SS36 Did Not Get A Grievance Discount...OMG!
If you read my past blogs, MIL passed away. I was traveling up north to care for my mother who was having knee surgery. DH told SS36 not come as he lives in California. SS36 has plans to come home in 6 weeks. DH told SS36 he would see him in a few weeks.
SS36 came anyway. He was at the funeral when DH got there. DH told me SS36 said he did not get a grievance discount on his plane ticket. OMG!!! How tacky can you be? DH gave him $100. I asked DH...SS36 is spending the night with you. DH said...NO, SS36 has SS25's car which he feels bad about. SS25 had his wisdom teeth removed the day before the funeral. DH,SS36,SD31 and her hubby went to dinner after the funeral. I am sure DH's paid for the who bill. That is nothing new.
This is how I see. SS36 plays DH for money. We all know SS36 has a union job. Hello...I am sure he got 3 days off with pay. That is standard when you have a job with a major oil company. DH gets no paid time off, no vacation time and not even sick time. SS25 stayed home after surgery...he does not need his car back ASAP. SS25 also still lives with BM. After dinner, SS36 runs back to BM and her family on Wed. night and his plane does not leave until Friday morning.
SAD...SAD...SAD...TACKY...TACKY. I think I am reasonable person. For the love of God, I will never understand how SS36 could be show selfish and heartless. He could have least spent the night, got SS25's car back the next morning and still visit with jail bird BM and her family.
I call this a form of emotional HIT AND RUN.
Thanks for listening.
Wait- SS36 chose to use his
Wait-
SS36 chose to use his earned grievance leave to come to his Grandmothers funeral, on his own dime. He borrowed a car that wasn't being used from his brother. He went out to dinner with his Dad and siblings. Dad likely paid, as Dad's often do. Then he visited his Mom and siblings for 2 days.
What part of this is upsetting to you? This seems pretty normal to me. Except for your DH giving him the $100 toward plane fare, everything else seems completely normal.
Why do you care?
This. I'm confused too.
This. I'm confused too. Even the visit with BM's family... I mean, the guy is coming "home" in 6 weeks to see Dad anyway, right? And Dad had told him he'd just see him then?
I sort of get why you'd think DH giving him $100 was out of line, especially if there's a past history, but it's not like DH paid for the whole ticket. And you didn't see whether DH brought it up and offered, or whether SS said something like, "I tried to get a grievance discount, but they wouldn't give it to me. Would you give me the $100, Dad?" (The second would be WAY over the line. But if DH brought it up and offered, I don't really get being mad at SS for not refusing it.)
The second line would be
The second line would be correct. As normal, SS36 will comes home for a week. He will be here for one night. We will take him out to eat. I cook breakfast the next morning. Then he will spent the rest of his time with BM and her family. Most of the time he comes in, DH has to change his work schedule to see him for just one night.
I hear you and agree DH is
I hear you and agree DH is played for money. SS is 36! DH offered 100.00. I personally think good character would have told dh thanks but you don't have to do that dad. SS gets 100.00 from dh, gets free meal. Sounds like ss takes and dh does not so much as get even a little bit of ss time.
Thanks Jam DH would not think
Thanks Jam
DH would not think of grievance discount. SS36 poor mouth that info. Came in for the service and dinner, them left. What is there not to understand.
He did not spend anytime with
He did not spend anytime with his dad. That is my issue. He spent almost 100% time with BM and her family. What was the trip really about?
It was NOT BM's mother that
It was NOT BM's mother that died. I see you are NOT a SM. I understand why you are opened minded.
You need to update your
You need to update your profile....Lady. I see no need in name calling. You think you know all about my thoughts and feelings. Get Over...who died and made you GOD!
In my honest opinion, there
In my honest opinion, there is no way in any shape or form that I would defend this adult ss. First of all my biggest beef would be that I had no say "once again" with how OUR money is spent. I see a game that I will call "Drip & get" SS36 drips on dad and dad shells out the cash. OP just gets tired of the "drip & get" game and also that dh generosity is not reciprocated. It gets very old to give and give and give with nothing in return. No sincere thank you, no time for you. The only thing you get in return is "excuses".
Thanks again Jam, When BM's
Thanks again Jam,
When BM's mother died, SS was 32. DH and I had just got married. SS did not even tell him he was in the state. Later, DH got a notice that SS was 2 months behind on car note. DH was co-signer and co-owner for his truck. That was the second time in 7 months...DH got a call about late payments. First one was when DH and I was dating and DH paid that note. We spent 4K this April for SS wedding rehearsal dinner and expenses for the trip.
DH does make good money. His company does NOT pay grievance pay, sick pay or vacation time. SS and his bride lived together as a married couple for at least 5 years before they married. They had a BIG wedding and went to Italy for a honeymoon. They bought a house for 430K just before they married. I am sure the bride's daddy gave for the down payment.
SS is a gold digger in my book.
Thanks StepAside, SS is a
Thanks StepAside,
SS is a grown man. $100 is not that much money. He used the issue of no grievance discount as bait for money. DH is too much of a Disney Dad to see it. I am sure DH would have paid for the whole ticket, if we had not spent 4k on SS's wedding just this April. DH's favors him. I do not understand. He is the oldest of 3 and worst about feeling entitled. He told DH he would pay back $3500 he owes him. We will never see that.