We get Skids every weekend and they do have chores. They have to clean their own rooms and their bathroom. Do their own laundry. Dinner dishes on Friday and Saturday and walk "their" dog. They have to clean their dirty finger prints off their own walls, not the common areas. And sweep the back porch. So they are pretty much cleaning up after themselves with the exception of sweeping and dishes. Those were added because they can't sweep or clean a dish. Got to learn sometime.

Every Other Weekend, they would still be required to at least clean up after themselves. These are just life skills. It's not a punishment. Is SS learning to clean up after himself at BM's house? My Skids ARE NOT. So if we don't teach them how to wash dishes and do laundry, who will.

I also set up a kids bank account and pay them allowance. It's only $12 a month but they love having credit cards with their names on it.

It's not right that a skid gets to experience all the fun family things but does not have to contribute anything to be part of the family. So annoying.

That's not fair and totally not teaching SS life skills like you said. He can pitch in just for "teamwork" sake while everyone else is doing their chores. And the other kids getting to watch him sit there not participating is just unfair to THEM too!

http://www.a-better-child.org/page/778495
^^^good article^^^

That's really sad your husband doesn't want him helping out, helping with chores is contributing to the family and the better good of the family home and actuallt helps kids feel more like part of the family.

Leaving your SS our of chores could make him feel like a guest in your home...not a member of the family

He picks up after himself, keeps his room clean dusted vacuumed and orderly, does his own laundry, and helps with clean up of dinner, dishes, etc...

No need to have him dig trenches in the backyard, build fences or do heavy labor chores but he is a part of the household, he can help.

Your DH's current perspective makes everyone else in the family SS's chore bitches and beck and call servants.

Wrong!!!!!

Our skids are similar to others. They do their own laundry, help with dishes, set the table for dinner and clear the table when done, they clean their rooms and straighten up the bathroom.

They feed the animals, walk/bathe the dogs. They sometimes help to cook dinner, they carry in and put away groceries.

Some of them enjoy (animal-related things), others they don't. They get a small allowance but it's just a few bucks. most of what they do is not household-centric; it's personal responsibility, which we don't compensate for.

My skids are 7 and STB9, if that matters.

Each kid in our house has one chore that they are assigned to complete on a revolving basis. Like taking out the trash. Anytime the trashcan is full it is that kid's job to empty it. And when it is trash day it is that kid's job to bring the trash can out to the street the night before.
All other jobs around the house the kids can earn money for doing, but they don't HAVE to do them. (But you'd be surprised how often they ask for extra things to do for money) Things like scrubing out the microwave baked on filth will earn them a dollar, or scrubbing the refrigerator inside and out and throwing away moldy leftovers will earn them a dollar. (They can only do these kind of chores every once in a while for cash...but when they really want something they will go on a cleaning fit and go back and forth between my husband and I asking for jobs to do to get the dollar amount they need to do what they want to do)