I've been married to DH for seven months. He has three boys (ages 9, 8, and 7), and I have two boys (ages 9 and 4). His kids are with us EOW, and mine are with us full-time.

His kids are extremely immature in my opinion. They act like toddlers a good portion of the time, running around making stupid noises, eating with their hands, can't flush a toilet to save their lives, pee all over the seat, etc. I've worked hard to raise my boys not to be that way, and for the most part I've succeeded.

There's a drastic difference between my boys and his, which I've been able to see from the day we moved in together. DH has been a bit slow to catch on, but maybe - MAYBE - he's finally starting to see it.

I had a very frank discussion with him last week about the fact that I'm going to start expecting my nine-year-old to do more chores around the house, and just to do more work in general. He doesn't need to spend all weekend lying around playing video games.

I went into great detail about the fact that he's not going to be able to handle responsibility as an adult if I don't start expecting him to learn to do chores and other types of work now. I looked at DH hard and said, "I mean, he's NINE. How much longer can I wait before it's too late? Pretty soon, he'll have that pre-teen attitude going on. I can't wait until then to start expecting more out of him."

The reason I made that point was so maybe he'd start expecting his own nine-year-old to start doing some stuff around the house. (DH doesn't expect his kids to do much of anything and spends a LOT of time picking up after them and cleaning up their messes.)

DH made a half-hearted attempt to argue that "Oh, he's just a kid," but I shut that down immediately.

"How much longer are we going to be able to make that excuse, DH? 'Oh, he's only nine.' 'Oh, he's only twelve.' 'Oh, he's only sixteen.' You gotta start somewhere, and I'm starting right now, today. He's going to learn how to contribute to the household, starting NOW."

DH didn't have much else to say, but you know what? The very next morning, I heard him call out his oldest boy several times for not acting his age. He actually looked the kid right in the eye and said "GROW UP! You are too old to be acting this way!"

AMEN! Hallelujah! He finally said what I've been thinking about that kid for months!

Then the 8-year-old SS comes literally crawling through the kitchen in a fvcking DOG COSTUME. He wears this damn costume all weekend sometimes. He won't talk. He just barks. If's creepy as hell.

DH stopped SS8 in his tracks and said "SS8, you are EIGHT. STOP with the stupid costume already! Good God! Do you see any other kids your age crawling around and barking all weekend? Enough with the stupid crap!"

I wanted to jump up and cheer for DH! I was so proud of him!!

I went back to showing my own son how to operate the washing machine like nothing had happened, but I had a HUGE smile on my face!