Dating women with children
Hello all. New here and thought I'd fire out a preliminary shot at my situation.
I'm 38, have a well mannered 7 yr old daughter. Been dating a beautiful woman who has a 7 yr old daughter and 9yr old boy(has ADHD). His condition sounds a lot like what I went through in my younger years, but I didn't need med's and special treatment to blow through it all. I doubt its really a legit condition and seem to feel its more of a lack of certain parenting guidelines.
We have been dating for 2 months now and just this weekend we had our first family sleepover at my place. Her kids are a train wreck. The daughter thinks shes way too old for her age and the boy is loud, obnoxious and does not listen. Until my voice is raised. Same with her daughter but a lesser extent.
They drive me NUTS. I love the GF and sometimes enjoy her kids. I have found myself in similar situations with other women and the kids they have. They are rude, no manners and even saw the boy pushing my daughter.
Is it just me and how do I deal with the others kids? I'm starting to feel it's just me and I'm intolerant of any behavior of this type from others kids. IDK. I correct them when they need and there's no problem it seems from their mom. As in shes ok with me doing so.
I've seen some very concerning looks from her boy and I'd really like to smack his ass to straighten him out. Just concerned for my daughters safety. I've already picked up that her side of the family keeps sharp objects, baseball bats and the like away from him...
Two months in and her kids
Two months in and her kids are terrors who are messing with your daughter! Cut her loose! Really, it is not going to get better. And, really, at the two month mark you're having family sleepovers? Way too soon.
He's 9 and there are obvious
He's 9 and there are obvious concerns about him being aggressive and potentially violent? Cut her loose.
She may not mind you correcting her kids, but she needs to be the one doing it. She's obviously not - hence the train wreck. Without mom being an active parent and fixing the problem, the problem is so incredibly unlikely to be fixed, it's not worth risking your daughter. It will get worse as they get older and it Will affect your child.
I'd personally think of it this way - you've been together for 2 months and are seeing these issues. You are in the sparkling unicorns honeymoon period. Most of the real problems don't come out until quite a bit later. If they're keeping potential weapons from the kid now, I wouldn't be sticking around with my kid to see what the bigger issues are.
Oh you all are awesome and i
Oh you all are awesome and i appreciate all the input.I see what you are all writing and it confirms my thoughts.
Damn it. Thought I might have the right one this time.
Just sucks. I shelled out
Just sucks. I shelled out almost 500 bucks to help her and the two kids move up here from tucson. Trying to be captain save em all fails me every time lol
They were moving here
They were moving here anyways. I just offered to help. I Didn't fuck up anyone's life. Thanks for the flame fest.
I'd agree except for the
I'd agree except for the kid's family seemingly needing to keep potential weapons away from him and the kid feeling free to push a younger kid around.
I did not however, realize that the kids had been moved from their home. That kind of transition is often hard for kids to deal with. So leaving home and friends behind then having to deal with mom's new boyfriend does make not the best behavior more understandable, I would personally still be concerned about the boy being violent to my child.