and this is why the dad guilt will never go away
As some of you may know, BM is an alcoholic. The really bad kind....that drives, passes out, rants and raves, and gets physical. Everyone just has and does ignore it (even before I ever met DH).
So basically, DH and MIL (since the divroce) do the guilty thing with skids to make up for their moms short comings.
Last night....BM was so drunk that she crossed over a 2 lane road and wrecked her car in a ditch..skids were at home thank god. She then hitched a ride home with a random passerby....leaving the car. Well, the police came to her door......she left the car door open...all lights on in the car...and there was an open beer can in the car. The cops questioned her....she just said she didn't know where the beer came from. She was drunk, the cops called her out on it, and she told them she started drinking after she got home from the "wreck".
Of course, people like this don't get in trouble....and she didn't.
So both SD's are hearing and seeing this whole thing go down. Yes, they know she is an alcoholic. SD16 was angry that the cops didn't take her away last night.....I know SD thinks/hopes if they arrested her maybe things would change.
My DH will never let BM know that he knows..(or at least I will be shocked and eat my words if he does).....my MIL will sob and cry and stress and cry for days.....and that's it. BM will never know that anyone else on earth knows about this.
This comes about a month after BM was actively passing out and coming to while driving both SD's and SD's boyfriend home...and swerving all over the road.....boyfriend didn't tell anyone, DH didn't say a word to anyone. SD has a permit....so not sure why SHE wasn't driving.
How my DH keeps quiet, I do not know. It's the same cycle......and now BM will ass kiss the skids and they will go back into protect mom mode until the next episode. And my DH will get over being angry....and go back to like it never happened.
Your DH will realize he didn
Your DH will realize he didn't even know what guilt could be when BM finally kills one of the skids or some other innocent person with her drunken recklessness. He'll wish he didn't keep quiet all those other times. He's in a difficult situation.
I agree 100%! Trust me. My DD
I agree 100%! Trust me. My DD (a new driver) and my other DD's.....frequent this same road where BM wrecked her car...also a a road BM frequents.
The situation sucks for sure.
Jesus, I hope she doesn't
Jesus, I hope she doesn't kill somebody, someday.
Right?
Right?
Dads will have guilt even if
Dads will have guilt even if BMs are functional members of society. If BMs are like yours there is no chance for them to get over the guilt. I just hope the kids can learn from BM and make the opposite choices. Kids with parents like that go one of two ways. They vow to not make the same mistakes or they end up just like them... I'm sorry you are front seat to this Trainwreck.
Thanks, and yes there is no
Thanks, and yes there is no chance for my DH to let go of the guilt.
I think SD16 is mortified by it all.....and smart so I would be surprised if she did turn out like her mom.
She will get caught
She will get caught eventually; hopefully, she won't kill someone.
Leaving the scene of an accident is a common way for people get out of a DWI. They really need to make the penalties for that stiffer.
I will say I am thankful my
I will say I am thankful my DH never sugar coated Meth Mouth being an addict to Spawn. He fought hard in and out of court to keep Spawn as safe as he could while she was in Meth Mouth's care. He fought that she only be allowed supervised visitation, that she couldn't drive Spawn anywhere and that she couldn't be around any of Meth Mouth's dealers or drug friends. I know he couldn't stop Meth Mouth from doing whatever she wanted on her time, but damn at least he tried and he never hid her addictions from anybody.
Obviously, I hope the skids
Obviously, I hope the skids know they can refuse to get in the car with her when she's like that.
There really isn't anything else DH can do.
How my DH keeps quiet, I do
How my DH keeps quiet, I do not know. It's the same cycle.
How can your H sit back and remain quiet about something like this?? Next time his kids can be in the car with her and she'll drive off a d@mn cliff and than what?? She needs to have her license revoked and attend AA. It's mind boggling how disturbing this is.
The only way to keep
The only way to keep alcoholics from driving, is to take away their access to driving. No keys, no car. They couldn't care less about a suspended or revoked license.