I can't blame my age on dating a man with kids, but I was 37 when SO and I started dating.
I knew from a very young age that I would never want children so I had never even been a date with a man that had kids because why in the world would I shop the selection when I knew I would never buy?
BUT then I fell in love with SO on accident, we'd been friends my entire life and it happened before I even knew it was happening. Once I realized I was screwed and that that I was for real dating a man with kids I kidded myself by thinking as long as I wasn't like my step parents all would be right in the world. WRONG!
My advice for me would be to stick to my guns, to never break the only dating rule I ever had which was to never date a man with kids and who cares how long you've known them you still don't want to deal with his kids.

I started my relationship with my other half in my late 30s.

I've posted this before, but here is the advice I'd give:
• As a SM, you will never have a traditional marriage.
• Manipulative, controlling BM and weak, enabling DH = Step hell.
• Most people will see you literally as the second wife, meaning that BM gets to overrule you any time, any place, over anything. In the US, BM gets to overrule her ex- too. If bio-dad remarries, he is still seen as being owned by and an extension of BM/his -ex. He is incapable of independent thought and just a remarried old fool that BM (and SKs sometimes) still gets to play on. This is the imagine often portrayed in the media and what most people think.
• There is very little genuine research that has been done on SPs, and even counselors will lap up unproven "givens" about SPs. For example, the so-called given that SMs hog all of dad's time and won't let him see the kids. For me, and I know for other SMs, since day one, I have nearly begged DH to do more with his kids, and he would definitely have an even lesser relationship with them if it wasn't for me.
• More than likely you will get screwed at weddings and other similar family events. Since society sees you as the 2nd submissive wife, with BM in control, everyone will expect BM and DH to hang out together at family events. Yes, BM and DH are parents, but they are NOT a couple. Despite you and DH being married for 15 years, for example, whenever BM is around, pretty much everyone will think and treat BM and DH like a couple. Even after 20 years of marriage, if you try to take your place next to your husband, you will be accused of trying to usurp BM, and “how dare you!!!” At these events, SM or step-dad is usually seen as an annoying object in the way, because everyone knows that BM and bio-dad are the REAL couple, despite that fact that their first impulse when laying eyes on each other may be to beat the living crap out of the other.
• You will never get anywhere near the kudos you deserve for what you have done for DH’s family and how you have kept it and them all together throughout the years. As a matter of fact, you may even and probably will be punished for your good efforts.
• AT the end of the day, try to put up with it the best you can until the SKs are adults, and then if the family still hasn’t figured out that you and DH are a couple and deserve to be treated like a couple 100% of the time, disengage from a family that expects you to continually pay the price for their divorce that happened XYZ years ago and that you had no part in. Just say NO whenever you feel No. Use NO wisely and use it well. You don’t have to go to events where you are treated little better than cattle fodder. The divine family can all hang out together and sort out their own family ills. Granted, they may not miss SM, but they will miss their scapegoat.
• YOU on the other hand, love your DH, let him deal alone with the adult SKs (and SGKs) every chance you get, and enjoy yourself! You know you’re married to your DH, and your DH knows that he is married to you. If he doesn't, there is always the door.

Q: If you could go back in time what advice would you give your younger self in terms of dating a man with kid(s) & why?

Also if you don't mind, at what age did you start your relationship with your other half.

This is a good question
.
My main advice would be to go to therapy first by yourself and make sure that you are not working through issues that you had as a child. We tend to try and repeat our childhoods in unconscious hopes of changing the outcome. It is scientifically proven it happens, what also happens is that we marry our Dad's or at times qualities of our mother's. Make sure they are the good qualities as we tend to be blinded. After that if your willing to listen to your gut and not ignore reality then you know what you're getting into.
Also, try and understand why he got divorced in the first place as it takes two, so has he worked on why he got divorced or is he blameless, if he's blameless he's lying. Look for any unresolved feelings and attachment's to the ex. And if he has a daughter is she a daughter or has she been displaced, enmeshed or being groomed in anyway, that's trouble. And... if you parent together do not let the skids split you, that he has your back. If you decide not to parent together great, step out of the way and just be supportive and accepting, probably the better answer. This all depends if he has full custody or shared. If that makes sense.

Personally I say I would have never married 38 y/o Randy with 3 children if I knew how much trouble and angst and hurt and I could go on, it was a nightmare at one point and now it's a nightmare once in a while when they show up. etc....So ungrateful.
If I knew what I know now and I would have listened to someone I would...maybe.

30.

Do not get involved ever with the children, be yourself from day one and do not feel sorry for any child from a broken home, regardless divorce or death of a parent.

Have boundaries from day one, with skid and ex and partner

Never combine finances in any way or form, first time the guy ask you to pay for something cause he forgot his wallet at home, see it as a trend and remind him every time to take his wallet

If I could go back in time... I would go find my husband BEFORE he met his EX...lol.

No.. I am not sure I could give myself too much different advice. I met my DH when I was 38. I was pretty sure at that point in life most people I met would have children.

I guess in the grand scheme of things, the Skids that I had were not bad in comparison to a lot of the horror stories on here, so if I had done something differently.. maybe I would have been one of the more unlucky ones?

The person in the equation I disliked the most was the EX because she just was super nasty (still is.. her kids know she is like that.. they think it's funny when she goes off on people. My DH and I are not her only victims... even her girls get it sometimes).

Maybe I would have told myself to break things off earlier with other relationships before hand... then I may have had more of a chance to have a child of my own I guess.

Met DH at 51.

Advice to younger self: Drop everything you are doing and go find this man BEFORE that harridan meets him and beats his psyche to a bloody pulp. Have children with him - there will be no skids.

Assuming the time machine only dials back 5 years, not 20, speak up about that girl's behavior immediately. Do not assume he knows better than you and has some grand plan. Set the precedent with girl that you are not to be trifled with from the beginning.

Above all, do NOT move into his house. Buy a house together. Set house rules for cleanliness, behavior, etc. immediately. Never live in a situation where you are a disempowered guest or every standard you try to set is viewed as "change" to a pre-existing comfortable setup.

But, really, go find the man early on. Live a joyous happy life together and raise lovely kids together.

Oops - wrong thread!

I am a non breeding StepDad rather than a SM but.... yes... if I could go back in time I would do it all over again pretty much as I did it the first time.

I was 29 when my bride and I met and started dating. SS-24 was 15mos old. DW was 18. I was 30 and DW was a month shy of 19 when we married. We married the week before SS turned 2yo. So I guess I was not the one that gave up my younger self. DW did that when she became a mom at 16. I/we made every effort to make sure that DW and I supported opportunities for both of us to pursue our educations and careers and though she was a single teen mom for her first year of college she was able to have a successful college experience and professional career (Dual Major BS (Honors), MBA (Honors), CPA) with the accommodations that were required since she was a student, a mom and married.

In two short words, I would advise myself of the following:

"Expect nothing."

Don't expect that things will get better, in fact they could get worse. Don't expect that the skids will open up to you, they may be in a permanently closed mode. Don't expect that anything you do for them will be truly appreciated, by either the skids or your DH. Don't expect that the BM will ever come to a phase of "normalcy" and accept (like an adult) that her exDH has now moved on with his life. Don't expect that any problems will go away once the skids get older; troubles can actually get more complicated the older they get (the skids spouses, gskids, etc.) Don't expect that your DH's past (BM and skids) will ever go away. Even if he never sees them, they will be like ghosts who haunt his mind and his behaviors. Forever.

Honestly... After all the hell I've been through... I would have ran and never looked back. I've lost so much time, energy, money, and most of all I lost myself. I lost myself for absolutely nothing. I don't think I would ever date anyone with children again. Which is sad because I know all men are not like my ex but I am terrified at having to go through any of that again. I would not have stayed in the relationship at all.