This B***H!!!! is driving me to drink! ((JUST VENTING))
If I have to hear the excuse "but I have three kids, you don't understand how hard it is" one more time, I'm going to scream!!! I know LOTS of people that have three + kids and don't have the problems she has. It's called structure, consistency...and oh ya DISCIPLINE! I'll give her one break, the fact that she has three kids with three dad's and their schedules aren't identical..so I'm sure that poses a little challenge, but that's not DH's fault, or SS's fault, yet she punishes them for her life choices.
Also, she refers to all her kids' dad's as "Pieces of shit" which I find obnoxious and offensive. She doesn't even know what it's like to deal with a POS baby daddy. All THREE of her kids dads are active participants in their children's lives, have them 50% of the time or more AND watch her other children when she's in a jam (or I should say their STUPID wives - myself included - do). My bio dad was a POS. He never paid my mom one dime in child support, he never visited me or helped my mom in any way. So how DARE she claim that she has POS BD's. UGH she makes me soooo MAD. I could go on and on, but I'm realizing this is a very pointless and obnoxious rant and I should probably just go to bed.
Also, does anyone else have this problem....I love my SS more than anything and therefore I put on my best face when I'm around BM, for his sake. And I actually get annoyed with myself with how nice I am to her, even though I cannot stand her. I know it's good for SS for us all to be cordial, but I HATE how fake I act around her. It's so weird, I don't even recognize myself. Yet I tell myself it's the best option because for the two year my Bio-dad was in my life, my SM and BM fought HORRIBLY and I don't want SS to feel that struggle, but I constantly question if my "fake" attitude is any better.
OK I'm done. Sorry for wasting your time, I don't usually rant this crazy, but I've had it!!!
Oh just tell her to go fuck
Oh just tell her to go fuck off.
Haha, this made me laugh out
Haha, this made me laugh out loud.
It helps, sometimes, to get
It helps, sometimes, to get it off of your chest. Drinking helps, also!
I don't even need a full hand to count the number of times I have been in the same room with BM (in 19 years). I basically did tell her to fuck off in the very beginning, so...
Can you not be around her as often?
That's my dilemma....I've
That's my dilemma....I've copied and pasted some of my response to another comment below since it hits on the same points.
In order to do that, I have to step back from my involvement in SS's sports and school stuff. He's in several sports, and still young enough to where the parents go and watch. I also coach and/or manage a few of the teams. BM has no issue with it, but that's where the contact comes in. We get along fine on the surface, but I can't stand her (and I'm sure I'm not her favorite person either - that's just natural). A while back I got sucked into being the messenger between her and DH. They HATE each other and all of a sudden she started texting me instead of him because she said it was easier. I finally put a stop to that a month or so ago, but I'm still struggling to find the right balance. SS and I have a great relationship and asks me to come to these things, and since BM doesn't have an issue with it, I go. But I need to decide what's more do-able. Attending and participating in these activities with SS - or keeping my sanity and staying away from BM. It's a tough choice for me. I feel so fortunate to have such a great relationship with my s-kid and so many people say to enjoy it while he's young because when he gets older the SM will be at the top of the shit-list. So I'm being a little selfish and trying to enjoy it while I can, but again, then I have to deal with BM.
Ah, I see. That's where I was
Ah, I see. That's where I was lucky, my SD was not involved in ANYTHING so, no reason to be around BM.
I def. need to get there, but
I def. need to get there, but in order to do that, I have to step back from my involvement in SS's sports and school stuff. He's in several sports, and still young enough to where the parents go and watch. I also coach and/or manage a few of the teams. BM has no issue with it, but that's where the contact comes in. We get along fine on the surface, but I can't stand her (and I'm sure I'm not her favorite person either - that's just natural). A while back I got sucked into being the messenger between her and DH. They HATE each other and all of a sudden she started texting me instead of him because she said it was easier. I finally put a stop to that a month or so ago, but I'm still struggling to find the right balance. SS and I have a great relationship and asks me to come to these things, and since BM doesn't have an issue with it, I go. But I need to decide what's more do-able. Attending and participating in these activities with SS - or keeping my sanity and staying away from BM. It's a tough choice for me. I feel so fortunate to have such a great relationship with my s-kid and so many people say to enjoy it while he's young because when he gets older the SM will be at the top of the shit-list. So I'm being a little selfish and trying to enjoy it while I can, but again, then I have to deal with BM.
Oh yes you are being way too
Oh yes you are being way too nice to her. Take the fake niceness off of your face and be yourself. You cannot stand her? Let it show, either on your face or verbally. Trust me, I tried to be nice and it never worked and it only made me miserable and feeling disloyal to myself!! It IS fake. The skids know its fake anyhow. Frankly, I am having a much better time since I tell BM and the skids to f*%$# off. Well I don't use that word with the skids but I do stand up for myself now and to hell with the niceness crap. They drew First Blood as far as I am concerned. And all the niceness does not make them nice.........frankly they see "nice" and they think "weak" and go for the jugular. That's my experience anyhow. I know you have a good relationship with your SS but does that mean you have to listen to her crap? No. Go the games and continue with the coaching if it suits you. But let her know in no uncertain terms that you wont stand her crap.
Haha I feel you. It got to
Haha I feel you. It got to the point that being fake for the kid made me so sick to my stumach I made h meet her at the Winn Dixie store parking to exchange their specimen brat. I feel ya!