teenaged SD and SS who USE DH and I Cant Stand it!
17 SD and 16 SS both use DH so BADLY that it drives me insane. And he LETS THEM!!! I am at my wits end and don't know what to do. I want to Shake these Brats with all my strength and ship them to their crazy ass Bio Mom. But DH has Sole custody of them. What makes things worse is I moved to be with him and lost a job in doing so, and now i live in a town so small that jobs are hard to come by. So I am Stuck at home, Trying to find a job Just so I can beg for overtime so I wont have to come home. I dont want to spend time with these brats anymore than i have to.
But down to the using DH. If SD puts her had out and what she wants isnt put in it RIGHT THEN she stomps off, calls her BM and then BM calls DH and chews his ass until he gives in. Same with SS. If SD or SS wants to go somewhere, even a 2 minute walk to a park, they HAVE to be driven. they cannot use their legs to walk, or ride a bike. IT DRIVES ME MAD!!! I even take time to try and teach SD how to drive and she has no inclination to learn because, and i quote "Im never moving out, so you can do it all for me" When I was their age, I had already bought my own car and had been doing odd jobs along with working a steady job after school because i CRAVED independence. WHY ARE THEY SO LAZY?!?!?!
Vent post more than anything, but its nice to know that others share my frustration.
Lmahr
They are the product of their
They are the product of their parents poor parenting.
Dad has taught them that his no really means yes.
Good luck with the job search. Make sure they can't get their hands on your money.
Thanks on the GL. and they
Thanks on the GL. and they wont touch my money }:)
I don't know how long you
I don't know how long you have been on the scene, or how much you " saw " before you moved in, etc, but I don't think this situation is going to improve ..... Sorry ..... I know that sucks.
Your skids are set in their ways, and plan to go nowhere fast, are they still in school ??
You face a long hard road, can you really see yourself living with these lazy Adult skids in a few years, for the rest of your life ?? I would get ready to leave, get that job, and save, save, save, to get away .....
Good Luck !!
I didnt get to see much
I didnt get to see much before i moved. so i was pretty blind going into the situation. I love my husband and want things to work, but i dont know how long i can take dealing with BMDRAMA and lying skids. Looking for that job still.
wish me luck
The absolutely are the
The absolutely are the product of poor parenting. Unfortunately it won’t change. I would just ignore them as best you can and tell their asses to get out when they turn 18.
This situation will not get
This situation will not get better and in fact can get much worse. Kids with these kind of entitlement issues turn into ADULTS with entitlement issues. And then they will have their own kids, who they will include in their demands.
You need to step back, take an honest assessment of the state of your marriage, and make a determination if this is the way you want to live the rest of your life. Do it now, not "when the skids are 18" or some other arbitrary timeline in the sand. Because the sands will shift to meet the whims of the skids, and it appears your DH will go with that flow without question. Don't count on them being out of your life when they are 18.
Not sure of your age, but you have to be realistic about your long-term future. Being unemployed or underemployed is not good for anyone. You have to make plans for your own financial security and not depend 100 percent on your spouse. If you are not working, you are not building up any benefits anywhere.
Im only 26, so i have time in
Im only 26, so i have time in my future to be a brighter, better person, and i agree being unemployed is not getting me anywhere. I want a job so badly so i can pay "my share" and not be called a mooch by the skids anymore. that and so i can save in my own account just in case i have to throw in the towel.
thanks so much!
He lets them. That's the
He lets them. That's the problem. He's conditioned them, if you will, to think its ok for them to blatantly use him.
Good luck with the job search! I hope you find a job that you love that will get you out of the house.
I know when I lived at home
I know when I lived at home still (intact family, but the concept is the same), I couldn't WAIT to move out so I didn't have to live by my parents' rules.
Concept being - make it NOT SO EASY on them. But if your DH doesn't get his head out of his ass, you might as well throw in the towel. There is NO NEED for him to listen to BM or even take any calls from her. She has no right to run YOUR household.
You are right, BM does not
You are right, BM does not have any say in my household, but he lets her anyway. I hate it. Im ready to throw in the towel though. its killing me though, because i do love my husband.