am i wrong?
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Me and my wife have a little girl together, her kids want to babysit her.here's the problem her ex husband disrespects me and I don't want my child around someone who can't respect me, she says I'm teaching our child to hate and disagrees with me.this man goes out of his way knowing I don't want him talking to or around our child when I not around, say at the kids sports games, or dropping her kids off, ect. Plz I need opnions
As someone else posted
As someone else posted earlier, I'd say: listen to your gut.
You're saying this man does not respect your boundaries, so I agree with you, you should not trust him.
The safety of your child comes first, and you have every right to be the father and say no...
Your wife should be more interested in your feelings than those of her daughters or her ex.
The way I found out is our 5
The way I found out is our 5 year old daughter told me that my wife's oldest daughter told her I was the reason she couldn't see the wife's ex( her dad) that her mom (my wife) didn't have a problem with it
So what. Sometimes parenting
So what. Sometimes parenting means being the bad guy once in a while. You are allowed to establish boundaries and decide what's best for YOUR child. You don't need your SKIDS approval, or the ex husband's approval or your kids approval. You are the parent.
I think the bigger issue is making sure you and your wife are on the same page. Talk to your wife and find out if this story is true. Then, tell her that this makes you uncomfortable and that you need her support. Couples should make these kinds of decisions together and agree on things that make both parents comfortable, not just one.
There is no way in heck I'd send my child to my DH's ex, and I don't really care what anyone thinks about that. It's really a wierd request. Ask your wife to support you and respect how you feel.
My DHs ex took it upon herself to track my daughter down at school to give her a talk about the birds and the bees... she was only 8! Ex was asked never to loiter on school property aagain. Listen to your gut.
This whole accusing you of teaching your child how to hate is nonsense. There's no hate in not visiting someone, that's just manipulative balogna. You could always turn it around and say that you are going to send your daughter to a relative that your wife does not know in another state, and if she says no, she's teaching your child how to hate... manipulative nonsense.
In fact I wouldn't even leave my skids alone at our house to babysit my son because, just like you, I'd be worried that their BM would find out and come over in my absence. I bet if you took a poll here, very few people here would let their step kids watch their bio kid. I know mine are not mature enough to handle it.
If you feel strongly that you don't want your child with this man, then follow your gut and protect your child. In the end, that's what matters the most.
I agree with you. No, you
I agree with you. No, you are not wrong. Why expose your own child to the crap that your Skid's toxic parent puts on them?
You are not teaching hate, you are teaching respect. Two very different things. If my bride and I had spawned it would be a cold day in hell that I allowed my child to be exposed to that shallow and polluted gene pool except under direct and very controlled oversight.
It was all I could do to allow my SS to be exposed to the shallow and polluted end of his own gene pool and if not for the CO requiring it I would not have. Fortunately his mom and I raised him in a stable and loving home with standards and he has moved far past his sperm clan.
Take care of your kid. Obviously your bride is missing the point in all of this.
I do appreciate everyone
I do appreciate everyone speaking up, this makes me feel a lot better causei have been left wondering if maybe I should feel guilty,our little girl isn't bio either one of ours but we have had her since two weeks old and she is ours in my eyes I honestly feel like the only part of our life that he should be involve in is his kids and to stay away from the rest
You're right, this man has no
You're right, this man has no business with your child.
She is your kidd, you are the only father she has known. You're Papa Bear instincts have kicked in... good for you!
Nobody ever says, "I wish I hadn't listened to my gut feeling."
I'm seeing everything being
I'm seeing everything being said and I think she doesn't respect me and my wishes but I wanted an outside opinion if I was wrong for wanting to keep my child from this guy due to the fact of her saying im teaching our kid to hate and no one said anything about him not going to his kids games, just to leave my kid alone like he has been asked.and as far as her kids watching her, I'd rather it at our house but the oldest wants to do it at her boyfriends instead of our house and then she is involving 5 year old telling her how I feel about not wanting my child around her dad and how her mom is fine with it.so basically its her fault, but also his for not respecting my wishes that have been made clear and the oldest daughter for involving a five year old and mine for not just walking out, all I wanted was unbias opinions so I knew wasn't me like she has been telling