So the other day SS11 asked DH out of the blue when we are going to court?? This was of course after he was called out for lying AGAIN. DH was blindsided by this question and decided to sit down with both of his boys (11 & 13). Upon talking with them SS11 (who i most of the time cannot stand) said I want to live with mom full time (we share custody week on week off). DH was crushed! When DH asked SS11 why, he didn't really have any answer except that his mom takes them out to go shopping and buys them stuff all the time and DH and I don't. I am sooo irritated because we have 5 children total my 2 from a previous relation ship, his 2 and we have a son together. SS11 & SS13 fail to realize that we pay all of their medical bills, a mortgage, 2 car payments ect... DH's ex doesnt pay for anything except all the "fun" things for them. She doesn't even pay a house payment or rent because she is now living with her mother for free. DH ex has moved these boys 6 times in 4 years! They have moved from peoples houses to their own apartments, and even into DH's sisters garage apartment because Dh's ex is too worried about keeping her and the boys in the latest fashions. Nevermind that they never have food in their house ever! But SS11 seems to think it'll be better over there...I wanted to say GO!!!!

We talked to the boys and explained that we are a big family and tho we would like to buy them name brand whatever we just can't afford it, what we can provide is a stable home with plenty of food and get them to and from practices and other activities. We cant afford $50+ Nike football gloves for peewee football (ridiculous) but we did pay for the joining fee $200 each plus my son who is also 11. We put it to them as nicely as possible for them to understand, but SS11 just rolled his eyes and then started his FAKE cry ugh! DH told SS11 that if thats how he feels he better be speaking the truth because we will NOT tolerate things like that to be thrown around to get out of trouble and to hurt others feelings.

I feel for SS13 tho. SS13 is a gentle soul but SS11 (like his mother) is manipulative and sneaky. SS13 is often the one who goes along with SS11 because he is too kind to speak up. So both SS went to their moms this week and of course DH gets a shitstorm of texts (she never talks face to face or calls) from her, talkin about how we need to stop talkin crap to her kids and that she is a great mother. I had to laugh! SS11 ran to her and twisted all of our words.

I am so over SS11's crap! He is constantly causing drama in our home which otherwise runs pretty smoothly. He says sneaky things to the other kids under his breath especially to his own brother and my little 6 year old girl. Its to the point where I don't always call him out so I dont look like im gunning for him, but damn something has got to give!

I appreciate any advice on this matter, I am at my whits end with this kid. I feel like the wedge he is trying to put in place is being driven deeper. DH feels guilty that we arent making him feel more welcome, but i am NOT about to kiss a bratty, rude, and mean 11 year olds ass.