This morning's drama!
DH tells me last night at 11:00 pm that he needs to be up earlier to take SheSloth to school by 6:30 am so that the guard can do makeup for a pep rally that starts at 9:45 am! I tell him that is total BS, but whatever. He then starts with the comparison to the bios again..."You never questioned when BS19 needed to be at school early!" I tell him, "First of all, BS19's schedule didn't flip flop with a billion last minute changes for this and that...it was consistent every single week as outlined by the coaches at the beginning of the season! Second, he NEVER had to be at school before 7:00 am, and that was ONLY 7th grade, because the 7th grade football team had athletics 1st period, and 8th grade 7th period (so 7th grade practiced before school, and 8th grade practiced after school). In high school, if he went in early, it was on his own...getting a ride from a friend until he got his own car, because he wanted to go lift and it was the only place he had to do it!" SheSloth has guard first period, the pep rally is second period...so you can't tell me that it takes the girls 3 freakin' hours to do makeup for a pep rally!
So, I wake up earlier, because there are two ways of DH getting up...me waking up to my alarm, which gently wakes me through a gentle vibration of my wrist, to kick him out of bed, or me being bolted out of bed by DH's alarm because he has to have it loud and jolting or he sleeps through it! Me waking up to my alarm is far better for my health...trust me! I peek out the door...no lights from SheSloth's room...she was supposed to get herself up. DH makes an excuse that she probably didn't know how to set an alarm on her new phone and crap, and goes to get her up. Guess what...SheSloth can't find her black leggings...the leggings that she didn't even bother to try to find until this morning in the disaster that is in her room! She starts getting all snippy with DH...as if it is his fault that she can't find them and she waited until the last minute to look for them! So, then the arguing starts, and doesn't stop until they are both out the door, which is slammed behind them! Good thing I was up to head to the gym anyway. Trust me, even if I were still trying to sleep, the loud arguing would have still happened, because no one cares if I'm trying to sleep or not...obvious around here.
I'm sure the arguing happened all the way to school. Seemed to be a continuation of last night. At least I get the peace and quite of my home to myself today, until we have to go to the game later. I don't really want to go, but I'm being drug by DH. My son is not playing any longer...I have no interest in going. I guess I can cheer for his one friend that is still behind (was the baby in their group last year...he was the only junior among a bunch of seniors). Which reminds me, I better charge MY video camera, because SheSloth last night was all, "You are going to take pictures and film me, right?" If I don't bring the camera to let DH film his dear princess, I'll NEVER hear the end of it!
i would not go to the game.
i would not go to the game. seriously. this is your chance to truly disengage.
I did tell my friend (my
I did tell my friend (my son's friend's mom) that I would probably be at home games a bit and will help cheer her son on. SheSloth knows I'm not going for her. I have half a mind to get a shirt made with my friend's son's number on it to wear on Friday's. The mom of one of my son's best-friend did that last year...her son was a trainer, so she wore a shirt with my son's number on it all season. But I can promise you...hell no on away games! Just waiting for DH to revise history on that one, too. "Well, when BD23 was in band..." Um, I didn't go to away games when she was in band (and DH barely made 1-2 games at all)! And the MAIN reason I went to every away game when BS19 was in football? Football can be a brutal sport...I've seen some pretty serious injuries over the 6 years BS19 was in football...thankfully none of them being my son's. I wasn't about to be stuck here at home while he was some 100 miles away when I get a call that my son is being rushed to a hospital because of an injury on the field!
Oh trust me, I would like to
Oh trust me, I would like to not be able to find it or something. Of course, DH would know that is not like me. I'll let him film his little princess, so I don't have to here it. It gives them something to do all day Saturday, because SheSloth will want to see herself. I'll go to the gym and try to drum up some business for myself...LOL.
Ever here of this motto "
Ever here of this motto " Proper planning prevents poor performance"~ that was beat into my brain by teachers.
If Shesloth organized herself the night before n out out her needed clothes for the next day. She will not have full fledged bs hairy canary in the morning. No one likes being scatter brain when their in a rush.
Let's see ~
I find it hard to believe that Shesloth doesn't know how to use every little function on her phone , kids these days teach us about electronics so I call bullshit on her.
DH should have located camera on his ism n charged it up if what he wanted it to film Shesloth. I think he is depending on you to help him ~ he is a big boy. If it is important enough he will do. It's not your job.
Just like Shesloth needs to buck up if she wants things ~ the procrastation in your house would drive me bat shit crazy. It's one thing if things are a new schedule n your learning but this shit is just a recurring ground hog day ~ day after day. Hop off the crazy train.
DH depends on you. N Shesloth depends on DH. I believe the umbilical cord was cut at birth. She needs to start becoming a function teenager. The telling in the morning would set me off for the day.
It's my camera...I bought it
It's my camera...I bought it when trying to get BS19 into college playing ball (which I obviously did very well). You have to submit a lot of film to get seen these days...recruiting is very technical. I'm actually thinking I may be able to enjoy the game tonight cheering my son's friend, as I won't have a camera glued to my face, and I know I don't have to spend hours tomorrow going through game film...LOL! I am finally freeeeeeeeeee...LOL! But yeah, he has no clue where I keep the camera! There is a reason for that, as my camera equipment is very important to me. I don't let anyone just use it, and DH knows this. He knows if he wants to film SheSloth, I have to be going to the game, because I will not simply let him take the camera. He might do something stupid like let SheSloth come get it from him to go show the video to all her little guardies! Next think I know, the screen is ripped off of it, or the lense cover is bent and won't function right, or some stupidity like that. He trusts her way too much with things. I cringe every time he lets her use his DSLR, because I'm just waiting for it to hit the ground or something.
But yes, DH has had the conversation with SheSloth many, many, many, many times about preparation. Here recently, it has been nearly a weekly conversation. I'm sure she is just tuning him out, and not paying attention to a thing he is saying, because she is going to do it all her way, anyway! I'm actually shocked that she didn't ask for leggings last night at the store so she wouldn't have to look for them! She's pulled that one before!
Damn I'd go ape shit in your
Damn I'd go ape shit in your house ~ or start drinking at 630am.
as we all well know, teh
as we all well know, teh discussions arent sinking in with her, because everytime she has a last minute request she is rewarded with one of you scrambling to go to the store, find a ride, etc.
once she starts missing out on things or not having the proper clothes/items, then she'll start planning.
Yea ~ how bout not waking her
Yea ~ how bout not waking her up ~ her responsibility. If she wants it bad enough she'd get it done. If there's a will there is a way.
Push it back on her. Dad feels responsible that it is his job to drive her in early ~ yes. He should not be her punching bag.
I wouldn't drive her anywhere if she was freakin out ~ f that. Show some respect. If you hubby is expecting something different when she isn't changing anything that's pure insanity.
That was the funny part of
That was the funny part of this morning! DH asked if SheSloth was up, and I told him, "Doesn't appear so. Looked out the door and no lights from her room." He asked, "Did you get her up?" Told him "nope" as I went on with my stuff! He had to get her up, which was about 20 minutes past when she should have been up to be ready to leave when she was supposed to. Probably another reason for the fit...SheSloth doesn't like being "rushed". Of course, her definition of "rushed" is not having at least twice the time everyone else needs to do the exact same stuff at a normal pace. She considers an hour on Sunday morning to dress, put on makeup, brush hair and teeth, and put on shoes to be rushed, when I can shower, dry and straighten my thick curly hair, put on makeup, dress and put on shoes, brush teeth, tend to the dogs, AND pull my music for praise team in the same hour.
Girl has some serious time management problems, and issues managing priorities! What set DH off last night was the whole thing with the rifle. He specifically told SheSloth to CALL the friend who's car the rifle was in and figure out how to get it, but instead SheSloth texted her, and then went back to trying to get all of her phone numbers back on to her new phone! DH asked what the plan was, and her response was, "I haven't texted her back yet!" If it were me? I would have said, "Sorry, if it isn't that important to you, then I'm not going out of my way to help you get your rifle tonight. Guess you are just going to have to go out on the field without it tomorrow!"
Yeap ~ catering to her every
Yeap ~ catering to her every whim is ridiculous. You have to remind 5 year olds ~ after 10 they should be able to get up on their own.
Your DH is the major problem ~ never fully holds her responsible ~ half heartedly cause he is their to clean up. He is now dubbed " The Cleaner" ~
Oh and by the way ~ Get the
Oh and by the way ~ Get the shirt made. Love the idea.
Just had to jab him with that
Just had to jab him with that BS remark. Are you trying to goad him into leaving or just another woman on the side?
what remark did you find BS?
what remark did you find BS?
I'm wondering the same thing.
I'm wondering the same thing. Talking about me saying it was BS that SheSloth was claiming she needed to be at school at 6:30 am to do makeup for a pep rally 3 hours later? SheSloth has nothing but guard until the pep rally...like I said, guard is first period, the pep rally is second period, so they would have PLENTY of time to do makeup going to school at their normal "practice" time of 7:30 am (first bell rings at 8:45 am). It's BS because SheSloth can tell DH ANYTHING now, and he will just follow along...follow right along until she is pregnant because she has realized she can claim "it's for guard" and DH will NEVER question it! Like last year, he really needs to get with the band director and guard coach and get from them a real schedule, so he can call BS when it is due, because I think she is lying about the whole makeup crap!
The best predictor of present
The best predictor of present and future action is past behavior. If she is so untrustworthy that her guard makeup scenario is obviously bullshit then the default has to be that anything she does that does not pass your smell sense honed by her past behaviors is extremely suspect.
It took a few years for my Skid to realize that once he lied at all then anything he had to say had to be considered a lie until proven otherwise. It took a long time before his mom or I could trust that he would tell us the truth when he was progressing through his teens. One thing we did was to stop asking him direct questions. It was too easy for him to immediately and apparently mindlessly spout what he thought we wanted to hear rather than the truth. So we started instructing him to tell us rather than asking him questions. "Tell us about this XYZLMNOP. What is happening, when does it start, etc....." Kids rarely plan any detail in to their bullshit so not giving them the direct easily lied about question usually helps prevent the lie in the first place.
Good luck with this. I know how infuriating it can be.
You hit the nail right on the
You hit the nail right on the head there! SheSloth has lied about so much crap, I find it really difficult to believe anything that comes from her mouth!
Lol! I get it. One of the
Lol! I get it. One of the funniest things my Skid used to say was "But I am not lying this time!!!" I would laugh my ass off in his face when he dropped that line. }:)
My laughter and ridicule of his honesty, actually lack of it, used to drive him insane. He finally got a clue though and did come to the realization that if he lied to us at all everything he said had to be considered a lie. He would get mad and accuse me of disrespecting him. I would tell him that I was not disrespecting him and that he was disrespecting himself by being a liar. And ... that I could not disrespect anyone who I had no respect for. Respect is earned with honesty and trustworthiness.
Good luck with this. SS is now 22 and we are long past this stage of parenting. He is doing very well on his own and his mom and I are proud of him. Interestingly, rather than put himself in a position of having to lie to us these days he just fails to communicate. He will go months without calling, emailing etc.... He finds that easier than having to tell us something he knows will be disappointing or having to struggle with lying and maintaining that story for the long term.
Good luck.
"SheSloth can't find her
"SheSloth can't find her black leggings...the leggings that she didn't even bother to try to find until this morning in the disaster that is in her room! She starts getting all snippy with DH...as if it is his fault that she can't find them and she waited until the last minute to look for them!"
If Daddy doesn't require her to keep a neat room, it IS his fault. If he has never taught her preparation, then that is his fault as well. A lot of times we have expectations for kids who have never been taught the appropriate skills/behavior. Good Lord, my daughter is 11 and I have figured out that if I don't make her clean her room each day, WE will be running late for something because she won't find anything she needs. So it's my job to make her aware of this problem and how to fix it. Not to mention, we had mice coming in from the garage at our last house because there were so many great nesting areas for them in her room. Kids WANT to be taught right. They WANT to be held accountable and not just expected to do what we would do. My son LOVES playing on the computer all day, but he loves even more when I make him stop and do something else, because HE didn't have the self-control to do it himself. My daughter can have soccer, cheer, dance, homeschool co-op, and other stuff all in one week, and if I didn't make sure she cleaned her room, we would never get out the door.
Totally agree! He only
Totally agree! He only recently started trying to get her to think ahead, but now she is 15, and it is an uphill battle! Of course, she will think ahead if she wants something...like...let's say...a homecoming mum! Yeah...all that crap yesterday about homecoming being 9/12, and the mum has to be done NOW, and MIL offering to buy the stuff to make the mum. We go to both stores today...Hobby Lobby and Michael's (because one has the better decorations, but doesn't have the right color backer), and guess what? Both stores had lists of when the various homecomings in the area are! The call each school every year and get dates so they know how to plan their ordering. Hmmmm...BOTH stores show homecoming for out school as 10/24! DH asked SheSloth what gave her the idea that 9/12 was homecoming (as we could not find in the school we site when the date was). SheSloth said, "I thought I heard someone say it was 9/12." Ugh!!! MIL got all the stuff anyway, as my niece's is sooner, and the trip already had to be made for hers. Guess that means I have plenty of time to teach DH how to use the glue gun so he can make the princess' mum when she starts bugging every day when it will get done (which I expect will start next week)!
I thought that sounded way
I thought that sounded way early! Gosh she's as crazy as my SD19 and SD13 lol.