Your a bad mother
This past Saturday was my BD(7) birthsay party. We had it at a place called wahooz. I paid for the entire thing, arm bands, pizza, tokens for the arcade for all the kids.
After that my dughter's cousin and one of her friends came over for a sleep over. MY SO's kids were there for everything as well. I took all the kids to go swimming and then brought them home. SO did a BBQ for all of them.
After everything was done for the night I made them all a fort on the floor and told them they could stay up as late as they wanted watching movies, which they did. Before I left the bedroom I asked them if they all had enough space, if everybody had enough blanket, and it everybody was warm enough. It was at this point that my SO's BD(6) looked at me and said, "you know what unhappy, you're a bad mother." Believe me when I tell you that I was floored. It just came out fo nowhere. My daughter's cousin told her that she was being mean. I told the cousin that technically I wasn't FSD's mother. The cousin was like you kind of are. You're dating her father and you guys live together. That's when I told the cousin that FSD just likes being mean. That's when FSD jumped into the conversation and said she was just joking.
What's wrong with this kid. The whole day was all about kids. I paid for everything and this is the thanks that I get. And then to turn around and call the comment a joke. It just came out of nowhere. Everybody was laying down for the evening, the only person that was talking was me. It's just nuts.
What a little turd. I would
What a little turd. I would have pulled her out of there so fast and not let her take part in the party. How's THAT for being a BAD MOM??? Or I would have come back and said something like "well, I am a good mom to the GOOD kids...".
Kudos to the cousin for
Kudos to the cousin for calling the little sh*t on her sh*t. I'd be tempted to show her what mean really looks like. I hope your SO set her straight.
SO did habdle the situation.
SO did habdle the situation. At first he made he sleep in her bed which happend to be in the same room that the slumber party was in.
About fifteen minutes I heard her telling them that she was going to tell on them after two warnings if they didn't stop talking so I went into the bedroom and removed her from the situation entirely. She had to sleep in the den that evening and the next morning when I went to go and get all the kids breakfast from McDonalds guess who went without? You gussed it. She had a regular breakfast instead.
If I asked her why she said
If I asked her why she said it she would just look at me and shrug her shoulders. That's what she does for everything. Why did you hit your brother? Shrug. Why did you lie? Shrug. Why are you being so mean today? Shrug. She just enjoys being mean. She likes to dominate and have control of any situation. She also likes being the center of attention all the time. Infact that's why I think that she said it. It took the focus off of me and put it directly on her. It doesn't matter that she got in trouble for it because ultimately she got what she wanted which is, "everybody pay attention to me."
Her mother had to drive down to the police station the weekend before last because she slapped her step sister really hard and when her mother tried to punish her for that she started punching her mom as hard as she could.
I liked this so much, I
I liked this so much, I copied and printed out.
BM lost her kids b/c she punched/slapped SD (9 at time) in the face and she got caught. BM also pulls the yelling, cussing and shaming the skids to listen....e.g. BM told the skids a few weeks ago that when they came the next weekend they had to be good b/c she was having open heart surgery the following Monday. Total lie b/c she was out of the hospital in time to call the skids at 6:30pm.
She has to do this b/c she only knows how to parent by hitting or drugging the skdis into zombieland.
SD is exactly like her and treats BM the way BM treated her....screaming and cussing at her, being a total bitch.
Sorry to hijack but I got all excited.
That's our problem too. How
That's our problem too. How do you get through to a kid that just doesn't care. She does what she does becuase she can. There's not a single punishment out there that would make her care or think twice before she does it again. It's crazy. I told SO that we need to get her into a child psychologist. We need to find out it there is something wrong with her. And either way the psychologist will be able to tell us how to parent a child like this so that she turns out to be a great adult because I have no idea what to do with her or her bahavior. I just know that from the research that I have done online that if this type of behavior is not stopped she can grow up to have a personality disorder.
I don't agree. She's only
I don't agree. She's only six. Most times six year olds repeat what they hear and don't even realize what they've said.
My xh's daughter was making the bed with me one morning. She was six. Out of nowhere, and there was no change in her expression, she said "my daddy would have come home if it wasn't for the young hussy he's shacking up with." I nearly fell on the floor. I could tell by looking at her that she really had no idea what she just said.
Funny thing though, my xh was divorced for 2 years before we got together. He just hadn't dated anyone seriously until me. Obviously that pissed off his x.
don't be too hard on the kid. I'm sure she's just repeating something that her mother said.
I'd like to believe you
I'd like to believe you Totalybogus but you have no idea. I have lived with this little girl long enough to knoe she knew exactly what she was saying.
Let me give you a little run down about this little girl.
She is very physical meaning that if she can't dominate a situation where she is interacting with other children she will hit them. Here's an example of what I am talking about: None of the kids in her kindergarten class would play with her at the end of the school year last year. When I asked her why she said that they were mean to her. When I asked her how they were mean to her she told me that when she asks to play with them they tell her no. I then asked her what how she reacted to that and she told me she hits them. She was also put in detention for punching another kid in the stomach and calling them fat.
Stealing is another issue that we have had with her. This past summer she stold some lotion from another girl at daycare. It was the ex's week so SO and I had no idea about it. The ex told her to bring the lotion back and return it to the other little girl. So she goes to daycare and does it. Then she turns around and steals the lotion out of the little girls backpack again and another gilrs lip gloss . She returned both of those items. She is now no longer allowed in the daycare building unsupervised to use the bathrooms while the other kids are outside playing because the daycare workers are afraid that she will steal out of their purses.
Bullying is yet another issue that we have with her. Both her and my BD were in the same class last year. Her bullying was so bad towards my daughter that the kidergarten teacher was concerned for my daughter development and put them in seperate classes this year.
Lieing is yet another issue that we have with her. It's an everyday thing. The worst thing that she lied about was when she told the cops that my SO grabbed her by her face and slammed her head into the wall. This little lie caused CPS to do an investigation. When she returned to our house the following week SO and her were playing in the living room. SO picked her up and set her on the leather automen on her back. When he set her down her head bounced off of the leather couchion. She sat up and looked SO straight in the eyes and said, remember what the cop said." She has also gone to SO bawling and lied about things that I have never done and then turns around and tells her mom something completley different. Of course she always waits for me to leave first.
She is also very emtionally abusive. Case in point, what she said to me dueing the slumber party. I have heard this kid say some pretty mean things to her father as well.
She always has to be the center of attention and she will do anything necessary to make that happen.
She has been sent out into the hallway at school everyday since school has started this year. Oh and there's more. Way more.
Like I said Totalybogus, I would love to be able to believe that she is just repeating things that she has heard but unfortunately I don't think that's the case at all.
I totally get what you're
I totally get what you're saying. We too had an episode with CPS (DCF here) with the same xsd. However, what we eventually found out is that she was saying all of these terrible things because it made her mother happy.. If the kid even hinted that she had a good time, her mother would freak the F out. Long story short, after 6 years of crazy, they finally took her away from her mother and gave her to her father to raise.
It sounds very similar. The girl obviously has jealousy and anger issues. Have you tried getting her therapy? Getting therapy for my XSD was the beginning of the end for my my X's XW.
Oh-yeah. The lying has gotten
Oh-yeah. The lying has gotten so bad at her mother's house that her mother is actually afraid to leave her alone with her husband due to what will come out of her mouth. Have I scared you yet. Just imagine what this little girl is capable of doing. The right lie to the right person is all it will take and I know she is fully capable of going to that extreme and she's only 6.
Do you think this is the
Do you think this is the result of her BM's parenting or do you think it is just her personality?
It's hard to say. Kids aren't
It's hard to say. Kids aren't just born with this type of personality. These things are learned. I know that SO's ex was very controlling, verbally and emotionally abusive towards him. I know that she was fiered from a job last summer for stealing. And I know that she doesn't care sho she hurts in order to get what she want's. She goes through Friends like they're going out of style. I do think that her mother has a lot to do with it. I mean who takes their 6 year old daughter to the police station? She had called SO before she did this in hopes that SO would step in and parent and SO's daughter wouldn't talk to him so what's the next step? Rush her to police station so that someone else can parent your child? It's crazy.