Coparenting agreement
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So update: My last post "Boundries with pregnant BM," had a lot of comments in regards to getting a coparent agreement. So BF and BM are working on one. Which is great that she was willing to do so without conflict.
They want to write them themselves to save lawyer fees, so i was wondering if y'all had any good recourses that we could use to write it. Or advice on what to include.
Thanks in advance :)
Remember, that while
Remember, that while definitely necessary, sometimes parenting agreements can cover TOO much, to the point where they are just controlling and convoluted. Be careful not to go overboard and to not let BM go overboard.
Be specific, set days/times, use a holiday list, factor in different school calendars and don't forget who does transportation. There are a lot of examples of custody agreements out there.
Thanks everyone! Very helpful
Thanks everyone!
Very helpful
If there is not a CO that
If there is not a CO that legitimizes the agreement it really has no teeth. BM can follow it.... or not with little consequence. If your SO won't be brutally dedicated to BM's compliance to the agreement it isn't worth the paper or electrons it is written on/with.
Like Rags said, they can
Like Rags said, they can write it themselves but it needs to go to court and have an order to go with it. Otherwise it isn't worth the paper it is on.
Make sure you are specific with dates- things like weekends (every other is vauge) should be either 2nd and 4th or 1,3,5.
Odd number years BM gets ____, ____, ____ holidays
Even number years SO gets ____, ____, _____.
Birthday's - how will those look? Don't count on having joint parties off the bat. It may happend (I do that with my bios and ex) but it isn't natural and really hard on a lot of people.
Transportation
Day care
Child support
Right of first refusal (If BM has something going on, she asks your SO if he wants parenting time before she gets a babysitter)
Vacations? Will you each get 1-2 weeks per year that you can take the baby that is uninterupted, regardless of schedule for vacation? Usually there is something about 90 days notice before the vacation.
That is what I have right now...
If they write their coparent
If they write their coparent agreement, and both sign it, will the courts agree with it, or is it possible that the courts will make changes to the agreement?
I know I am a little late to
I know I am a little late to respond, but I also used the software Custody X Exchange. It was wonderful. I wrote the entire parenting plan myself and did expect the judge to possibly modify it once we were in court, but as we agreed with it before we headed into court, the judge simply signed off on it. It does need to cover every single day of the calander year and as Rags stated, the plan is only as good as you enforce it after the judge signs off on it. I followed a 80%/20% slpit with me having sole physical custody and joint legal custody.
Child support was not addressed in the custody agreement, rather as a seperate piece added to the final decree.
Hope it is working out well!