Thank you sharing!!

It's interesting- I don't

It's interesting- I don't think she really wants to come here anymore because we don't center the weekends around exactly what she wants to do. The thing is, BM doesn't want her either on the weekends and her crazy starts going off the charts if SD stops coming. You would think that BM would be more supportive of us and backing us up on DH's disciplining and enforcing the rules but no. That's when the evil stepmother scapegoat card gets pulled. BM also is unintentionally hilarious with her antics as well.
I feel bad for SD. I know she senses her mom shoving her off on us and it's definitely part of her issues. But I'm also a no excuses kind of mom. Everyone has issues and it doesn't give anyone a right to be an asshole.
More fodder for amusement though, right? I do appreciate your feedback. It's such a relief having a community like this.

I have started giggling to

I have started giggling to myself when I write my posts here, because it is utterly asinine what we have to put up with. I have SD19 away at college and SD13 FT since BM died 2 years ago. SD19 is following in BM's (and GM's) crazy footsteps. SD19 tries to control everything, even to the point where she has made herself nuts. She is a mini-wife who thinks she can tell me what to do in my own home.

I never thought I would be typing a post, smiling, at how craycray SD19 is. I was never that kind of person. I can still put the shoe on the other foot and certainly understand SD19's "crazy" but I can't help her. It's not my job to help her. She is an idiot. Yes, it is a joke because she is only 19-1/2 with a brain the size of a fruitfly, yet she wants so desperately to be portrayed as mature and independent. Everything she touches either breaks, disappears or turns to shit. So, yes, it's a total joke at this point.

I thought I was going insane with the thoughts I would have about her, but no, I figured out I have a really good sense of humor. Sit back and pass the popcorn, please! LOL

~ Moon

You have described my SD to a

You have described my SD to a tee. And it is utterly asinine with what we have to put up. I have friends I confide in and they seriously get a kick out of the shitshow that goes on in my house.
As Jimmy Buffet said "if we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane". So true!
Love the description of the brain the size of a fruitfly!

See? I KNEW my SDs were

See? I KNEW my SDs were about 6 years behind in maturity levels! SD19 is like a tween and SD13 acts like a 7yo boy who still needs to be potty trained. Lord help us all. LMAO

I have to share that SD15 is

I have to share that SD15 is also really immature. She has no concept of sharing and throws temper tantrums. She refused to move out of a front seat because she claimed she "called it first", even though she clearly didn't. I just refused to move the car until she did. She's just a pure delight all around.

That would have been

That would have been priceless. I'm using that next time for sure!

The BM I have to deal with is

The BM I have to deal with is off the charts crazy.

Some fun aspects to turn into a comedy routine.

- stabbing a stranger's hand when they would not give her drunk ass a ride home

- kicked out of a low rent trailer park

- thinks aliens live in the core of our planet running our government

- has several DUI she still has not tended too

- has her kid live with us full time but does not want her to like it

- raised her kid thinking you do not have to get good grades, its the school using you to get more money off your test scores.

there is so much more.....Jon Stewart, where are you, write this all up.

Holy crap!! That is a lot of

Holy crap!! That is a lot of crazy!! She stabbed someone?? Thinks aliens are running the government?? Do you just die at the insanity of it??
Ok- the BM in our life had an affair while married to my DH, got knocked up and tried to play off the child as his. Also continued the affair and lied about the paternity to the baby daddy. Managed to finagle child support out of both of them. Who does that??? This was years ago- she still thrives off of constant chaos and drama. She's not happy unless she's miserable and everyone else is as well.

"-raised her kid thinking you

"-raised her kid thinking you do not have to get good grades, its the school using you to get more money off your test scores."

This one is a classic Sperm Idiot perspective. He has espounded to all 4 of his out of wedlock spawn by 3 different baby mamas (my Skid is his eldest) about how it is stupid for the schools to make kids do anything but what the kids want to do, etc....." My SS-22 is the only one of the Sperm Idiot spawned sibs without a record.

And some of the DipShitiots other repertoir...

-lives in Sperm GrandHag and Sperm Grandpa's investment property rent free for more than 20 years.

-pawns his three youngest spawn off on Sperm GrandHag and Sperm Grandpa to raise in their home without contributing a penny to the support and upkeep of his kids.

-physically runs from the constable when he is being served with court summons when one of his womb donors drags his ass to court.

-lives vicariously through the lives of his youngest two spawn who are biracial and can actually accomplish the Sperm Idiot's life long goal to be a Crip or a Blood gang banger. - Congratulated the eldest of the two youngest when he was arrested for carrying a concealed handgun at 16yo.

-etc............................................

-carries an illegally concealed hand gun in his infant childrens diaper bags and when he is pulled over he bails from his car and runs leaving the infant in the car.

-predates on under age teen girls to spawn his crotch dribbles.

Oh yes. It can get so

Oh yes. It can get so infuriatingly rediculous that you can't help but laugh about it. I found myself spouting some fairly consistent statemnts.

"Son, in what universe do you think doing XYZLMNOP would be a ... GOOD .... idea?"
"Kid, what the hell were you thinking when you .......?"
and the ever popular Dr. Phil "And how did that work out for you?" or "And how is that working out for you?"

Not only did I find myself using those with SS I found myself using them with his Sperm Clan too.