Running to the Counselor
SD13 was seeing a counselor but decided to take the summer off from appointments and my fiance was fine with it because the counselor wasnt doing shit with regard to SD's behavior and attitude. BM was fine with it, because it was of course what SD wanted and whatever SD wants goes!
SD had some fight with her best friend a few weeks ago. THis apparently is cause for her to now want to go to the counselor to figure out how to deal with her friend.
Is it me or does this seem ridiculous that she needs a paid professional to help her thru this? Dont get me wrong, i believe in counseling and believe that it can help people that have genuine issues but what has society come to when a youth has a fight with a friend and thinks that the only way to resolve the conflict is to talk to a paid professional? Is this typical of the helicopter generation to go to a counselor for every one of life's bumps in the road?
My thinking is that
My thinking is that therapists are good for issues such as helping a child handle divorce or being abandoned by a parent (as was BS19's case when my ex decided he didn't want to be a parent), abuse, or some sort of addiction or issue that is more than likely linked to some sort of mental issue (i.e., cutting, eating disorders, that sort of thing). I feel like in this day and age, especially with kids and younger adults, counselors are being used as a crutch for things that our generations just had to learn to deal with! I mean, seriously...you got into an argument with your friend and now you want to see your counselor? I think a lot of this can also be tracked to overuse of technology. With this generation using emails, social media, and texting for all their communications basically, they are not learning any people skills! They don't learn how to deal with conflict with people...in texts and emails, it is easy to just "walk away". That is much more difficult when you actually have to talk or interact with a person.
The other problem is we live in an age of instant gratification...technology, fast food, etc.. This generation doesn't want to have to wait to work things out...they don't want to wait for emotions to settle down. They want it resolved NOW!
We also have a whole generation that, for the most part, doesn't believe in personal accountability. Like TGIHB's SD, SD15 like to think she is better than everyone else, she lies, she talks crap about people behind their backs. When someone doesn't like her or has conflict with her, it HAS TO BE THEM! She can never look at herself and think that maybe, just maybe, she did or said something wrong.
i COMPLETELY think that this
i COMPLETELY think that this whole thing is my SD's fault.
the friend is the one and only friend we've been "allowed" to meet. SD never brings anyone else over, including the elusive near-three years boyfriend.
this girl has her crap together. she's an honor student, excels in sports, and her parents appear to be good disciplinarians and give her structure and punish accordingly and appropriately.
SD tells us that the friend has been "running with a bad crowd" and that she got some of their other friends to uninvite her to a party. I just dont see it.
I think that SD is the one out of control and her friends dont want to associate with someone who runs wild and is potentially engaging in risky behavior. i think the group has aligned with the friend because they are all smart, do well in school, and dont want SD bringing them down. the friend apparently has a real shot at a future in sports at least in terms of an athletic scholarship. and her family doesnt have much money so im sure the message has been sent to the girl and her siblings that they need to work hard and figure out how they are going to fund higher education. they are all very responsible kids from what i understand.
Oh, I wouldn't be surprised!
Oh, I wouldn't be surprised! If the friend is one of those straight and narrow kids who makes good grades and has parents that actually parent, and has similar other friends, I could easily see those other friends telling her that maybe she shouldn't be hanging around your SD...seeing her as the bad element. I wouldn't be surprised to hear that kids at school are told by their other friends to be weary of SD15! And once you establish a reputation, it is very hard to change it with the teen crowd!
SD15 totally annoyed everyone
SD15 totally annoyed everyone after the breakup...that is except her emo friend from her old school by BM's. I saw some of the responses on her social media. The kids from her school here were telling her to get over it already! Every single day there was some depressing post. Her emo friends would jump to her defense, until SD15 would take down the post because she didn't want to get told she was being over dramatic!