When people tell you how they just "love" your skid????
:jawdrop:
Seriously, my jaw drops when I hear this.....And I hear it from some of the aides and people at skids school. He's autistic and can be a complete, utter, royal PAIN IN THE ASS in a million different ways...guarantee they think he's so sweet, etc, but deep down feeling SORRY for me and Hubby.....anyway....I am also a certified teacher, and I KNOW, because i've done it, that when teachers tell you just how much they LOVE your kid and can't say enough about how much they just LOVE him/her....they really can't fucking STAND YOUR KID and are overcompensating because they fear that you will look right into their eyes and be able to tell how much they can't wait for the year to be over and to be rid of your kid...(just sayin)......
I seriously want to say back to them "how much would you love him if he married your daughter?".....I pretty much guarantee they'd be like "oh HELLLLLLLL noooooo"......
How do you respond when people make comments about how much they LOVE your skid, whom you can't stand?
One time our superficial,
One time our superficial, overly involved neighbor told us how much she "just loves SD9." My DH looked right at the neighbor and said, "You wouldn't love her so much if you knew how much she lies, steals, disrespects, and manipulates us!" Semi-joking, semi-serious...
The neighbor was completely speechless. Haha
First thought in my mind is,
First thought in my mind is, "When can I drop him off at your place then?"
I have so many
I have so many thoughts....sadly, I have to keep them all inside my head :(((
How about saying, We love him
How about saying, We love him too, he is a keeper!
If he behaves better in school, and not so great at home, why don't you raise the issue
of him not generalizing skills to other settings with his teachers and see if they can help him with that? Are there certain behaviors at home and elsewhere that the school should be addressing?
You could try to help them help him - and you in the long run.
It is not physically possible
It is not physically possible for me to utter the words "love" and "skid" in the same sentence, let alone the same thought! He doesn't behave better in school.....well, he does for the first month or 2, then all hell breaks loose....i'm just counting the days before the teacher starts calling me about all the issues.......
I am sorry you are having
I am sorry you are having such a hard time with him but he has autism.
His life is hard enough.
You are a certified teacher. If you were to exercise your teaching magic
around him maybe he could improve. May be he needs a behaviorist. I do not know what state
you are in, in my neck of the woods it's pretty common for the school districts
to have people who are Board Certified Behavior Analysts consulting or working with students
with autism. You need to get him help so that the gains will be felt across all environments,
school, home, community. Everyone will benefit, family, teachers, peers.
You do not have to love him for that, but you could help him a lot.
Your professional background could guide you.
It never has happened, not
It never has happened, not once, so I would probably react with shock and awe! LMAO
LOL, it should never happen
}:) LOL, it should never happen regarding mine either. People are trying to be nice because he's disabled and like "aaw, we just love him"....I call BULLSHIT on that one....
Yeah, we hear it all the
Yeah, we hear it all the time. SD9 tells us herself what they say about her, she really needs that much confirmation. The counselors at summer camp said they LOVED HER SO MUCH, and I was surprised at first. Then my son (who knows the counselors at summer camp) told me they really think she is a brat but would never tell us that. Yeah, pretty much what I figured. She comes on too strong, NEEDS them to like her too much. But what do we expect, after BM fed her a strict diet of "you are a princess, you are the smartest most beautiful girl in the world, everyone should be jealous of you" crap for 7 years.
I say, "then let him move
I say, "then let him move into YOUR house if you think he's so effing great"!
Oldest actually got people to
Oldest actually got people to love her like that all the time. It made it so hard to get her help. When she finally went nuts at school, my only reaction was , "told you so". It also hurt that she could be so sweet outside the home and a violent sociopath in the home (she pulled a knife on BS when he was FIVE and that was just one of her tricks).
But as a special ed teacher, I would never tell a parent that I loved their kid if I couldn't stand them. But there are kids that are just awesome and I do let their parents know how great they are in class, but I am now way more aware of making sure the child is behaving at home as well or we work hard on using the skills they have at school across all environments.
Is he receiving any help
Is he receiving any help outside of school? What do his parents do in terms of helping him and getting him help?
he only receives help outside
he only receives help outside of school since age 6, when i met dad and told him something was seriouslly wrong with his kid. kid was diagnosed at 2 per his medical records, but it was IGNORED by dad and grandparents. mom is a heroin-addicted, welfare-living waste of oxygen. probably has all the problems he has because of her drug use in utero (which she will of course vehemently deny). i'm the one left cleaning up everyone else's messes......prolly the reason i dislike the kid so much. not his fault i know, but i'm still the one left to fix it all. seriously an entire FAMILY ignored AUTISM and MOTOR COORDINATION DISORDER for SIX FUCKING YEARS!!!!! AND, they won't say it, but i know that i'm RESENTED in the family for 'outing' the grandson's issues and making people DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. husband's mother will still tell her friends, oh he just has aspergers....i stand up and correct her and say 'no he doesn't he has a diagnosis of AUTISM right in his medical records'....GET OUT OF YOUR DENIAL PEOPLE and HELP this kid!!!!!!! soooooooo frustrating!!!!!!!
I know exactly how you feel.
I know exactly how you feel. Former SD was an utter terror, but she was able to manipulate people and played the sympathy card all the time especially at school. Teachers and her principals were always saying how wonderful she was, even when she was constantly in trouble for not doing what she was told to do and they would buy her excuses.
I wanted to scream about how bad her behavior was at home and how badly she treated me and her father.
What really pissed me off was that SD completely bought into all of the glowing comments people said - even when they were only being nice because they knew about her issues - and had a huge ego about how smart and amazing she was and how great she was coping with everything and it reinforced her bad behavior.
Then when someone - like me - tried to set her straight about what worthless garbage she was and correct her behavior, she was absolutely outraged I wasn't kissing her ass like everyone else.
I wish i had better documented her bad behavior and shown her teachers and relatives what she truly was. Maybe video taping these brats and sharing the results would be the best solution.
As a teacher, I have never
As a teacher, I have never gone ON AND ON about my straight A students. I teach middle and high school, so by then, their parents KNOW they are A students and well-behaved. I usually divert the questions to them, asking them if they have any questions or concerns, as I know they are aware their child is well behaved, on-task and a high achiever. No need to GUSH over them. When you GUSH it's like you are trying to mask your dislike, IMO.....so no, I don't think your kids teachers DISLIKE them, but I think the one who says she wants to adopt SD prolly wants to do that so she can maybe teach her NOT to be so damn ghetto, LOL...
"she wants to adopt you
"she wants to adopt you because you know how to be ghetto?"
*****************
Hmmmmmm that is a really odd thing to say.
some people think they NEED
some people think they NEED to tell you that - cuz they cant tell you the truth about your PITA skid!!!
Trinka you have seen my
Trinka you have seen my SKID.......PLEASE tell the folks here at steptalk how painful he is to be around???? }:)
Ooo, so many people think SS6
Ooo, so many people think SS6 is such a dream, so well behaved, so sweet, they love him, and so on. DH and I just ask if we can schedule them in to keep him for a month and then get back with us about how wonderful he is.
I've never heard anyone say
I've never heard anyone say that about SS8. It's the opposite in which I have heard 3 people who LOVE kids of all kinds, say they don't care for being around him. This was back when I was still neutral and not sharing my opinion about it so their comments were without my influence. He's not funny (smart mouth sarcasm is not funny on an 8yr old), he's selfish, he's arrogant and thinks he's better than others. I honestly think he's only tolerated by people. I don't think anyone would describe him as a likable kid.
One crazy ass aunt of mine though did say "oh he's so cute! He looks like his Dad". My response "Never seen his Dad, but we suspect he does look a lot like him since he doesn't look like BM". SS8 is a chubby, fluffy faced child about the color of Wesley Snipes. DH is tall lean and as pale as Nicole Kidman. Lol She says what she thinks people want to hear even when it doesn't make any sense at all. Lol