Double Standard!!
I feel for my DH. When he first got the signed CO with Inbred she followed it to the T. Not so much any more, there have been plenty of times he's shown up to get them and she never shows. He'll drive to her house and of course they are gone. It breaks his heart when he doesn't get to see his kids.
I was thinking earlier surely there has to be some type of law that prevents mothers from doing this. I looked and looked and nope, there's nothing. I thought to myself how shitty is this system. The state will take money right out of the boi dads check and hand it over to the mother with out any questions or concerns for the fathers wellfare, but would they dare tell the mother she has to hand over the kids?
If a man violates the CO and doesn't pay his CS he goes to jail, why doesn't the same appy to the mother who violates the CO and PAS the kids and then refuses visitation when ever she feels like it? Why do fathers have no rights when it comes to their children?
This isn't a double standard.
This isn't a double standard. :?
She's ignoring the CO. He has to take the necessary steps to file contempt against her. He's making the choice not to do so.
ExDF's BM pulled this on him last summer. When she refused to give him the girls, he called the police. When they arrived, they read the CO, made BM hand over the kids and they also filled out a police report. He can take the police report to family court and hit BM with contempt.
Father's have rights. They just have to be willing to exercise those rights.
agree with this. bm scared
agree with this. bm scared the pants off dh by threatening him hed never see the skids again if he got a lawyer. then she took the skids out of state. the divorce went uncontested and bm go everything she wanted.
dh lost his balls over the skids.
THIS
THIS
If Dad can't be bothered to
If Dad can't be bothered to educate himself, make sure the order is specific (he could have filed for clarification to make the order more specific), document and file for contempt - he (and you) have no one to blame but himself. This isn't a matter of a double standard - it's one of a lazy parent.
IF the NCP takes the
IF the NCP takes the necessary steps to hold a CP in contempt, the courts will take actions.
That's the problem right
That's the problem right there, the police where she lives will not help DH, they won't even file a report for him. It's a small little town and the police are friends with Inbreds mom, when he called the police to enforce the court order the officer said it wasn't a police matter and he would not tell her to hand over the kids. When he tried to file a report the police officer wouldn't come in to take it and told him again it was not a police matter and to not bother him again. He went to another police station in the next town and filed a report but the judges office won't accept it since it's not in their juristiction. He's tried filing contemp charges, but with no help from police she goes in and say..no he just didn't show up..and court keeps siding with her.
I know quite a few men who
I know quite a few men who have had positive results - including having custody reversed.
THIS The men I know who
THIS
The men I know who complain about the system being pro mom, are men who were too lazy to deal with BM head on. The ones who had the balls to hold their BMs accountable, all had favorable outcomes.
Also, Dad could stop at a
Also, Dad could stop at a nearby convenience store, buy something and keep the receipt to help show he WAS there, He could bring a third party (not you would be best, as you will be considered biased) to call as a witness.
The cops are right - it is NOT a police matter. It's a civil issue, not a criminal one.
He needs to learn the right way to go about it.
They won't even take a
They won't even take a report. Each time he shows up to get them, the police station is closed. I'm serious, I didn't believe him either and went and yep, there was sign on the door that said the police station was closed, for emergencies call #######
He called and one of the three police officers at that station answers and says well this isn't an emergency, it isn't a police matter, don't call again. He's gone to the next town over and filed a complaint and nothing has helped. He's tried to file contempt of court charges and the courts always tell him he needs police reports saying he showed up and she didn't. Since the police won't come out there to take the complaint he's right back to where he started from. Usually it's only once a month, but she's starting to do it more often now that she knows she'll get away with it.
So file a change of venue,
So file a change of venue, take the case to a neighboring county, then get a GaL, and email them when you go pick up the kids. "Hey, at BMs house, see attached picture of BMs house with today's newspaper. BM is refusing to allow me visitation, and to avoid conflict I am returning home." -- with the change of venue, file a petition to modify the PPP/visitation order, to specify a time and place where BM must be to exchange the kids, unless prior arrangements are made via email at least 48 hours ahead of scheduled visitation.
If she wants to play hard ball, your DH needs to be the umpire, not a minor league team trying to play in the majors. To the LETTER of the court order. I also keep a daily journal regarding contact with BM and SD, my DH won't do it, but it has saved his ass a few times when BM decided to recant.
OMG...I feel like a complete
OMG...I feel like a complete idiot now. This never crossed our minds but I actually think this could work out well. Thank you.