This was my first Thanksgiving as a step parent, and I have to say, I never want to do it again. My man's child is 4 1/2, however, due to horrible parenting (no discipline and using the TV and IPad as electronic babysitters), he is more of a 2 year old. In the last 7 months, I have taught the child to dress himself, wash his hands after he goes to the bathroom, clean up after himself and I have put him in speech therapy as he has the speaking vocabulary of a toddler. The other problem we had was that when the step son came to my house, he was accustomed to selecting his own food (which consisted of cold hot dogs, chicken nuggets, string cheese, or noodles). In my house, I cook and the children eat it. The first month was rough as dinner was accompanied by crying, temper tantrums, "jazz hands" in front of his face and an enormous amount of gagging. However, I am not a short-order cook. Things got better. And his daddy is pretty good about enforcing this. However, the child does try to negotiate with his daddy. Another thing I do not do. And sometimes this negotiation works. Therefore, our dinner-time problems will probably never be solved.
So Wednesday I spent 10 hours in the kitchen and 6 hours yesterday. This is because my man invited his whole family to Thanksgiving. And then he volunteered to work (not that I expected him to help). So after all these hours of preparing this meal for him and his family and the tables were all set we started serving up plates. His son threw several temper tantrums throughout the day and lost his video games privileges. In fact, the 11 month-old niece was better behaved throughout the day. The kids all got seated at the kids' table (including my 17, 13, and 12 year old) then the grown ups got there plates and we all started to sit. That is when my man picked up his place setting and moved his place from the head of the table to next to his son. I felt very disrespected and embarrassed. Then throughout dinner, I heard him negotiating with his son over eating "just try it" "just take a bite" and at one point I saw him feeding him. His sister was appalled and her boyfriend (a seasoned Disneyland dad) could not believe that my man would move himself from the head of the table after all the work I put into this to sit at the kids' table. And when my man was done eating he simply got up and left the table. Once everyone was done, I cleaned the kitchen, put the tables back, put all the food away, and did all the dishes. A few hours after dinner 2 of my man's friends showed up, so I got all the food back out and served them. Then I stayed up very late playing games with his family and his friends and taking care of the kids while he went in the bedroom and passed out. The night ended with his child throwing the mother of all temper tantrums when I tried to put him to bed as his daaaaaaady told him he could camp out in the game room with my teenagers instead of going to bed. However, no one told me this and my teenagers stay up late. But what does his dad care, he does not have to spend the day with a bratty 4 year old who did not get enough sleep, as he would be at work.
As a side note, his son never really ate anything. At about 8 pm he came and asked for pie. I said no because he did not eat his dinner. Daddy looked very offended. Then this morning, the child woke up starving, ate his cereal at super sonic speeds and then vomited it all over the carpet. So I did ALL the work, ALL the dishes, and cleaned up vomit this morning.
Honestly, I am not sure if I am more mad at my man or his badly behaved kid.

I hated my Thanksgiving. Not because of skids but because of BIL and annoying niece. I spent close to a hundred damn dollars that I really couldn't afford to spend (that included the meal plus all the appetizers and drinks) and my BIL had the GALL to whine because i didn't have kool-aid. :? My niece drank up all the Mountain Dew and ate all of the goddamned olives. BIL is LOUD when he drinks and niece whines like a 3 year old (she is 18.) I told DH last night while we were cleaning the kitchen that I was not doing this again next year and he agreed. Maybe it would've been not as sucky if it would have been skids instead.

On a happier note, I made crab cakes for the first time ever, and I gotta say they were not too bad.

Why Am I Doing This....I am so sorry your day sucked. What a effing drag. I'm upset for you.

((( hugs )))

Oh, I'd be furious at Dad and only Dad. And I'd be damned if I ever cooked another meal for a man who left the table.

No more extended family at our house for holidays, either. It's over rated. Next year, just me DH and our kids.

SS never bragged about his Sperm Clan at our house. But apparently he bragged about us when he was on Sperm Land visitation.

Sperm Grandma used to rant a bit about it when he was on visitation. "Your mom only has her associates degree she does not even have a bachelors much less a masters degree." Skid - "Yes Gramma, she does have her masters and she just passed the CPA exam."

The same crap would repeat when we transferred to new jobs, bought a new house, bought a new car, etc.......

After SS kept barring her ass with facts she then shifted to a new tack. "Well, we don't want to hear about what your rich step dad bought for your mom." Skid - "But Gramma, you asked what has been going on at home? Dad is not rich, he and mom just work hard, go to school, and get promotions so we can have nice stuff."

Gotta love it when an idiot bares their own ass and a kid hands them that bare ass front and center with fact. }:)

When SS would go to Sperm Land for visitation he often came home without the clothes we sent. "You don't need those name brand clothes and it is not fair that the CS we pay buys that stuff when your younger (Sibs) can't have those things." Invariably the missing shoes and clothes would show up in family pics on the younger also out of wedlock Sperm Idiot spawned half sibs by two more baby mamas. It is amazing how many countless tens of $thousands of things the $110/mo CS purchased over the years.

So, in our case the Honey Boo Boo clan is my Skid's Sperm Clan.

Girl, I am right there with you. SS's BM sends him to us in clothes that are too sizes too small, shoes with holes so we will send him home in our good clothes (i.e. ones that fit properly and shoes that don't allow his toes to stick out). She has money, obviously, not from working though - but she has enough to buy all her kids their OWN gaming systems for their rooms, smart phones for kids 9 and 7, kindle tablets for them, etc. SS sits there and tells us we aren't good enough because we don't buy him all that at our house (Hello? Who pays CS so he can have those luxuries at his moms???). Heck, we aren't even allowed to have SS cell phone number, but every aunt and uncle can!

SS came to my inlaws family thanksgiving and never said hi to his dad (Grandparents who he came with made SS say hi to him). SS never said a word to me nor said hi to his 2 year old half sibling. And Grandparents wondered why I didn't want him there. Gee, really?