So Frustrated
So my wife and I married about a year and a half ago. I have 2 children from a previous marriage, a son who is now 12 and a daughter who is now 7. She has a son who is 14.
My problem is her way of parenting, or lack of it with her son and overdoing it with my children. Last year when my son was 11, he started a facebook account. Now he didn't ask, and only told us after he had it. Well, my wife got mad at him, saying he was too young, he never asked, etc, etc. She didn't give me a moments rest until I forced him to delete the account. After that, she took his phone away for 2 weeks.
He son however, can do whatever he wants. He id disrespectful to her and I. Sweard, talks back, doesn't do what he's told. She never corrects him. He chews tobacco. It started when his father (a complete piece of garbage) started buying it for him. She knew about it and did nothing. Pretended like it wasn't happening. Now it's reached the point where she buys it for him. She also lets him drive by himself (remember hes 14), take sips of beer, and go hunting on our private property. He has never taken the required safety course, and doesn't have a license.
I am beyond frustrated. How is it that my son who was 11, too young for facebook, and she had a shit fit about it, but her son can chew, drive by himself, curse and hunt with no licence at 14, and that's ok? I love her, but I feel like I can't put up with this much longer. I'm at the point where I just ignore him, and have decided that it's her problem, and she will eventualy see the result of this.
Yeah. She doesn't make him
Yeah. She doesn't make him do anything. He comes home from school, which he is failing almost everything, and goes to sleep. He never eats what dinner she makes. He gets up around 10pm, and is up all night long. Then in the morning my wife plays hell waking him up. Usually twice a week, we mow and trim the grass. He is always in the house. One night my back was bothering me, and I suggested that maybe her son could help. She said, nevermind, I'll just do it. She'd rather do it than wake his lazy ass up. I will say she is good to my kids, and they love her. Just wish the discipline was equal. She has no problem speaking up to my kids on the rare occasion it needs to happen. But wont say a word to her own. One day he told her to F*** off and I lost my shit. Went up one side and down the other. Well, he started crying. She started screaming at me, how dare I speak to him like that? She said you have to remember he's only 14!! Thats when I reminded her that maybe she shouldn't let him chew tobacco, drive cars, sip alcohol or hunt with no proper training or license. I'm torn because I love her, but I just can't stand this kid of hers
Yeah, I wouldn't want 1. my
Yeah, I wouldn't want 1. my child being treated unfairly and 2. my child growing up around someone like that.
Do you want him to think he is 2nd best? Do you want him to grow up thinking that behavior is ok?
If it was me, that crap would change or I would be gone.
I could write a long spiel
I could write a long spiel about working with your wife to get on the same parenting page, trying counseling, etc. But your kids would still be in that home, exposed to that cr@p. And this woman is a criminally negligent parent, as well as the proverbial evil SM.
Dude, be a hero. Pull the Eject handle and get you and your kids away from that trash. You'll be changing the entire trajectory of your life for the better.
P.S. The witch was right about your 11 y.o. not being on fb, even if her punishment was too severe. Keep a better eye on your kids' internet usage, hmm?
I'm not saying she wasn't
I'm not saying she wasn't right. He is too young for FB, and he shouldn't have done it without saying something. Hell, I'm even OK with him losing his phone for 2 weeks as a punishment. My arguement and problem is how she went on a crusade about him being too young for FB at 11, while being OK with her 14 year old chewing tobacco, her buying it for him, letting him have sips of beer, letting him take the truck by himself, and hunting with no hunters safety course or license. How is all that ok for a 14 year old, but my son who was 11 having a FB was what she has an issue with. Thats bullshit.
I would also worry about your
I would also worry about your SS being a poor influence on your kids, especially when they see tacit adult approval of his illegal actions. This seems like a bad environment for your children, as well as a frustrating one for you.
Call the police and report
Call the police and report him for stealing your vehicles, driving without a license, underage consumption of tobacco (a crime), drinking, and hunting in violation of the state regulations. There is no way mommy can ignore this crap when she has to stand in front of a Judge to answer for her crappy parneting while Jr. stands next to her in his Jail stripes.
I would also immediately call a locksmith to rekey the locks to get this abject waste of skin parental failure and her toxic crotch nugget the hell out of my home and away from my kid.
smh