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HELP!!!!! SUMMER VACATION IS COMING!!!!!!!!!

StepdaughtersSuck's picture

Submitted by StepdaughtersSuck on Mon, 06/17/2013 - 7:58am

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Teenage Stepchildren

My step daughter the 14yr old spoiled brat, will be at our home for the whole summer! We don't see her all year (thank goodness) because she has better things to do. But then her mother will send her to our place to spend the whole summer. She expects everything her way when she gets here. My husband defends everything that she does. He works all day 6am-8pm, so I'm suck with her attitude all day. She's a different person when he's around. She's mean to our 3 & 6 yr old all day but when my husband gets home she plays & laughs with them. I can't talk to him about her because he gets mad at me & defends her. I would never have married him if I knew that it was going to be like this. How do I get through the summer? It hurts most to see how she treats the little ones.

Kes's picture

Submitted by Kes on Mon, 06/17/2013 - 8:39am

Lay down a supply of good wine, and start marking the days off on your calendar until the SD leaves.
At 14 she is old enough to be left on her own, you don't have to babysit her - so take the little ones out as often as you can and let her do whatever it is 14 year olds like to do - probably diddle on whatever social network is the current trend.

TBH, I wouldn't have agreed to have her at my house if my DH was never going to be around - it is, after all, HIS visitation. I would have insisted on a shorter visit and get him to take some of his annual leave to attend to her. You have no legal obligation to her.

StepdaughtersSuck's picture

Submitted by StepdaughtersSuck on Mon, 06/17/2013 - 9:38am

Thanks, but I don't drink. My husband was an alcoholic before we got married & for about 4 yrs into our
marriage. Honestly, I would love to enjoy a glass of wine every now and then but I'm pretty sure that if I started to drink he would drink as well. I would love to leave her at home while I take the younger kids out but, then my older cldren will have to deal with her. Anyway, my husband would have a fit if I left her at home while I took the younger ones out. I used to look forward to the summers when the kids would be home now it's so depressing. Sad

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Submitted by CantKeepDoingThis on Mon, 06/17/2013 - 1:53pm

I can TOTALLY understand where you are coming from! Unfortunately, in our case, SD14 lives with us now as of a month ago! There is no "summer visitation" and she barely stays at BM's on the weekends right now because the two of them can't seem to get along (well, SD will have an attitude with BM, and then call DH to come pick her up because BM is in a 'mood', and DH goes running because he doesn't want them fighting all weekend). Like you, DH is at work away from the house all day, while I work from home...so I'm dealing with SD trying to sit in front of the TV all day, not cleaning up after herself (not doing her own dishes, etc.), thinking that it is okay to blare music in the room right next to my home office, etc. LUCKILY, I didn't have to deal with her at all last week...she decided to disappear to her cousins for the WHOLE week. It was originally DH's idea for her to spend Monday there because I had to go out of town with my son for a college visit, and DH says he doesn't trust her to stay home alone (which was shocking to me, because he seemed to be the ONLY one that still had any trust in her after the whole pot incident this last time). She went to the coast with her cousin, but they are supposed to be back tomorrow...so I don't know if the rest of the week will be back to the same old crap. I've already told DH that he needs to figure out something for her to do, because the days she has been here while I'm trying to work have been hell! Even worse now, we had layoffs, so my team at work had to give up some people, which has doubled my work load. I surely cannot take her blaring music or texting me to take her places right now (yes...texting me...can't bother to come knock on my door to ask me anything, but has to text me and then I have to get up to go talk to her, because I'm not playing these texting games when I'm in the same house with the person).

I truly feel your pain, and then some! Fortunately, I CAN have a glass of wine, but unfortunately, I can't keep an open bottle in the fridge without watching it like a hawk, because, yeah, SD has already tried to think she is old enough to drink, too. UGH!

MomOfTwoPlusOne's picture

Submitted by MomOfTwoPlusOne on Mon, 06/17/2013 - 9:31pm

I'm in a similar boat. SD13 never goes to her moms and is as lazy as they get. She leaves her dishes and crap everywhere and give me brutal attitude when her dad is not around. My daughter is not much better, but she's mine so when I draw the line she does what she's told.summer is coming and I'm going to have thee of them, BS12, SD13 and BD14 at home. I DREAD it. I'll work all day only to come his e to a disaster of a house, blasting music and brutal attitude.

dreams's picture

Submitted by dreams on Mon, 06/17/2013 - 12:53pm

My SD should go and visit her mom ever other weekend, SHE is will any excuse NOT to go!!! school, homework, church event ANYTHING!
But if something goes wrong in the house, she will be the first one to run to her mom and complain about how horrible I am....
I know cause I seen nasty text messages in my BF phone.