Decided my hubby is the real problem

Forums:

You all know about the horrible things that have happened to me and my bio kids at the hands of BM and Skids. I thought hubby has seen sense after a two year separation at the hand of oldest SD, in which time two of Skids had a child and didn't even let him know.

Well, since this new contact started in April I have tried so hard to detach and not have them visit here. I am beginning to wonder if I have played right into SD hands. She wated two weekly visitation (she wouldn't even tolerate that as a child) this week she has been asking for it upped to weekly visits and back in our home. It's as if she want to be involved in everything again (which is where the trouble starts).

Hubby will not discuss the situation with me. He is dancing to her tune and it's really annoying me. He is only having contact with and communicating with oldest and showing no interest in the other two at all which is a shame because they are the nicer two. The babies are lovely and a pull but he's only interested in hers.

I cannot go back to how it was and she messaged him saying vile things about me and my bio kids and stating she has no interest in us only him. He said he was going to tell her we were a family package...did he No of course not.

Selfish I know but I wish she would just go away again.

The oldest has a baby and

The oldest has a baby and wants to see him twice a week suddenly.

The next oldest has a kid and is being ignored.

The youngest is being ignored. Right so far?

Snap judgment says she wants money. Separate your finances and savings so you're money doesn't get spent.

You are probably right about

You are probably right about her motive...but why does my Hubby find it so easy to brush aside the other two?
She is lethal when she starts and I am dreading her kicking off. I am a cardiac patient myself and don't need her antics.

in my case the skids get all

in my case the skids get all sugary and sweet when they want something. bm spent all cs money with no trusts for skids and still cannot or will not give her own children money. bm knows dh is a sucker.

God guys I am actually

God guys I am actually considering leaving the marriage after 22 years. I feel so sad, dissapointed and badly let down by my Hubby. I hate to admit it but I also hate SD for all the harm and upset she has caused in our life.
I do not have the energy any more to keep trying.These could be my last few years due to my cardiac troubles and what a way to spend them...

^^^THIS!!^^^ Cat, you nailed

^^^THIS!!^^^ Cat, you nailed it. There comes a time, especially if we are seriously ill, that we are faced with the question: "If our time on this earth is limited, how would we want to live it?" Yes, divorce is sometimes very stressful but it's nothing compared intense and continued abuse at the hands of your skids. This, plus the total disregard your DH has for you personally and at risk to your health. Inexcusable!!! I am sure if you went to a therapist, s/he would give you the same advice Cat did.

Kids do not dictate

Kids do not dictate relationships with parents regardless of the age of the kids. Parents, even parents of adult children, are still the parent and hold a notable element of decisioning authority with their children.

This SD needs to have a knot jerked in her tail and learn clearly that she does not dictate the relationship with her daddy.

Today again we've had a

Today again we've had a battle. DH ddecided Skids were to visit our home. I made my feelings clear no they were not and he accused me of hating oldest SD... oh god I probably do but it's been at her own hand.
I am really sick of this, needless to say he's off to her home to play happy families tomorrow and then again next week. More visitation than they got as children

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Decided my hubby is the real problem