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I love my DH but today DH surely doesn't stand for "Dear Husband!"

marika's picture

Submitted by marika on Fri, 05/18/2007 - 1:16pm

So, we were shopping yesterday and I mentioned that I would like to get a few new shirts for work. I didn't see anything I liked where we were, so I said I would like to go to another local discount store this weekend to get a few things. DH says "Great! SD said she wanted to get some shorts, so you can go shopping together!" Excuse me? I simply stopped talking at that point and later in our excursion said, "You know...I just realized that I only have about a week of school left. I think I will wait until August to shop the sales so I get get more clothes for my money." (I know that everyone here can see how transparent that is, but he didn't say much.)

Why on EARTH would he even suggest that? I have told him flat out that I do not like SD so why in the hell would I take her shopping? I love the man with all my heart, but there are times when he is dumber than a flat rock!

Gotta add to this...DH just told me today that SD #2 wants to come in for a visit next week with her husband and son. We have 6 rooms total in the house and one bathroom. They want to stay here. If you read my other post, you know that the next 2 weeks are horrendous for me, but again I am stuck. IF I say no, he won't get to see her for at least a year. If I say yes, I may just turn into a raving lunatic. We can't afford to pay for her hotel and they have just enough money (apparently) to come in to see him/us. Why didn't I just join a convent????

Comments

papergirl31128's picture

Submitted by papergirl31128 on Fri, 05/18/2007 - 1:28pm

I guess as a bio mom also I would be offended if my husband said that to me- don't get me wrong I don't know your situation and I am not judging.
However, I would be hurt if my husband said he didn't like my son. And as a bio parent I would keep trying to get my husband and son to bond or to at least like one another. Maybe your husband was just trying to give you two some alone time to maybe find a common ground. Like I said I don't know your whole story.

marika's picture

Submitted by marika on Fri, 05/18/2007 - 1:58pm

I know that DH is hurt that I don't like her, but he also knows that she has not made a whole lot of effort to be likeable, as least with me. Believe me, I tried when she was younger, but at every turn she lied to me and about me, tried to turn his family against me, and even tried to keep me away from her dad at her Grandma's funeral (we had been married for a few years at that point!). As she got older, I was ignored and purposely excluded during her rare visits. So this is not a new issue. If you are wondering why I ever agreed to having her move in, it is because she is DH's daughter and I will never keep him from seeing either one of his daughters. I just don't want to be forced into a relationship that neither of us wants.

evilsm's picture

Submitted by evilsm on Fri, 05/18/2007 - 1:47pm

I hate shopping with SD11 because she only likes the expensive things and pouts if you suggest anything like Old Navy or Target, she is also extremely picky. She likes Limited Too and Hollister. I told DH that I don't pay that kind of $$$ for my own cloths that I wear for years I certainly am not going to pay that for SD's cloths that she only wears for a few months. I understand what papergirl is saying but seems that Markita has made her feelings well known in advance.

papergirl31128's picture

Submitted by papergirl31128 on Fri, 05/18/2007 - 2:14pm

Let me apologize- I didn't realize she was 21 at that age it is different she is a grown woman- I thought she was younger-
I know that sometimes when i go shopping I sometimes don't like taking people espicially my husand-
I like shopping with my daughter who happens to be 13- that might change after this weekend lol
like I said I am sorry didn't mean to offend anyone-Take care.

marika's picture

Submitted by marika on Fri, 05/18/2007 - 2:17pm

your advice was great for a younger SD and I wish I could take it! I appreciate your trying to help me out, believe me. I am just in a ranting, venting mode right now and it is hard to give any inflections to my typing! Smile

marika

Krissy's picture

Submitted by Krissy on Fri, 05/18/2007 - 3:13pm

Yeah, okay, maybe he felt bad, but as the great Solrolh says, TOO BAD SO SAD. That girl has makes your life difficult from morning until night, and at 21 she is more than old enough to act like the grateful young woman she SHOULD be. Many SPs at this point would've either flown the coop or made the bioparent choose. Your DH should really know better...especially when he does his share of enabling her, from what I've read. I think you're right...sometimes men are just UMPHS. Of course, we ladies never are. Smile