Ok. So I am 38 weeks pregnant with my 3rd daughter. This will be my boyfriend and I's first child together. I have 2 daughters 3, and 7 (8 in october). He has 2 daughters 2.5, and 6, and one son 4.

Normally I love our blended family and we all work so well together! I am honestly blessed most days. But it's days like today that test my limits.

My bio daughters are so big, smart, independent and honestly naturally caring, patient, understanding. Like seriously I'm not even bragging. I have two awesome kids. My youngest has her attitude sometimes I'm not here saying my biokids are perfect. They aren't. But I am seriously blessed. They don't have tantrums or talk back or anything. They both listen and do what they are told for the most part. They might have to be reminded here or there or something normal like that. But honestly they are just good kids. They don't fight or hurt each other or other kids. They don't lie to get other kids in trouble. They aren't constantly clingy and attention seeking.

I know we have a LOT of kids, but I make sure to make it a point to spend quality time with each one, to make sure all the kids get attention. I am a SAHM and he works nights. So we are around our kids A LOT. It's not like we don't spend time with them or anything. Our lives revolve around all of them.

But sometimes my stepkids are something else and hard for me to handle. Here's a little about each one.

the 2.5 year old girl - She has a hard time speaking, we have an appointment to get her into speech therapy. She has extreme attention seeking behavior. Incredibly jealous and bossy. Not potty trained or anywhere near ( not even ready) Sill sucks on her finger. Just really acts more like a 1 year old than an almost 3 year old. But the doctor doesn't seem concerned. And neither does my boyfriend. She's super small and cute as a button, literally in the 3% in height and weight. So people adore her and she eats up the attention. I can't stand it. I try to give her attention just like the rest, but i swear it's NEVER enough for this little girl. If her dad or I are playing with any of the other kids at any other time, she steps RIGHT IN FRONT of them to play with her instead. No matter what it is she puts herself in it. She's rude, and completely disregards any one else. And that's all I can think of right this second with her

the 4 year old boy- He's a sweetheart. So loving at times, random hugs and kisses. But pees his pants a lot because he doesn't stop what he's doing to go pee. He literally CAN NOT STAND STILL. He is always and I mean ALWAYS bouncing around. It's exhausting. He refuses to play outside. And complains about everything if he is made to go outside and play with everyone else. He is literally addicted to video games and I've done the best I can to cut down on his video game time but it's all he talks about and thinks about. We took them all to the splash park and all the did was whine the whole time and talk about wanting to go home and play his game... it's disturbing. He also gets mean with all the other girls, he throws things and hits. Not everyday but it's new behavior to me, I don't know how to deal with the violent behavior. He also lies, a lot. And I never dealt with the lying before. Him and his 6 year old sister i swear have no conscious they lie to get each other in trouble. They lie and don't care about who takes the blame. I've just never dealt with this before. My biogirls aren't like this. They care about each other and are loving.

the 6 year old girl was/is daddy's little princess. And she knows it. It's been getting better but I told him he can't coddle her and treat her differently than all the rest of the kids. And he's done a lot better. And so has she. She used to be so whinny and could never talk without whinning and it was gross. She is 6 and couldn't even put her own blanket on herself at bed time. She's spoiled, coddled, and has the worst case of the "princess complex" i have ever dealt with. She is a "mean girl" and it's such a gross personality trait. I know these kids get a lot of that personality from their mother (who is an awful human and barely ever sees the kids and only wants 50/50 custody for child support in the past 5 months she's maybe seen her kids a total of 10 times, maybe). This 6 year old has recently pissed her pants 3 times in two days. Like seriously, wtf? My 7 year old hasn't pissed herself in over 4 years. My 3 year old has only been fully potty trained for a few months and barely ever has an accident.

Seriously I think something is wrong with these 3. Like why are they so developmentally slow? Is it behavioral, environmental, medical?

I try not to compare on a regular basis, but it's just so very hard sometimes. His girls are TINY and they use that to their advantage. He used to spoil and coddle the hell out of them and I'm dealing with the consequences. I have them full time and i have my biodaughters 50/50 with their dad.

I'm just at my wits end with what to do. I try to treat them all equally and fairly. But how can I treat my 7 year old and 6 year old equally when one acts mature and respectful and caring and the other acts like a spoiled 2 year old.
How can i treat them fairly if they are not at all on the mental and maturity level as my biokids??

I just need help.

I do love all my kids so much. But they are just so much different than what I know how to deal with. I am trying so hard.

I love them and I know they love me. We just have some road blocks to work through. But i refuse to baby and coddle them. I can't. I don't do it to my own kids. I won't do it to them. It breeds spoiled, entitled, brats and I won't raise brats.

Please any advice would be great. Thank you..