My DH had the complaint that I baby my youngest, and I admit I did for a time. I'm not making excuses just saying that he is the last kid I'll ever have. I wanted the "My baby" phase to last a little longer. After taking a look at what he was saying I had to admit it to myself and have a talk with BS9(then 7) about how I did do that and it wasn't right. I stopped babying him about everything. Sometimes I feel like DH wants him to grow up to fast though. It really bothers me. I'll tell him Hey, chill out he's only 9 years old. He always comes back with Yeah, he's not 5.
So, I've been taking steps to make him less dependent on me, and he's doing a real good job.
But Monday night he came home from practice and asked me if I would mind heating up his dinner. I didn't mind, I was not busy, tired, or preoccupied. DH gets huffy and puffy about it. He starts going on and on about how I need to let him cook for himself.
He goes on and on about how all the kids need to start learning how to do for themselves and blah blah blah. Now, my oldest cooks dinner once a week, my middle is actually taking cooking class in school and has cooked for us and he enjoys it, the youngest will make his own food but I still think at 9 he should be supervised and with all of them, I'm still their mother so if I say I don't mind to do this or that then why is it such a big deal to you DH?
Here's my problem, his 9 year old, who is only two months younger than my 9 year old shouldn't have to do anything for himself. I'm supposed to do it for him, or DH, or my kids, or his older kid, his 9 year old needs to be catered to.
Me- Why? He's 9, he should be doing the same shit you think my kids should be doing right?
DH- Well, Redface is special, he needs more help.
Me- No, he's lazy and spoiled and you're using his "Issues" to let him be lazy and spoiled.
DH- Well, he does have those issues.
Me- Yeah, and it's you and BM1's fault that he's not getting help for those issues. That hardly seems fair. You want my 9 year old to do this or that because you deem him old enough even though I'M HIS PARENT but then while he's doing all this stuff Redface Magee can just sit on his ass and have everyone do every thing for him? No. You let me worry about my sons indepence and you worry about your own.
Has anyone dealt with this? I just don't think it's fair to expect one kid to do all these things while another the same age who is capable just sits around on his ass and has every thing served to him on a silver platter.