SGD sees her place as more important than mine!
I have recently been forced to realise that, my early teens SGD, has learned to consider her place in her GF's life as infinitely more important than mine! When we go any where with her, perhaps a short break or she comes to us, or perhaps at a family gathering...it seems that all the little scenarios such as hand holding, walking along the street arm in arm, sitting next too in dining situations, being consulted on what/where/how to spend time, deciding when to go out/come home...all things a wife would consider hers by right, SGD is now taking over! This is what DH and I are going to discuss....very soon! We've been through it once (still going through it) with SD, I cannot start all that up again if I am to stay sane, well...and still with him!
Mini-wife the next
Mini-wife the next generation? Damn, it really DOESN'T end!
Sorry you're dealing with this crap.
Was the SD issue ever
Was the SD issue ever resolved? To your satisfaction? Expect the same results after hours of discussion.
Or, lets face it you've got him days and weeks over the SGD who see him hours at a time.
Why not change your attitude? If necessary absent yourself from the house when the kid is around or don't go on outings when she's going also.
A simple reorientation of your thinking process end the whole problem.
Yes get out and get on with
Yes get out and get on with life. At least it is only for mini breaks.
Noting a confident direct
Noting a confident direct address of these issues will not fix. If she takes the seat next to your husband move her. If she takes too many liberties with making decisions shut that crap down.
Step up and be your DH's confident bride rather than tolerating the crap from his toxic spawn and grandspawn.
Having the talk with your DH is definitely a make it happen thing too. He needs clarity and you need to give it too him.
IMHO of course.
Thanks guys for all your
Thanks guys for all your support, and of course it is only on short occasions that we spend time with her so, mostly I try to ignore it! But I'm sure most of you will know and recognise when I say, we go for a walk, she takes his arm cuddling up close, then turns around and gives me that 'cat that got the cream' smirk!!! DH of course doesn't see this as I am trailing behind! Also, if by chance I get to take his arm she is walking alongside (even when it means bumping into us) giving him that injured 'who does she think she is, that's my place' look!! Oh I could go on and on!!! But I've already started to disengage, every now and then he takes her into town for shopping and lunch....more money....I went once, and swore I wouldn't again, he understands why! There are monthly dinners he takes all his family to, which I withdrew from for various reasons, but now it's accepted I don't go, so I shall just go on easing myself out of these situations, and leave him to enjoy them all in peace!
I generally do get myself out
I generally do get myself out of any occasion, but DH enjoys my family's company and we have spent a few very happy holidays with them. Now he tells me we are going on holiday next summer with SD and SGD plus SS, SDIL and their toddler, the other SGD....ahhhh! I have 11 months to get out of it!!!
Now is the time to develop
Now is the time to develop fake migraines. LOL
Haha....I have them for
Haha....I have them for real...don't think that will get me out of this trip! But I am going to sit DH down a few weeks before (if I haven't hot out of it by then) and explain my expectations of his management of his family's behaviour. If he can't promise me he'll be very mindful of the situation then I'll just have to say I'm not going!!!
you dont need to be a sd to
you dont need to be a sd to be a mini wife. you can even be male or a grandskid.
true, men/boys do this too.
true, men/boys do this too. ss30 accused me of stealing DH from him. I was like WTF? Seriously? But now I can see where this is coming from since ss had lived mostly with dad for the last 7 yrs of his life and dad had completely supported him.