could this be the end?
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I have been with my partner for 4 years and we both have 2 kids each. he has recently told me that he can never love or provide for my children in the same way in which he can for his children. which is ok by me and i understand but it does break my heart abit because my children dont have a real dad, he died when they were younger. so i guess i do expect him to be somewhat of a "father figure" to them. but he tells me he doesnt know if he can. Am I expecting too much. and am i being selfish staying with him, knowing that me children deseve better?
As long as your children
As long as your children FEEL loved by your partner that's all that matters. If the perception of love is there it will be real thing to them.
Throwing this guy away there's no guarantee that you'll find someone to love your kids the way you want them too. Lots of people don't love their stepchildren, or adopted children, the same way they love their biological children. But, if this is causing too much inner turmoil or you feel that his lack of loving them is a detriment then you've have a tough decision to make. You also have to weigh what your kids will go through losing another "dad".
Thats true. I dont want them
Thats true. I dont want them to face another loss. I do love him very much and dont want to loose him. A friend suggested that we live seperatly until the kids all grow up. at the moment our 4 kids are under 9 and sometimes its becomes too much to handle. If counselling doesnt work, i think this may be a option. Anything to keep him.
Wow--all under 9! That's
Wow--all under 9! That's alot to handle for anyone. I don't know how good or bad the situation is but I think you're going about it the right way by seeing a counselor before making any drastic changes.