BM wants my DH to pay half the cost of her hospital bills
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BM is asking for DH to pay 50% of the out of pocket expenses from the birth of SS. He is a year and a half old now. Has anyone else been through this? Was your DH ordered to pay? They are going back to court soon to work out time sharing and a visiting plan and to get child support reduced and she added this to her counter petition!
You should look into your
You should look into your state laws. Depending on the state if she was on any type of state medical insurance then he could be liable for the entire amount. The state won't screw around and will take it from pay. Half of non the unpaid sounds more then generous
She wasn't on state insurance
She wasn't on state insurance at the time. Her insurance just didn't have the best coverage I guess. DH will chat with the lawyer soon about it. I've tried looking it up but haven't found anything definite
They were together for half
They were together for half the pregnancy. She does have old texts from DH agreeing to help pay and that he wanted to help so that is her arguing point. Even if she drops the maternity portion, she still wants him to help pay for the Nursery charges for the baby, the Pediatrician visit at the hospital and one other bill related to the "baby" and not necessarily her alone.
No, never married but in a
No, never married but in a long term relationship. I'm not sure what the texts say and she probably wouldn't show us if he asked until court. DH can't remember exactly what was said either as it was over a year and a half ago, but he did say he remembers agreeing a few times and we know she has a lot of texts saved. luckily it's not too much money, but enough just to annoy me.
Her request for the child's
Her request for the child's portion of the birth are indeed reasonable. First he offers to help with entire cost, but doesn't. Now he whines he may have to help with his child's portion?
I'm curious. Why does he feel he should pay nothing towards the out of pocket cost of the birth of his child? I'm, betting BM's insurance paid for whatever lousy policy she had toward her personal cost, but insurance was not on the actual child , so yes, nursery, peds visits, ect. Even if the child was covered immediately after birth, the out of pocket non-paid part of SS's care are as much of your DH's responsibility as it is BM? How do you figure it is not?
No, we aren't whining or
No, we aren't whining or complaining. I mean, he would rather not pay it if the says its not his responsibility, but I was just trying to see if anyone has dealt with this before and what the outcome was. It's not that we are mad she is asking for the money, it's that it almost feels like she is doing it to "get back at DH" for taking her back to court, so it's just annoying. I do not know the context in which DH agreed or even when he agreed. He pays quite a bit of money for CS already and bills are hard to cover, can't blame him for not just handing over money and making sure he is obligated first. I appreciate you input and point of view though.
While states may differ in
While states may differ in their attitudes and guidelines on 'obligated/responsible', I do know my SS paid four years of back funding for SGS...going right back to the moment of birth and all child's medical birthing cost. It wasn't optional. It was thousands of dollars and the agreement was his tax return every year would be entirely snagged until amount repaid in full.
There was also CS coming directly out of his paycheck, mandated health insurance coverage for the child and the usual assortment of spilt extras between the birth mother and SS. SGS was the result of a very brief (a few one night stands)affair between BM and SS. SGS was four years old when SS discovered the child was his.
To answer your other
To answer your other question, I do not really have an opinion and I'm not sure how I feel about a man paying part of the childs birth. My DH has his own opinions which are "womans choice, woman's body, woman's money" for everything up to and including the birth of a child. Not saying I agree, but that's how he feels.
My DH has his own opinions
My DH has his own opinions which are "womans choice, woman's body, woman's money" for everything up to and including the birth of a child.
:jawdrop:
Unless he's claiming he was raped, he had a choice too.... To paraphrase another poster around here, "Don't stick your dick in someone you don't want to have a kid with. Let her give you a blow job instead."
Same applies to women who use
Same applies to women who use the "it's my body" to decide whether or not they want or "are ready" to be a mother. Fathers should be allowed to decide whether or not they "are ready" to be a father then. It's only fair
I would def see what the
I would def see what the lawyer says.
Hahahahaha!!! Not
Hahahahaha!!! Not likely.
1.5 years after the birth of the SKid is a little late to be pushing for him to pay half of her brooding fees if she has not been sending him regular requests for payment..
And yes, our CO clearly says that DickHead has to pay half of all Skid related medical costs not covered by insurance.
He never has paid any of those costs including for the Skid's birth. He now owes us more than $10K including penalties and interest on the 22yo delivery costs for the Skid. We just keep sending him the statement including additional accrued interest and penalties each quarter to keep our ability to drag his ass back to court alive so we can beat his ass one more time when he steps over the line in his attempts to extort money from my SKid to help raise the three younger also out of wedlock SpermIdiot spawned half sibs.
Every few years he calls to cry about being kept on the hook for the Skid related medical costs. My bride just laughs at him, tells him to grow up, and send the check or keep seeing the number grow, and grow, and grow. The judge has already ordered him to pay it a few different times. He just cries and whines and then hopes we forget about it. When we do finally nail his ass to the wall for the money it will be in conjunction with a contempt motion for failure to comply with repeated orders to pay. }:) }:) }:)
Wow, that sounds terrible!
Wow, that sounds terrible! No help at all and no punishment for not helping! My DH pays his child support and is involved, this is just an extra expense he would rather not get stuck with. BM has sent requests, but not regular ones. I know he agreed, but she is very manipulative and he should have never agreed.
When will you take him back to court? Has he been in jail yet for failure to pay?
IMHO he should just pay it.
IMHO he should just pay it. He said he'd help her. They both created this child.
He needs to address these types of issues in the upcoming child support/visitation modification.
It's HIS KID TOO. I would
It's HIS KID TOO. I would hope to God he would WANT to pay. And I sure as hell wouldn't stay with a POS that didn't want to help pay for his child's birth.
Red flag, OP. How he's treating BM now? That's what is in store for YOU when you are no longer shiny and new.
I've had friends (back in the
I've had friends (back in the day of high school births) who had to pay 1/2 mother and baby medical bills but only when the mother was on state aid/medicaid...
Private insurance rulings could be different...
BM also told DH he is
BM also told DH he is responsible for accrued Skids bills totaling $5000. However, he has paid for the car she drove for 15 months following the divorce as well as insurance for said car and taxes. Furthermore he paid her rent to the tune of $800 a month for five months following the divorce and has paid ALL of skids medical since the divorce, never seeing a dime for her half which she is court ordered to pay. If say they're even