dh's really think they do us a favor with their children as loving, but strong and assertive parents.

dh was beaming like an idiot about how his grown daughters have done so well. they are on their own; one finished college, has a nice job, and the other finishing at university.

in my experience, dh let his children insult me, call me names and jockey for position of mini wife. he hardly lifted a finger in my defense, and when he did, it was so weak as to be totally effective (sds saw right through him), or too late to be of any use.

dh has totally data-dumped just how hard it was on me. one sd threatened me physically and gave dh an ultimatum--her or me. other sd dropped out of college, got kicked out of the military, spent time institutionalized and then called me the worst names. (i told that sd to leave the house. she was an adult and i would not take that abuse.)

when i pointed this out to him, i guess it rained on his parade, which he was viewing through rose colored glasses. he snarled and said he was hurt that i would bring those things up, and i should have simply said how wonderful the skids are doing.

clueless. they don't really comprehend the mental and emotional cost of the skids, do they?