New to this site
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So I'm new here glad I found someplace to vent
First let me say I don't consider myself step mom me
N my boyfriend have been together for three years
At the beginning me n his daughter got along great she
Was 6 when I met him we did everything together
Got our nails done together played board games n
Colored she would lay with me on the couch watching movies
The day I moved in with her dad she told me when
I was alone outside don't forget you're not my mom
How is the relationship with
How is the relationship with your boyfriend and this girls mom? It sounds like it was brought up at her moms house to me. You know she lives with your dad but she isn't your mom. The girl is defending her biomom and that is all there is to it. Don't read much further into it. I have been with my SD since she was 2 she is now 17 and there was a time when she pretty much told me the same. I was offended, but I knew where it was coming from so I didn't sweat it. I wouldn't even discuss it with your boyfriend at this point. She said it to you while you were alone because she knew it was rude to say and her dad wouldn't have liked her saying something like that.
My boyfriend n her mom don't
My boyfriend n her mom don't get a long at all
They don't even communicate to each other it all goes through my
Boyfriends mom. That's what I figure as well but now
And ever since I moved in we have no relationship at all we will
Go all weekend without talking n I guess it makes me
Upset that boyfriend doesn't do anything to change the
Way she acts ever since I moved In she became horrible not listening
To her dad talks back no manners stealing she doesn't brush
Her teeth or use shampoo or body wash in the shower
She's rude to my family has no manners she will always sneak up behind me while I'm
On computer or phone then go tell my bf I'm on Facebook
Or what's in my email like she's trying to catch me doing something wrong
You poor thing you have so so
You poor thing you have so so many years left of this. Your BF is going to have to stand up to this little lady! That is the ONLY thing that will make things better. IF he has witnessed this going on he has an obligation to step in! AS for you you fake it till you make it. Don't let her know she is driving you crazy at this point.
THIS ^^^^^^ Patsy is right
THIS ^^^^^^ Patsy is right on. If he doesn't stand up to her and correct her when she is direspecting you rifht in front of his eyes then this situation your in now is only going to get worse.
Have you spoken to your BF about how you feel?
So how do you know when you
So how do you know when you give up I felt like it last
Weekend especially with the baby mama drama too
When it comes to matters of
When it comes to matters of the heart no one can tell you when to give up. You will do that in your own time. However, think about this. Those if us on this site who suffered the longest are those of us who put up with being disrespected by our husbands children the longest. Those of us who suffered the most pain, where those of us who said precious little or nothing for years, or begged and pleaded with our partners to sort it out. Then after years of it, we spoke up and all hell broke loose, because husband and steps had settled into their rude ways quite nicely, and we now wanted to change it. How dare we. I warn you, if your boyfriend did not pull his daughter into line on day 1, he is never going to pull her into line. If you do nothing about this yourself, nothing will change. If you wait till he does the right thing, you will be waiting for years and then after years of this crap you break because you are emotionally and physically I'll from it all, and you say something, he will fire up into a rage, at you, how dare you suddenly upset the apple cart. she will be set in her ways and your screwed, because for years you taught them it was okay to treat you like this, after all, you said nothing, and if you whinged to your boyfriend over the years, so what, you did nothing to change it.
The next time she is due to come over you tell your boyfriend you will not be disrespected by her or anyone, especially in your own home. Tell him if he doesn't pull her into line when she is rude to you, you will, AND DO IT. Your boyfriend is to blame here for not teaching his child manners, he too is disrespecting you by allowing this.
Then see what happens. You will know if he supports her rudeness and blames you, it's time to leave. Thank God you dodged a bullet. Thank God you aren't married to him, worse still tied to him with your own children. Thank God you are young enough to start fresh and learn from this experience.
Have a read in the Adult Step Children forums for a snapshot of where your life is going IF YOU don't do something about this. I can guarantee, your boyfriend won't suddenly wake up all by himself and change things for you.