So I spoke with DH Saturday night and told him I was going to ask SD19 where one of my good beach towels was. I told him I was concerned she would get snippy with me and have and attitude, and that I would appreciate his support.

On Sunday the three of us were in the kitchen and I asked SD19 if she had taken a beach towel (from my room, in my closet, in there for a reason...). SD19 immediately hops up to go get the beach towel and leaves it on the washing machine, returns to the kitchen.

I was gentle, and DH was right there....

ME: Why didn't you ask if you could take a towel?
SD19: Well..SD13 told me where they were (not answering my question)
ME: All you had to do was ask, I would've said "yes." I don't appreciate you just going into my closet and taking things. Don't you think it would have been the right thing to do, to ask?
SD19: (very quietly, deer in headlights, not looking at me) Mmmmm.

Or whatever she managed to utter. Insert attitude. God forbid someone tell her to DO SOMETHING. SD19 left the room and I turned to DH, "It would've been nice if you had chimed in there, about having manners and respect." DH replied it wasn't needed. I go upstairs, once again I am "the bad guy" who does the parenting.

I come down to the kitchen 15 minutes later and DH is furious. I don't know if he and SD19 texted or something, because I don't think she came out of her hamper, I mean room, with underwear strewn all over the floor. I asked him what was wrong, and he's grabbing his backpack and going outside. I follow him and he exclaims that we could've had a nice dinner, but now I've gone and made SD19 feel like she's done something really wrong. I reply, "She went into our room uninvited and took something without asking. She acts very entitled and disrespectful. That's something YOU need to start dealing with." He stormed off and drove away.

I return to the kitchen and see that DH has left his cell phone and there is chicken cooking on the grill. I go flip the chicken and then his cell phone chimes. SD19 is texting from upstairs, asking where a flashdrive is. Get your own, you entitled disrespectful bitch, along with a few phone chargers (see my other posts, she can't take care of anything).

I look outside and not 2 minutes have passed. DH has appeared out of thin air and has landed on the back deck like Spiderman, checking the grill. He hopped the fence because he didn't have his garage opener, either. LMAO....I said, "Well that lasted about 94 seconds. What'd you do, just drive around the block, or did you come back to get your cell phone (that you can't live without, it runs in the family...)?" He said he needed to blow off steam, I am grinning at him at what an idiot he's being, and he was REALLY mad when he left. God forbid someone hurt his little DD19's feelings when she acts like a disrespectful ARSE.

So, I said it to DH again. "I need more respect around here. Your kids have treated me like a doormat for the past 1-1/2 years and you've done nothing about it." He said that the entire conversation didn't have to even happen, regarding the beach towel.

ME: She went into our closet and took something without asking. Or did she ask you?
DH: No, I was out of town. Everything you say to these kids is negative...Do this, do that, do this, do that.....
ME: It's called PARENTING. It's not easy, is it, DH? You should try it sometime....SD19 could've texted you, but no, she just marched right in there and helped herself.
DH: It's just a beach towel...
ME: Do you know how much WORK I've done for a year and a half parenting these kids when all they do is treat me like a doormat with no respect? YES, it's just a beach towel, but do you know WHY I keep the beach towels and bath towels in OUR closet?
DH: (duh-uhhh) Because there's no room in the linen closet.
ME: NO!!! Because every damn towel your daughter touches turns to shit. This started on weekends when she would come over before she even lived with us, years ago. I gave her make-up remover and everything. All she did was wipe her mascara off onto our good towels, that's why I started keeping them in our room! Go look in her bathroom. There are 3 towels in there that she hasn't washed since she returned home from college in May! One looks like a fucking cheetah print because her make-up spots are ALL OVER IT!
DH: Right....., that's not true.....
ME: How would you know?! You never did her damn laundry and now I don't do it, either. I haven't since the week her mother died and the Skids moved in with us. That was IT!
DH: *crickets* (He goes back out to check dinner on the grill.)

I go upstairs, lock the bathroom door and get in the shower. Fuck his nice dinner. Why would I want to sit there with those two morons? All I would've done was beat a dead horse with SD19 and tell her to stay out of my room already. She was in there snooping around for an iPod charger just last week after she broke 3 in a row. I have been bringing mine to work in my purse and I don't even have an iPhone, I have an iPad mini that I never use. Ten minutes go by and the bathroom door opens. DH used a straight key that we have to unlock it.

DH: Hi.
ME: Yes?! }:)
DH: Hi.
ME: What is SO damn important that you have to bust the door down? I'm in the shower!
DH: Um, well what are you doing about dinner? Do you want anything?
ME: No, I'm fine, I'm not having dinner.

...Because my blood sugar is through the damn roof because of all of the stress and pain that I'm in from Skids and fibromyalgia, so get the fuck OUT of the bathroom already! I felt like screaming that at him, but calmly said I wouldn't be joining him and SD19 for any dining experience at this particular juncture.

DH basically kissed my ass the rest of the night. SD13 (Thing #2) came in later and was trying to bargain with DH and I about having her iPod Touch in her room overnight. She needed the music to fall asleep to. Fuck....me.....DH told her too bad and put his foot down. I reminded SD13 that she had only been back from camp for TWO nights, TWO, 2 - 2 - 2, ...and already on night #2 she had broken the "honor code" with DH. She had kept her iPod in her room last night when she was told by DH not to. "But how will I email you my birthday list of things I want?"

Seriously, Skid, get the fuck outta my room.

I told her, "Maybe DH and I are already DONE shopping for you. Consider living until age 13 OUR GIFT to YOU." Sarcasm everywhere. DH told her to move it and leave the room. She kept trying to talk like a mature adult, this coming from a 12yo. I told her there would be homework and stuff she would have to do well on, stop the lying, learn to be responsible. She exclaimed that she DOES do well on her homework. I told her that was LAST year and she's not going to be able to prove herself overnight. DH and I were basically laughing at her antics at this point.

Enough already. DH goes out of town AGAIN Wed - Friday this week. I hope the Skids fucking starve. I am off duty. Thanks for the vent.

~ Moon