Just a minor vent on homework, bedtimes and adult time....
Ok, so in the past OH has had issues with sitting all evening texting or FB messaging both the skids (and then claiming this as time spent WITH me - couple time!!!) I have pointed out that sitting chatting to his kids is NOT adult time, just because I am sitting next to him pissed off!
My dd's have dancing every week night. So OH has ample time to call them, text them, FB with them while I am doing the pick up (it's an hour twenty round trip)
So I have asked that he do those things while I am out, and that when I get back and my kids go to bed (usually in bed by 9-9.15 at the latest) there is a NO calls/texts/etc rule unless in emergency. This is OUR couple time for us to catch up, connect and unwind.
OH's kids also have no set bedtimes, and they will stay on the electronics all night.
Soooo, last night I went to get dd11, should have been home just after 9pm, dd8 stays here with OH, so she's all ready for bed and I just kiss her goodnight when I get home (she reads on the couch with OH til then)
Anyways, I had car trouble, so I didn't get home til 9.40. Sent dd11 up to get ready for bed, dd8 up to bed. OH was on the phone with SD13 doing her homework - I mean literally HE was doing the homework, she apparently (yet again) ONLY got the sheets yesterday and needs to have it handed in today (huge BS meter going off in MY head) So, she reads out the question and he tells her the answer... I go up at 9.45 kiss my girls goodnight, come back down, finish cleaning up kitchen, get us drinks, go to the loo, 10pm.... still doing the homework....
I ask him very pointedly are you going to be long?
He shrugs. Keeps going for another 10 minutes or so, then asks her how much is left to do, quite a bit was my guess as he then told her he had to go and to email it to him at work, he would do it in the morning so she could copy the answers onto her sheets before school....
SOOOOO many issues with this.
Firstly, my OH leaves for work at 4.30am, so in order for him to do her homework for her he left the house at 4am - so not fair to him. Then we have WHY the F is he doing her homework? WHY did she not get told she should have done it earlier? WHY is she still up? WHY is he not respecting our rule?
Was just so pissed.
But I never said a word to him.
But neither did he get laid
}:) But neither did he get laid last night as well....
Oh I know, I know. Apparently
Oh I know, I know.
Apparently BM sits and does her homework for her some weekends.... This is why the kid is failing school.
But as per usual I am not allowed to comment or have an opinion... well I have one I just don't voice it anymore. Not my kid not my problem.
However if he thinks she will be sponging off us for the rest of her life because she is so completely fucking useless he can think again.
The ONLY issues I comment on now are when they affect me.
Oh, Luchay, sorry to hear you
Oh, Luchay, sorry to hear you are in the same sinking boat I am. We married these guys because we thought they had it together, right? At least mine seemed to. Then you find out that they don't have a CLUE about how to raise kids! Thankful for both of us that the kids going down the drain aren't ours. Mine are raised and are making their way out in the world as adults now. Guess that's why it makes it so hard to see stepkids walking all over their (clueless) bio parents and doing whatever makes them happy. Cause around here, their happiness is all that matters. I used to think I could make a difference and help these kids that the parents wasted, but after eight years and a lot of sleepless nights I know I can't do anything. Makes me furious how people waste perfectly good kids and let them turn into permanent apongers. If you aren't gonna raise them then please don't have them! I hope you find a way to cope and keep your sanity. My SO does the homework for the kids as well and wonders why they can't read and write! I am taking my Xanax and trying not to think about it. I try to remember it's not their fault they had parents who didn't care enough to raise them and I try to keep them in my prayers at night. And when it gets really bad I imagine all sorts of nice places that I am going to go and live when I leave here. Hate to think about leaving the man I love but I am not going to be able to live with his kids forever. If they don't launch at 18, I am out of here! Wishing you loads of luck and patience!