My daughter is being pushed out
First time poster...
In a nutshell, I am 4 years into a relationship with a woman who has 5 kids. I have one. After the first 3 months she cheated on me, likely more than I know. Despite this, after living separately for one year, they all moved into my home.
Currently mine, 19, hers 13, 17 and 21 are home. Her other two, 19 and 24, are out of the house. One has a baby and her SO is facing jail time and may return.
My daughter is finding this to be a toxic situation. She is one against five. I feel she is more mature and intelligent than the others, wears her heart on her sleeve.
Yesterday mine said she was done with the situation. The others are very noisy, do not respect boundaries or property. This has made the situation unlivable for mine and she has moved to her mother's.
I feel like I am sacrificing my daughters well being for the sake of my own relationship and providing shelter for her kids.
Before this started I had 7 years to pay off.my home. Since then I have refinanced twice, and everything is in my name as I have all the credit but she does contribute to pay for her wants.
She is fundamentally a great partner, but as said, there are massive cracks in the foundation, her kids are pushing mine out, and the finances are barely under control.
I want my daughter to be happy. She ranks higher than any other priority but in practice it seems I am too late in realizing this.
I started the conversation yesterday that I have seen enough. I will not sacrifice my relationship with my daughter on the altar of her and her children.
Thats where I am right now. I feel like a bastard for letting it go this far, an idiot for letting it start in the first place. She really is a spectacular partner and fun, but the flaws at the beginning have never fully left my mind. Add to that my daughters misery, and I feel my future would be better without them.
- C
She is fundamentally
Your definition of a great partner is skewed.
Return where? Your house?
It's time for you to take back control of your life. Why are you refinancing? It's time for her and her kids to move out of your house. It's time to get your financial life in order. She should have been paying for "needs" not "wants".
She is fundamentally a person who has found someone to provide her kids and herself with lodging and necessities. Moving out was a smart choice for your daughter.
Your "spectacular partner
Your "spectacular partner aside," why is the 19-year-old living with a parent? Isn't it time she live on her own, maybe with a roommate? Is she working, in school, or both? Same question for the 21-year-old.
Even if your partner's kids were good kids, that's a lot of teenager in one household. I don't blame your daughter for moving out. You can still maintain a strong relationship with her by spending time with her at your house or outside of the house. Find things to do together. Share a hobby. Just don't let her become a mini-wife.
Good Luck
Good Luck
I'm with the others. Nothing
I'm with the others. Nothing about this sounds spectacular. Keep an eye on birth control so you don't get stuck in this situation.
She is a cheater, she has scammed you out of God knows how much.
She and her toxic nasty spawn are pushing your child out... and yet..... she is a "fun and spectacular" partner. I supposer her cheating practice has peaked her carnal abilitities into the spectacular range since there is not anything else about this skank whore that is spectactular.
SMH.
For shit sake man, grow a set, and GTF away from this cheating whore and her toxic spawn. And hope beyond hope that your own child has not realized how big of a POS father and loser of a failed man you are.
Ewwww. Dump this ho. She
Ewwww. Dump this ho. She sounds gross. Go get your balls outta her purse please.