maybe its because of how i was raised
Forums:
But it really grinds my gears when DH let's skids question him.
For example, DH says "get dressed so we can go home" and ss says "but daddy can I play one more game?" Not only does DH allow the question, but he will allow ss to play the extra game or whatever it is.
It probably sounds petty, but it pisses me off because ss tries that crap with me and winds up looking at me crazy when I tell him not to question me and then tell him no, he can't do whatever it is he wants.
I feel your pain. However I
I feel your pain. However I am very happy that DH will "suggest" in one tone and if SS doesn't do it he will change his tone and if SS doesn't do anything he will look at him and say "That wasn't a question that means like now"
My SD11 does that also. My
My SD11 does that also. My good friend told me to simply always reply "I dont answer children's questions" I dont know where kids have learned to question adults. We could never do that growing up.
"I dont know where kids have
"I dont know where kids have learned to question adults. We could never do that growing up."
I believe that's where my frustration comes from. In my opinion its disrespectful and because DH doesn't shut ss down he continues. Not even 10 minutes after the first incident, we got home and DH told ss "go change clothes and come back downstairs" and ss responded "if I go upstairs and change clothes can I go outside?"... Seriously?
So, if DH had said no to going outside, would ss have decided he didn't want to change?!
I'm beginning to see DH's laziness to respond "I guess so" rather than saying "I gave you instructions, follow them"
DH does the same and that
DH does the same and that bugs me too. As a kid, no was no and we learned to live with that.
I understand why a parent might want to give explanations, but like you said, the kid doesn't really care.
Unless its a safety issue or something like that I never explain to ss why I say no and neither of them better even think about asking me why or why not if I say no.
Duplicate
Duplicate
oooh yes, add to the
oooh yes, add to the explaining WHY the old when the kid has been told no and nags enough they change the no to yes.... THAT drives me insane!
And SS has it down pat.
Saturday was raining, the grass was very wet and it had just been mowed on Tuesday. But SS wanted to cut the grass... So we had a constant barrage of "daddddyyyyy can I pleeeeassseeee cut the graaaaasssss?"
"no, because it's wet and I just cut it on Tuesday so it doesn't need cutting"
(the explanation bit - ok - I can live with that - and it SHOULD you would think make the kid stop asking)
But no, it doesn't. After a couple of hours of whining and whinging and the above statement repeated in various whiny annoying baby voiced tones (ss in 10 BTW) I hear the lawn mower going.... OH walks back into the house and I say "you gave in?"
He said "I checked and the grass wasn't that wet and he really wanted to so I figured there was no harm it it."
No harm honey, except that yet again you have reinforced the notion that if SS whines and begs and carries on enough you will ALWAYS change your mind....
This is why EVERY time we leave the house and pass Macca's, and fast food joint, ice cream shop, 7/11 you name it we get SS10 "DADDY - I WANT -----" repeated over and over and over and over and over and over and louder and louder and louder and louder - til ss gets what he wants....
Oh my gosh I feel bad for
Oh my gosh I feel bad for you!! Skids aren't that bad and if it ever got there is probably lose it.
But I did just have to get up and walk away from DH and his kids.
DH is sitting on the couch working on homework and ss comes down at 6:40 "daddy can I get a snack" to which DH replied "no, wait until 7". Well at 6:55 here comes ss back downstairs and he says "daddy I think its dessert time" and without even a glance at the clock, DH says "if its time why are you telling me?"
Really? I don't care if it were 7:55, ss should still have to come and ask again.