Just doesnt sound fair!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay well as most of you know I have a BD15 and SD15 (well 15 1/2). which means they will be driving soon... toooo sooooon. (SD15 is going to be driving one of DH's cars)
My BD's father passed away in 2001 and she draws a check every month that I have been able to put away and build her a very nice savings for college,,, car whatever...
I think my DH is jealous that I have or my BD15 has this money to fall on if we need too.
My BD has been wanting an electric blue color altima, very rare color. I have a 1997 altima that was mine prior to pur marriage and I dont drive it much anymore so I gave the car to my BD.
Now I also have an older SD20. When my DH and I were dating, he purchased her a car for $4,500.00 which she currently still owns.
I searched the net and found an altima that is alot newer, the electric blue color for 6,000.00. So last night I told my DH that I wanted to sale my BD's altima (she wants too). He said "No, I will buy that car and give it to SD20" I said "No, you have already purchased her a car, this is BD15's car and she wants to sale it and if we get what we ask for then she can apply that to the newer car and take the rest out of savings". He continues to agrue with me and tell me that he wants to buy the car. I guess what ticks me off about the whole deal is if he buys the car, he is taking away from us financially. He has already bought SD20 a car and if she would get off her lazy butt and find a job and stop expecting DH and MIL to pay for everything maybe it would not hit a nerve so bad.
But this to me isnt about SD20, its about my BD15. Why cant we sale the car outright take that money and apply to new car and get the rest out of her savings. NOT THAT SD20 had to ever take any money out of her savings toward her car. She doesnt pay for a damn dime..... aaarrgghhh!
Whats fair? He argued with me and said,,, "you just dont want SD20 to have the car" I said "you know I would not mind it but YOU are wanting to purchase the car for her,, YOU have already made this big purchase for her once cant we focus on BD15 for once"
AM I BEING SELFISH AND PETTY???
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It's BD15 car
let her sell it and get what she wants. Tell DH to get his head out of SD20 ass and think of someone else for a change. Maybe long ago he should of thought about saving up for SD20. Too bad, so sad.
AM I BEING SELFISH AND PETTY???
Lady, I got to tell you this one got me. Why does sanity go out the window when it comes to birth children? The man needs to pull his head out of his ass and see what he is asking you to do. If both of you put your money in the same pot and pay the bills then how can he justify paying you with your money for your car? Just sell the car and get the cash and help your daughter. He needs to find the money to buy her another car if he wants rather than expecting you to pay,pay and pay some more. Tell him to get a part time job and get real real. The reason the goverment gives the money to your daughter is because she lost her father and this is for HER. He is being selfish and petty not you.
You need to just tell him
You need to just tell him flat out that HIM buying the car is YOU BOTH buying that car, which is not really selling it at all! YOU ALREADY OWN IT!! Makes no sense. And if he's already bought her a car, shouldn't he be worrying about SD15? I'd sell the car to a THIRD party & let your BD use it towards the car she wants. Then your DH can figure out how to get SD15 a car & quit worrying about the 20 yr old that he already bought a car for!
"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"
I agree
with alwaysthemom and sparky.
It's BD15's car... not to mention, YOUR car initially, so it's BD15 (and yours) to sell it. Forget DH... he's just jealous and selfish. Tell that man straight up that SD20 already has a car, and he doesn't need to buy anything else for her... she's an adult for crying out loud.
Don't worry, sweetie. You're not being selfish or petty... you should only worry about your daughter and not care about DH's stupid, spoiled daughter.
I swear
Your BF is DUMB, Crayon. I'm sure you know this.
I don't understand these men.
Why do they marry us just to put us at the bottom of their priority list?
Oh yeah. That's right.
So we can be their slaves... so we can take care of their spawn.
I responded to this
on the other site....
SD is old enough to buy
her own car. She is 20 years old for goddness sakes! You're right she should be buying her own car, if she wants a new one. Tell your DH that you, as parents, are going to buy all the children their FIRST CAR (within a resonable price) then they are on their own.
nope
Nope you not being selfish he is..As you said this is about your daughter, not his..It disgusts me how these men always try to twist everything around and make it all about their kids! Just tell him "no" and do what you and your daughter want with her car. Screw his brat!
In a perfect world their would be retroactive abortion capabilities. ~ disgusted
Well...Sunshine it's never ending...huh?
I have the best idea...tell your mil that you are planning on purchasing your bd a car. Be sure to include the make, model and price. She surely will feel sorry for both sd and problem solved....hehehe. She will no doubtly buy them for the sd-because as I recall they are her only grandchildren.
Altima's are nice little cars and a 20 y/o has the abilty to work and pay for it herself-don't allow dh to enable her poor work ethic. I think you have valid points...
Stepwitch
Thank you Disney for portraying a positive image on all stepmothers!!!!
geez
If SD20 had her own money and it came out of her personal account, that would be different, your keeping good car in the family , but actually, you are giving SD20 your BD's car, DH is just moving the money around like if he bought it from your daughter,ha (with your money)There's no transaction here, basically your giving SD20 a new car. If the money doesnt come from the 20 year old,,where is going to magically appear, out of your account and finances.
DH gave his 20 year old daughter a car, her good fortune came and past, the car belongs to your daughter and if she decides to sell it ..that is her money, the car has nothing to do with anyone, if SD 20 want the car, she better come us with cash other then from your DH or your account.
think of it this way.
Tell DH Your daughter is getting money from her Bio Dad, he may have passed away but he has provided for her.