BM wins this round!!
So BM had her restraining order she placed against her son stand up in Youth Court and be approved by the judge yesterday. She and her weasel boyfriend attended and SS15, his sisters 17 and 20 along with the father attended as a united front to contest the order as it will be permanently on his record and will make finding employment harder if it goes ahead. The father had gathered letters of support for SS15 and those along with his sisters vouching for him, we thought the judge would see the sense in not approving the order and instead, just give SS15 a stern talking to about appropriate behavior. .
No..the judge refused to even look at the letters of support and just listened to the mother. The father was asked to leave the court room (as the weasel and him were getting fractious) but the two sisters asked if they could stay and say a few words in support for their brother instaed. They did and apparently now all three children are struck off from BM's Christmas list and is blaming the father for PAS-ing the children against her! Umm no lady, you are a douche and the kids finally have seen what a witch you are and how much they despise you ....all by themselves.
So this is going to look even better come next February when she stands up in court again (for the property/divorce case which has been going on for years) to say to the judge...**sob** "....I would so love my children to be able to live with me (they havent lived with her other than a small stint where she promptly kicked her son out onto the streets 3 weeks before before Christmas and he was only 14 at the time)as they have been turned against me by my wicked exH and I fear for my life as my son has threatened me all coached my their father...** sob**....she knows how to play the "poor victim" act!!
I would never have believed this sort of shit happens in families if I hadnt have witnessed this myself.
What a sick bitch to even want to do that to her own son.
Apparently the kid did threaten to kill her but SS15 was at the time being admitted into mental health ward (hospital) as he tried to commit suicide again after being abandoned by BM for the 4th time. She picks him up when he is living perfectly fine with his father but will then drop him off somewhere else to live or will tell him to go into state care and say she will pick him up then dosent. She has messed with that poor kids head for too long and I swear he shows signs of BPD now as a result. He acts a lot like his BM unfortunately.
I feel for the kids and the father. The system is sooo set up to protect the mother even though she is one who causes the issues. So now the kids have finally seen their "real mother" and her mask has slipped big time. All three kids are shattered. The father is shattered as he sees the hurt this women (whom he married and had children with) treat his children the way she has. So very sad.
What mother would do that to her own children?
Visitation? Whats that? She
Visitation? Whats that? She never wanted to visit? She only used her kids as a pawn. She would pick him up but then drop him off to live somewhere else....she didn't want him but didn't want her ex to have him.
What Ditz said!!! Also what
What Ditz said!!! Also what Ditz said, DH needs to nail his XW/BM's ass to the wall for piles of CS after he gets custody. An RO against a child and abandonment of parental rights does not necessarily result in forgiveness of parental responsibility.
Put toxic mommy living in a refridgerator box under an over pass this winter while any income she has goes to DH to help provide for his kids.
That would be an apt Christmas karma. }:)
Court systems sucks against
Court systems sucks against the Dad. At least he has the kids. I would go after her for all the CS he can get. Hit her where it hurts.
But, one thing you said bothered me. BPD can not be caused by this mess, it just is. My SD18 has it, MIL has it. Odds are good your BM has it and the son now does. I hope he is being treated properly for it. My SD isn't and BM lies to her about it. She thinks she has anxiety and the meds are for that.
Technically she "lost" her
Technically she "lost" her custody when she abandoned him the first time, after she kicked him out of the "marital home that was fully awarded to her providing she has FT care of her son". This was at the request of the father and was approved by the court at the time. At the time, that is what SS wanted (he loves his mother) and she was given "everything" in the property settlement providing she has him FT. On the first night we dropped him off (under police escort arranged by BM!!!!) she left him there on his own, so she could then go off and spend the night with her BF. She used to just drop in and check up on him from time to time after work, to make sure he was getting himself off to school etc. The kid was 14 at that time. She kicked him out when she found alcohol in his bedroom and SS told her to F*** off. This was 3 weeks before Christmas. During this time, she was getting the house ready to out on the market, even telling SS to not be in the house when the real estate people come around to appraise the house. The for sale sign went up perhaps coincidentally when she kicked him out..but non the less it went up that same weekend.
Either way, my SO is getting the "case" re opened and has since stopped her from selling the house. We think this latest action on her part is so she can say that she wanted to have him live with her, but was too frightened of him and he is violent. He does have a hot temper and has bad characteristics and may have said what he said to her, but you know what, she would make a saint swear so in a way I don't blame him for how he over reacts with her.
The bottom line for BM is that her BF dosent want her to have anything to do with her kids...and now its true. The BF has 4 children of his own and I guess just prefers her to concentrate on his family which is now her new family and has controlled the situation so much so that he has isolated her now from her 'real" family. Im not sticking up for her when I say this, as I believe everyone has a choice in what we decide to do in life, but when the BF hissed at the two girls in court calling them bitches, liars and a slut (yes he said that to them)....the BM did nothing to stop him calling her kids those horrible and wicked names and therefore made her choice public. She has now sacrificed her own kids just so she can keep her man. More fool her.
So the minute BM kicked out her son the first time and arranged for him to go into foster care, she gave up her legal rights then (as she refused to pick him up from state care) and the father picked him up granting him legal care. Its been that way since December last year as its been going on that long!
Hopefully in court in Feb, the father is awarded the majority % of the marital home, as well as being back paid re CS (as he isn't claiming any ATM) and she goes away and crawls into a hole with her BF. Then I hope she is finally happy. Bitch.
I have watched two boys,
I have watched two boys, almost 15 now, be psychologically/emotionally abused by their moms. The future I predict is that these boys WILL strike these women at some point. And the system is totally failing them. Both have wanted more or full time with Dad because they know their moms are crazy. When they do finally strike out, after years of holding back their anger, they will end up in juvenile or jail, where things will only get worse. The system is despicable.
I totally agree that the
I totally agree that the system is despicable. Why should it take for a young person to fully lose it for the system to then say..."oohh so you aren't happy" and "what do you need in order for you to feel better about your life?"
The fact that the security guards (via the judge's suggestion) asked the FATHER to leave the youth court when it was clear that it was the BOYFRIEND of the BM egging everyone on (even openly calling the eldest daughter a slut) speaks volumes on who the courts are favouring.
The BF isn't even the FATHER!!
Well...one good thing out of this is that now the kids can hopefully be able to move forward without the poisonous influence of their mother.
And hopefully her arse gets well and truly kicked come Feb 2015. I will keep you posted.