My SD16 came into our lives this spring, she moved in at age 15, a week after having an abortion and nothing but her clothes on her back and her school bag. We have no parenting experience and wasn't sure quite how to handle it. We wanted to help her as much as we could.
Now we're facing issues and don't know how to handle them. She doesn't shower, doesn't brush her teeth, doesn't flush the toilet, doesn't wash her hands, she 'washes' her hair daily but doesn't do a good job so its pretty scruffy looking. She fibs and tells us exactly what we want to hear when we talk to her about stuff. She uses and started hoarding my deodorant, and razors which really upset me. We try to be nice but its not working.
Very recently I found out I was pregnant. We shared the news with her cause she was home the evening I found out, and she understood it was top secret and why, I was only 4 weeks. At week 5 I had an ultrasound to confirm what week I was, and they informed me there was very high chances of miscarriage. Within 5 or 6 days, it was gone. It all happened so fast.
She was extremely upset about the pregnancy, cried for days about it, and I guess she called random family members crying about me being pregnant. So now word is going around our little town that I'm expecting, people have congratulated my mother inlaw at work, and I'm in one big emotional mess. We're all mad at her, I spent more time consoling her then thinking about being pregnant, or the fact that I was going to loose the baby so soon. I've been nothing but nice, caring, supportive with her through it all, and I feel like I'm at the end of my rope.
And to make matters worse, my husband now has full custody, so I'm not sure of our legal rights if she runs away. Does anyone have any advice on how I deal with this kid?