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The things we do RIGHT!

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Submitted by wingsoflife7 on Mon, 12/07/2015 - 7:47am

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I see and feel so much pain from so many here I just wanted to see if you all could share some of the things that go RIGHT the things that might help encourage some other poor soul to try something new and even if its for a brief moment revel in SUCCESS.

So here is one. When the 2 SS's were both finally in our home together (BM just said yeah go live with dad if you want even though she had physical custody). The liked to watch wrestling and then thought it was ok to wrestle and fight in our home. Little to no regard for the home. So I put my foot down and said NO MORE WATCHING WRESTLING in this house. I know the would sneak some now and then but then they are kids so go figure. However for the most part they followed the rule.

The second part of the rule was if you want to fight and wrestle take it outside. We have 40 acres of land and they can have at it anywhere out there. I looked at them and there dad and said. I work to hard to have a nice home and nice things to have 2 kids rip it to hell. So when they started to argue or fight I would say TAKE IT OUTSIDE.

So fast forward to when they were about 16 & 17. They were being stupid and started pushing and shoving as we were all watching tv in the lower level of our house. I looked at the two of them and the husband and said the door is over there go take this outside and don't come in until you are done. About an hour later the husband says...did the boys come in? I said not that I saw but I really hadn't paid attention. He says I suppose I better go see if they killed each other. LOL It was dark outside already and so he yelled for them and didn't hear anything. He turned on the yard light in the back yard to see way back in the back yard the two of them..one holding the other down. The one on top said he won't give (meaning the one held down) They were laughing like a couple dippy kids and neither of them was giving in. My husband yell to end it and they did. Laughing all the way to the house. They came in with a few scrapes and grass stains but fine and to this day we all laugh about it. It was one of the best bonding times these two ever had.

The moral to the story for me was that putting my foot down and demanding respect for my space wasn't so bad. It even gave these 2 and opportunity to relieve some stress and have some GUY fun. Good times!!

wingsoflife7's picture

Submitted by wingsoflife7 on Mon, 12/07/2015 - 8:42am

Congrats that is so AWESOME. I am always either Sandy or their Stepmom. Kind of hurts sometimes when I know I have done more for them than their BM ever has. But it is what it is and I am soooooooooooooooooo thrilled for you. Keep that moment close to your heart.

Here is the closest I have ever come. The youngest who what a Junior in HS had a parents night for basketball. He played all through high school and his BM came only infrequently. His BF came all the time unless he was working out of town. I, well I came even when neither of them did. So on this particular Parents night his BM showed up even though she had not told him she was. The kids by roses for their MOMS. He had gotten one but only one and it was for me. Yes for me. He came up into the stands before the game and came over to us and looked at me and asked what he should do. He didn't want to hurt my feeling I could see he was torn. So I told him to give it to his mom that it was the RIGHT thing to do. I could still see he didn't feel good about it. I looked at him and told him it was really ok, I understood and it meant a lot to me that the intent was their.

We butt heads all the time, he is headstrong and been daddys baby so I am the hardass that has tried to instill some real world smarts into his thick skull. Doesn't always work but I know I got a little bit in there..He proved it that night.