I am so worried about my SD
My husband's ex is slowly erroding away any relationship I have built with my SD.
She is calculating and maniacle. She is creating such anxiety in my SD, that everything is a big deal. My SD doesn't know how to cope with such simple life obsticles, and I feel helpless because I'm constantly pushed away. I want to help my SD become a stronger person and empower her to reduce the amount of anxiety she feels. Her mother doesn't help when she constantly vies for her daughters attention, talks to her like a baby constantly (she's almost a teenager), and has instilled in her a deep need to tell her mother every single detail in her life. She is over bearing and expects my SD to be perfect. It's not healthy. I am trying to be consistant and loving to SD, but everyday is different with her. One day she is very stand-offish and will not even hug my hello. The next day she wants to help me with setting the table, chat about boys, hug me for no reason, or comment me on my hair (so sweet because these days, I hardly look in the mirror in the morning). I don't want to be her BFF, I want to be a good adult role model for her. I just don't know how to show her that I am not the "enemy" that I'm almost convinced her mother is trying to portray me as. Do I do nothing? Confront her mother about it? My husband is so supportive of me, but I just don't know if he sees what I see sometimes.
I imagine the best thing to
I imagine the best thing to do is to keep open communication with SD, but never bring up her mother as an issue. It will only serve to make her feel like mom against you. Try to have girl time and talks with her as much as she will allow you. Don't push.
Don't go to her mother for anything. You described someone who has issues, do you really think talking to the woman will do anything?
My partner does not see the
My partner does not see the little things either, perhaps you could tell her that, you care for her, you know that bio mum dosn't like you, but that dosn't mean that you cannot be close, that you always have her best interests at heart, she is very confused by this awful woman, so make allowances, why oh why would this women put her daughter under so much stress it is so unfair, I think that by being understanding and accepting the good times when they come and grinning and bearing it when she is unpleasant, in time she will see that you are not the enemy.