Need advice on preschooler
Today we went to pick up the SO's kids from school like normal. BM was there because she was giving out popcorn to the preschoolers. Everything went fine. SO went in to sign out the son while BM stayed at the door. I went in because typically SO wants to talk to the teacher and I'll take son outside.
Son upon seeing me instantly tries to hand me the picture he colored for the day saying it was for me. I know that he just saw me first so that really wasn't the case. Since BM was right there I politely pointed him to mom and asked if he wanted to give it to her to which he excitedly said yes and then ran to her.
I take no offense of course. This is her child and he's 4 so his focus is that of a good fish. When we were leaving he was first upset because he wanted to stay with mom but the second she was out of site he was fine.
My thought is I'm the future step parent and I'm trying to play nice. I feel that's what I did. Anyone else ever in this spot? How do you handle it? My thought is since BM was there it was best that I in a way step back. Me and son have a good bond but of course this is his mom. I'm not trying to come between them.
I offered to take his school blanket home with us like we normally do when we pick up the and she said no since she was aready doing laundry. I said about how i make sure to wash what they wear home Fridays so they can go back on it on Sunday and she talked about him having on swim trunks. Really the whole thing lasted like 5 minutes but was eerie. She's normally completely silent around me and refused to acknowledge me. Today she was actually polite which was nice. I'm not holding my breath it will last but still.
He could yes but we like
He could yes but we like going together. The kids school is am hour away. We get to talk about whatever and typically we stop to get frozen yogurt before we get the kids or we'll stop somewhere with the kids for dinner.
I would have done the same as
I would have done the same as you. You are right when it comes to preschoolers and their goldfish focus mentality. BM being nice won't last, but his preference for his mother will so pointing him in her direction was the right thing to do for your relationship with him. My SS is five and has come home with Mother's Day gifts saying they were for me and left them for me but I drove them to BMs and dropped them off to her and just said he forgot it. Of course he suddenly remembered it was for her when I said it was and he was excited I brought it for her. Don't think it will change anything between you and BM because it won't but know that it will shape your relationship with your skid which is more important in the end.
Yeah I don't expect anything
Yeah I don't expect anything for Mother's day. I love watching her make a big deal out of his scribbles asking who it is. Of course he just says whatever he thinks she wants to hear. I'm like clearly it's a pink line. I've got a few things the kids have randomly decided to give me and they are on the fridge but really if we kept every single preschool 'masterpiece' we'd be swimming in them.
Don't get me wrong I get excited about doing art projects with them. The best part is sending them home to mom with them.