Told my DH -he is kind of curious about the site.

Step Parenting – you might need to step back before you step in something!

I will vent anyway i want to...... I don't care if he reads it or not.

My feelings are still going to be the same regardless.

Step Talk is a little secret of mine.

:x

Everything I say on this site, I do say to DH. I'm pretty sure he'd be upset though if he found out I was talking bad about his precious angel to other people.

Since I'm new, maybe someone could tell me what all the abbreviations are like DH, and all the other ones because I'm getting kinda lost reading the comments lol, sorry

and doesnt like it one bit..But if it wasnt for this site, I would have gone crazy months ago..I actually read him a post the other day and was like damn honey doesnt that sound familiar bc we got into a huge fight where I were packing my bags..Because his DD causes us turmoil everytime shes over and he sides with her and IM TIRED OF IT..But nothing or noone will stop me from coming here..I love all the folks on this site..They have made me a better person..

You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.
Sir Winston Churchill..

I told him at one point when we were having a lot of arguments... I still mention "that site I blog in" from time to time... I think he feels relieved that I don't vent to him all the time.

One can only hope!

understand why I need to vent. He thinks my telling him how I feel is enough. Quite honestly, this is my own personal venting and listening spot for people with shared experiences. He is a Dad and not a step-parent. He has no idea how this feels.

Never eat more than you can lift.
Miss Piggy

I call you guys my step-friends. He gets curious sometimes and once he asked me what my sign in name is (which I didn't tell him) but he never asks to see the site. I don't tell him about my posts or anything of that nature, but sometimes I share stories from the site.

I had to.

I went to a cabin in a tiny corner of Tennessee in October for a "StepTalk Retreat". Had to explain why....

In all seriousness, I did tell him from the beginning. It was a grand resource to me finding resolution for my own situation. My DH was more than happy for that.

So he knows and absolutely supports it. I also would never post something I wouldn't be more than happy to explain...he also likes that I have a dumping ground because then he doesn't have to hear about it.

"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley

I want some things to myself, I dont need him looking over my shoulder or question me.
I think I posted that I didnt understand why I would be with a man that was married before to such a (BM)..or if I could do it all over again would I?

or that my ss looks so much like BM it hurts sometimes to look at him
No need for him to read that...

I get so frustrated with SD13 that I want to smack her. I can call her a brat here, but it's not something I can usually express at home. My DH is understanding to a point (a low point), but usually he becomes Disney Dad and completely defends SD13 actions.

It's nice to know there are others out there just like me!

Never eat more than you can lift.
Miss Piggy

But, I don't think that he would mind. Everything that I've ever written here, I've told him straight up. On the other hand, I like having a place that is mine, and mine alone, so I don't think I'll tell him. I've become a better person, learned to not sweat the small stuff, and to pick my battles. I've become calmer and I don't gripe to him as much. I thank everyone here for that!

my dh is very passive and usually doesn't question me, most of our problem is the psycho bm and his guilt parenting (which by the way he has made improvements). DH knows how I need to vent and what a horrible person bm is so I don't think it bothers him his main goal is our marriage and the sk's when they are with us. I must say I really enjoy this site and it has been a tremendous help, I like everyones different opinions and life experiences.

"Love is strong yet delicate. It can be broken. To truly love is to understand this. To be in love is to respect this."

But when SD found out due to the retreat, she demanded I stop telling "nosy strangers" OUR FAMILY BUSINESS!

DH said, "If you don't want her to post about things you do, then don't do things for her to post about."

SHE was PEEVED.

I still fear she'll find it. But if she doesn't like the world according to Sita, then she shouldn't go searching for it. (See? Still LETTING go more and more each day!)

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

Do you think that if she found this site, that she would be able to pick you out?

Mine knows...he gets annoyed if I get on here daily I think, though he'd never say so. But he's never asked to see it. He knows everything I think & feel come flying out of my mouth straight to him, so I'm not writing anything he hasn't heard LOL

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

site together. However I am very secretive because when things were really bad with his illness I said some pretty awful things about him that I would feel horrible if he ever saw. Also, when things were really bad I am not proud to say but some of that anger was transfered into my feelings for my skids.

I am not saying that my feelings of anger were not justified, & it was so theraputic to get things off my chest. I have also had some really great women support me on this site as I worked through my situation.

Thanks ladies!

I'm not as active in the site as others, but I glean a BOATLOAD of info from it. I knew I'd have to explain when I started busting out phrases like: Parental Alienation Syndrome, guilt parenting and disneyland dad that I'd clue him to the source of origin for me.

It hasn't come up much. I mainly get on at work if it's a slow day (or evening).

And I give him examples from here all the time because sometimes you guys word how I feel in a better way than I know how. It helps us both understand each others feelings and that we're not alone. And plus, if I need to vent in a mean/nasty/upset way, he'd rather I do it on here than take it out on him and SD. But I also don't say anything on here that I don't already say to him anyways, its just nice to hear other people's opinions and to know I'm not crazy for feeling the way I do.

If he knew what I have said about his kids (mostly SD)which I do say to him just not the way I'd like to.And he would be upset Im talking about our pronlems to others. But I did print out what Crayon blogged about "what BM should never say" he just listened but didnt say much I loved it!

but he has never asked about it or what the content is. Even though I din't say anything here that he is unaware of, I think he wouod be angry if he read it in print and of course I am way moe blunt here than if I were talking to him face to face.

but does not approve. He thinks we make fun of SD. I then remind him it is fairly anonymous and that at least we are not writing out unsubstantiated accusations about HIM on here, then inviting HIS SPOUSE'S family to 'friend' us (like SD did). I think he just gets upset when I tear my gaze away from him at all . . . ha ha!

But he does listen when I read excerpts out loud. Sometimes I even trick him and read something that I wrote, try to see what he thinks about it, then see if he can guess who wrote it - simple pleasures, folks!

"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin

I've been lucky enough to receive so much valuable support and advice from this site, in moments of panic I've said "hold on, let me ask my steptalk friends what to do" And more often than not you guys share wisdom, advice and most importantly support.

He and I are both very grateful such a community exists, even if I'm the only one writing here!

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Albert Einstein

He doesn't get it, but he knows that I come for support. I am a better person and SM for it too. I don't hold onto stuff. I vent and release or seek out a solution. It has helped us in that I have found a place where I'm not alone on this journey.

DH can't understand in that his relationship with my BD is a thing of beauty. BD adores and respects him. I wouldn't have it any other way (respect part). BDs father is an idiot and was not ever really in the picture to begin with. By the time DH came along he had remarried and squired several more kids so BD was not an active presence in his life nor he in hers. So, DH didn't have to contend with someone else feeling threatened or poisoning BD against him. Theirs was pretty easy. They both are easy people to love and to see them you would not think that he is not her bio father. Me and the skids on the other hand, well there is a marked difference. THe relationship is not as close as it once was, but that is the result of years of poisioning by BM that has tainted that. I can only do what I can do. I do admit that I need to be able to come here to release amongst people who understand and do not look at me like I'm crazy. Because the reality is that blended families are more of the norm, but so many people still can't understand and relate. SO, I can share with friends and family, but it still isn't the same.

People who get on HIGH Horses will find the fall to be most painful. ~ME :->

and is OK with it. He knows I don't give out info that could compromise the safety of the kids. Everything I say about BM on here, I say to DH. He knows & agrees with how I feel about BM.

he has never been to the site but I tell him about the advice I hear. I also tell him about other people when he thinks our situation is different or very difficult. Like I have said in the past my H and I do not know of any other blended families so when we have a bad day with SD I can say" we really don't have it that bad, a lot of people in our situation go through this" I comforts him a bit and me a lot.

thats just the same for me and my DH, just to know that we are not alone in dealing w/ BM and the issues that follow it, really help alot. I also think it has saved us from many arguments. "We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand."~ Randy Pausch

He does not think much of it. He would not understand how I could go to "strangers" for advice. He thinks my world is perfect and I have nothing to vent about. Sometimes I will relay a conversation that was posted...and I turn it into..."one of my friends said..." He might ask "who is that?" and I just say "one of my stepmom friends". He just rolls his eyes....LOL! He has no clue how well I feel Iknow you all and how much I have shared.

"God grant me the serenity accept the things I cannot change; the strength to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference."

to tell him. These are my private thoughts. I wouldn't intrude on his thoughts and it goes both ways.

"Madrastra" sounds worse in Spanish than "stepmother" in English; wonder why?

to tell him. These are my private thoughts. I wouldn't intrude on his thoughts and it goes both ways.

"Madrastra" sounds worse in Spanish than "stepmother" in English; wonder why?

JamaicanMeCrazy
DISNEY LIED...THERE IS NO 'HAPPILY EVER AFTER'

and he probably isn't too thrilled because he also knows I pretty much speak my mind. I've mentioned certain subjects and tossed the terminology around (disengage, BM - probably thought I was referring to his ex as a stool sample!, guilt parenting, PAS, and more. I also refer to you all as my step friends. I don't know if he's ever checked this site out himself, I did have it listed on my favorites under Step Talk but recently changed it to "Lifelines" lol Actually, it might do him good to read some of my posts - albeit he'd deny a lot of what I've written. He would also be able to figure out who I am by the name

DH, the in-laws, BM & Skids all came unglued when I started my blogs on myspace, however, I'm sure DH would be more upset if he knew about the Mother in law from hell site I frequent!

DH doesn't know, and if he did he'd blow his top. He doesn't think what happens in our family is anyone else's business. He doesn't even think I should talk to my family about it. I'm sorry, but it affects me, and them in a way, and I need someone to vent to. I think it's his shortcoming. He probably knows deep down what he's doing is NOT right, but as long as he can keep it to himself he can keep doing it.

does not know. And like alot of others have said if he did he would blow his top. Boyfriend is a very private person and he would freak if he knew I was writing about things that happen in our home. Besides I like the idea of being able to come here and vent and use others advise without boyfriend knowing. To me this is almost like a diary..and I would never let boyfriend read my diary.

My FH knows I vent someplace and get advice but I have never told him the website. I have posted on here and cut and pasted the responses for him to see so we can discuss - mostly the one about the cell phone 7 or 8 mths ago. But I won't tell him the name of the site and he hasn't asked in the months that I have been on here. There are lots of times that I have bashed him where I am venting - which I do with a lot of my friends here - but I don't want him to see it in black and white.