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Holiday pics

Green4go's picture

So today we received the 2016 holiday pic from the MIL. It was a Santa pic of the SD and her 2 sisters. The 2 sisters are of zero relation the SD's father. So the are of NO relation to the MIL either. Yet, our holiday photo is of the ex's 3 kids. Who the heck does this or am I the only one that finds this odd?

As I have posted in other posts...yes, my SO helped raise the older sister and was heavily involved with the older child 13 since she was 3. They lived together till about 5 years ago. So that one I can kinda get because they do have a bond. But to receive that as a holiday gift? I maybe just am not getting the etiquette of xskids with families?? I still believe that it doesn't excuse the fact that all 3 of her kids photo were given as a "gift".

So I feel as if this pic deserves to go into a box and never brought out again. Because in my book it would be like giving them a pic of each others children from ex's. Not to mention the ex is someone they claim to despise?

So is this right? Am I over reacting? I just think its an Ahole move. like ousting my daughter and I from the family pics last year to involve these kids.

JamJam's picture

XSKids can still have a relationship with the former SFather. I actually just spoke to my xsfather today but to receive a picture, that doesn't include you or your daughter is a bit on the rude side. But then again can you even say this to the MIL. Christmas is tomorrow, keep it up (preferably masked by other cards or pictures) until the new year and then away in a box it goes!

Green4go's picture

The older one we are pretty active in her life, but the toddler not so much. I just think that it isn't cool to give us a picture of the ex's kids particularly one that we have nothing to do with and have only seen a couple times.

JamJam's picture

Oh definitely agree that it's strange! But if you can make it last a week, stuff it in a box on Jan 2! And disrespectful since last year there were folks, namely you and your daughter, missing from the picture.

twoviewpoints's picture

Time to do your own family photos. DH, you, SD, and your child. Pretty the group up and head down to have whatever shots (individual and group) you please and will find meaningful to display.

You can't control what others do and/or give. Right or wrong, MIL has decided to do her thing...now just says 'thanks' and do your own thing. MIL will drive you insane trying to figure out why she does what she does. From now on, DH and you just resign yourself that if you want a pleasing family photo of your little household you're going to have to do it yourself. Sure, what ever photos MIL sends can just be momentarily 'enjoyed' (read here, however long you can tolerate it and DH is ready to put it away) then off to the photo box it goes.

At least there's one bright spot in the photo MIL gave. What? It's only the children and she refrained from having one done of BM and the sisters and sending that one. Wink

Craving Normality's picture

Every holiday I do shopping center snaps with whoever is with me. Skid, bio or friend. It's not a huge deal for me. $20 at the local shopping mall and kids are happy. I rarely get just the kids I want in it. I send a pic to MIL sometimes when I want to be a bit mean, with her bio grand kids and my kids, (her gradskids) probably gives her the shits. I hope so.

Disillusioned's picture

I think if your MIL included the EX's kids, she should have at least included your kids too. Yes, it was rude

notasm3's picture

Forward the picture to the mother of those 3 children and tell her that you received it by mistake.

Maxwell09's picture

Or you could just throw it in the skids rooms for them to look at it since it's a picture of their siblings. I would be annoyed but I also understand that while I have no value in it, my SS might want a picture of his other brother in his room. There's been a few times SS's teachers have sent home pictures from class parties of BM; obviously I don't want them so I send them to her house or toss it if you don't think the kid wants it. No big deal.

still learning's picture

Tuck it away in a photo album or memory book that stays in SD's room.

Silly MIL bending over backwards trying to please BM, thinking she's pleasing DH, but really just excluding and ticking most of the family off. I'm taking notes from these boards on what NOT to do as a MIL Wink