All my stepkids (3) are covered under my insurance plan for med, dental and vision. SD21, SS19 and SS16. SD is graduating college 1 year early which is awesome, good for her. As a courtesy I still covered her on my insurance plan until she finishes college in 2 weeks. She met some guy on Tinder and 6 months later she is shacking up with him and now she's knocked up. She texts DH a pic of her positive prego test. That was her way of breaking the news to her dad which she knew would be disappointed. He calls her up to confirm this is what he's seeing and he explains to her he is not happy about it because she's young, not established and barely knows this guy. DH talked to his daughter and her boyfriend and explained to them that they need to handle their business and get her insured because its not our responsibility to foot the bill for this expense. She is somebody's mom now so time to step up. If they are grown enough to shack up and do grown up things then they can get their own insurance. DH explained all of this to them before he even told me she was knocked up. DH and I are on the same page when it comes to this subject. We both believe that if you are an adult and you are making these decisions, you need to be responsible for your actions. This is the expectation and this is what both he and I did when we were faced with the same situation in our own lives, we took care of it and didn't rely or expect anyone else to.

The boyfriend told us he would get her added to his insurance. He asked me to keep her covered until he could gather all the documentation his job required to add her. I agreed to keep her on until they got her added on. He advised me that he would follow up with me with the progress and stay in communication. Well 2 months pass and no updates. I hear through the grapevine that its too expensive to add her to his plan and they didn't meet all the requirements (they have had to be living with each other for 2 years). Next thing I know, my DH tells me that his daughter got on some free medical assistance from her state. she lives across the country in the Midwest. So right away, I dropped her from the plan because you cannot have free medical benefits when you are already covered on private insurance. I didn't want to get in trouble or her to get in trouble, so she was dropped immediately. Now SD, BM and MIL hate me because they think I'm an evil byatch for dropping her off my insurance. DH had my back for once and explained to them that its not our responsibility nor are we obligated to foot the bill. She's an adult, she made a choice, she is being financially supported by her 28 yr old boyfriend, this is their deal, not ours. PERIOD. Its the principle.

I stand on my principles and I have standards, but I'm not beyond helping. All of this could have been avoided if she would have just picked up the phone and called me and asked me for help. She's the one with the situation, she has to be the one to make moves and reach out. It was just expected that this would be covered on my tab. SD has never once communicated anything to me, sent me a text, a call, and email or anything. I'm getting all this info 2nd hand through the grapevine. Now she's having a gender reveal party and I was not invited. So here we go with the passive aggressive bs. I guess you're only as good as your next favor or for whatever you can be used for. This whole blended family thing has been nothing short of a total nightmare.