You are here

Feeling lonely now that I am pregnant

Mariana79's picture

Submitted by Mariana79 on Thu, 06/09/2011 - 9:21am

Forums: 
General Discussion

Now that I am pregnant and sick all the time, I really need DH's affection and attention, but ever since SS8 found out he has been acting extra needy and helpless. If I were an outsider, I would be understanding, but as a stepmom I HATE IT!!!!!!!!!!! I haven't had a conversation with my husband in days and every time he is affectionate with me SS8 jumps on him. Sex is nonexistent because when I am not feeling sick, DH is giving attention to SS8.

I didn't use to feel this way. I used to put up with it, but now I CAN'T STAND SS8 anymore and am not being shy to show it by being COMPLETELY disengaged.

I am lonely, though, and I cry a lot.

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Thu, 06/09/2011 - 9:27am

You need to talk to your husband about how you feel, you are emotional right now so I would plan what you are going to say ahead of time. I didn't talk to my husband about it while it was happening and missed out on all the joy of pregnancy don't let your husband take that away from you. Tell him how you feel you need to let your feelings be known and he needs to hear it to so that you can have a healthy marriage.

MrsFitMama's picture

Submitted by MrsFitMama on Thu, 06/09/2011 - 12:17pm

Ugh... I just found out I am pregnant too and know exactly what you are going through. Dh says how "you don't like the girls much." I got upset with him about how I've been sick or working!! REALLY?! And I don't have energy for your girls that you let tear up the house!!! They are 3 and 5 and extremely needy and CONSTANTLY making messes.
I feel like I need to do what I need to do to take care of me and the baby, because I don't feel dh will. If I don't buy the baby things, I don't think he will. I have no friends over here so there won't be any baby shower either.

My guess is your SS is afraid he's going to be replaced and DH needs to assure him that he isn't. DH should be extra gentle with you with this whole thing too.

Wish I could tell you more... but I'm pretty much in the same boat. Except I have chosen not to tell the girls yet because I know they will get needy and I can't and don't want to give that extra attention. I'll end up having to care more for them than what they already require. Plus it's MY baby. I never got to or will have the baby all to myself because I will have to share with them.

Mariana79's picture

Submitted by Mariana79 on Thu, 06/09/2011 - 5:44pm

Mrs Fit Mama, I know what you mean. I know SS8 needs attention but I am the one to give it to him, I will have nothing left. My energy is so gone already. My job is driving me crazy. I am assuming you are also in the fitness/nutrition business? I am as well and lately just want to tell everyone to f____off and hide somewhere... especially with this heat!!! But then I get home and can't even hug my husband. If DH seats next to me on the couch SS8 jumps on him and tries to wrestle with him. IT IS SO ANNOYING.

Mrs Fit Mama, are you on the baby center forum? If so, let me know and I will try to find you there :o)

Mariana79's picture

Submitted by Mariana79 on Thu, 06/09/2011 - 5:49pm

SS8 is talking baby talk, pretending he is crying like a baby and crawling on the floor... no, he is not doing this to be funny. I don't have time for this s***