Hi all... I'm at a loss and need some advice. My SD (12) lives with us full-time. I have been in her life as a step-parent for 6 years. DH has always had custody - BM is a partier, pops pills & drinks a lot. As I'm writing this, I think I know what to do but want to hear your feedback.

BM has standard visitation but rarely uses it. Her current boyfriend is a welder and travels to different states for jobs. Her husband (yep, still married to #5) is also a welder with same situation, so she's been a gypsy for a while. For Thanksgiving DH agreed to let SD be with her mom and her boyfriend. When SD returned, I learned that she was left unsupervised (she was 11 at the time) with a 13 year old boy who was a relative of BM's boyfriend. Then SD admitted they "kissed"... later she said they "made-out". Remember, she's 11!!!!! This morning I found a note in her room that said she "almost fucked him". BM is completely worthless and has a long history of small crimes. 2 weeks ago she was arrested for making false/ abusive 911 calls. I have her arrest paperwork, mugshot (my new fav pic!) and have been in touch with the district attorney's office to provide them with many other police reports I've collected on her over the years. She's always claiming her boyfriends have beat her up, gets them arrested, then pawns all of their stuff. These guys are morons because once they're out of jail they take her back and the sick cycle continues. The police reports from different states/ counties supports this and my goal is to show she has a history of abusing 911 and try to get her in jail for a little bit. It's a Class B Misdemeanor in Texas, so could be 6 months to a year. Meanwhile, SD asked me to call her BM with her so she could ask her questions about being arrested since she was really upset and worried about her. BM lied through the whole conversation to the point where I read the police report to her and asked who was lying, her or the police. In that call (which I have recorded and is legal to do in TX) SM admits to drinking beer while SD was with her over Thanksgiving, but says she was never left unsupervised with this boy. The custody papers state that BM is not allowed any controlled substances while SD is in her care - nothing 24 hours prior to getting her or during the entire visit. After the call, SD and I agreed to block BM's phone number from all of our phones because all of the lying, etc is taking it's toll on SD. Now SD wants to call and talk to her because she feels guilty. It's a toxic relationship and SD is only 12 so I understand that she wants her BM to be a better person, but there is no way we are letting her call BM right now.

DH and I are sick about this. BM's family is completely on our side (except the mom). My gut tells me to file to remove all visitation unless supervised which would cover phone calls too. I honestly want to remove all of her rights, but DH is on the fence. What are your thoughts?

Some additional details - SD usually calls me Mom and we have a close relationship, but only when BM isn't manipulating her mind.

Thanks in advance.