Golden Eggs are gracing us with their presence!!!
DH found out last night that 2 out of state golden eggs (SS38 and SD29) have been in town since Friday (3 days ago) and neither one of them have called DH to say “hey Dad we’re in town” or graced us with their arrival. Yes, DH is hurt, but I'm staying out of it!
On that note, because DH knows they’re in town, DH wants to put our week’s scheduled plans on hold “just in case they come over!” I just gave DH one of my best “I love you but I don’t think f**kin’ so” looks, and I truly believe he got the message. But this girl isn’t stupid anymore – I know things will change! So I am saving up all my yard, garden, and in-house projects so I have something to keep my mind busy instead of focusing on the royalty when they come.
In the past, I would have cleaned house, bought groceries, cooked meals, and kissed their feet whenever they arrived. Now, I just make sure I have beer in the fridge and a TV dinner in the freezer for me.
Sorry, DH, you’re on your own for this “royal” visit! I haven’t forgotten the 13 years of being pissed on by these golden eggs and you keeping your mouth shut.
Thanks for letting me vent!
I say have a Munsters
I say have a Munsters Marathon. Eight straight hours of glorious black and white comedy from the 1960's. That should send the golden eggs rolling out the door.
Thanks Think but black and
Thanks Think but black and white doesn't come on until midnight and I'll be damn if I want them here at that time!!!
I don't have to worry about
I don't have to worry about DH checking his phone every 2 minutes - most of the time he doesn't know where it is! lol. SOmetimes that's a good thing (like now) and other times I get so pissed!
'toywas' you're on the right
'toywas' you're on the right track. Let Daddy Big Bucks buy all the fixings and do all the work.
Thanks, Orange, truthfully I
Thanks, Orange, truthfully I have neglected my house since we have been doing nothing but canning and more canning, and more damn weeding! Our 2 gardens have taken off tremendously this year and we have more produce coming out of our ass; we're giving it away if we can't can it!
As far as I'm concerned, I'm hoping DH does what he did at Christmas - let them eat 5 lbs of nuts (yes you're correct, I didn't grocery shop or cook!)
Let them have a replay of a
Let them have a replay of a nut dinner. LOL You are doing the right thing. Please let us know what happens.
DH just mentioned about
DH just mentioned about thawing out a ham for "when they come to visit!" I said no! End of discussion and opened another beer!
Why can't he understand that I no longer cook for assholes that treat me like shit???
Toywas, You do not owe it to
Toywas, You do not owe it to your DH to accommodate people who have treated you like crap. What would happen if he asked THEM to bring the food? Ya, I already know the answer to that one!
I know that sandy! I/we
I know that sandy! I/we asked all of the golden eggs to bring dishes at Christmas time; some did and some ended up using OUR food to make their dish - they're too stupid to realize the point/issue!
I am NOT thawing out a ham nor am I grocery shopping nor am I cooking for a bunch of selfish assholes that have treat me like crap for 13 years!!! In fact, I cooked a breakfast for dinner tonight; DH is starting to question my motives! lol
Nuts for the eggs! It sounds
Nuts for the eggs! It sounds like you have a beautiful garden; enjoy it. I like the idea of saving up things to do when they arrive so you don't have to subject yourself to their nonsense. What type of foods do you can? It sounds like fun. Well, I hope the weather is nice where you're at. My DH said there were thunderstorms in Michigan this time of year (I love thunderstorms but I live on the west coast so we don't get them here).
I think that's really mean for the 2 out of state eggs to roll into town and not call their dad. It's even more mean for him to find out they have been there for 3 whole days and they couldn't even take 10 seconds to send a text? I don't understand why he would be willing to put your weekend plans on hold after his adult brats treat him with such cruelty and disrespect. It would be one thing if it was an unplanned visit, if they called him the day they came to town and asked if they could plan some time to spend with him. While annoying because they mistreat you, I could see your DH asking you if you don't mind it if he takes a few hours to spend with his spawn. What is this ridiculousness about thawing a ham for these ingrates that didn't even have the common decency to call? I wouldn't even have a box of cereal available for them. So, your DH is going to wait around all weekend for the eggs to "roll in" and they haven't even committed to a time for a visit? What if he ends up sitting around waiting for them and they never even call or drop by? Sounds like a waste of ham to me. The rudeness and entitlement in this case is disgusting. I wouldn't wait around for my kids if they treated me like this. This is why they treat him like this; because they know in his eyes that they can do no wrong and they treat him like a damn doormat. Then if he's like my DH used to be, he will pout and be sad when he's ignored and they don't come. DH used to do this with his precious psycho-brat. He would make little private plans with psycho and wouldn't tell me until the last minute. Then psycho would break the plans and daddy would feel bad. Of course even though princess was receiving thousands upon thousands of dollars from daddy to subsidize her fancy lifestyle, she would still treat him like this (the subsidies were given before we lived together. He cut the bitch off when he figured out that she was lying about going to school and was doing lots of drugs). It makes me sad to see my DH hurt. He doesn't deserve it. Princess doesn't deserve him as a father. It sounds like the golden eggs don't deserve your DH as well.
Try and enjoy your weekend. Be scarce when the royalty arrives. Enjoy your ice cold beer and garden.
Amber
Great to hear from you! Beer
Great to hear from you!
Beer and garden - great!
Your response - better!
You too! I read about how
You too! I read about how well things went. I am very happy for you but like you said, remain guarded. Take care my friend.
Yes but Cat is right, they do
Yes but Cat is right, they do gradually come to terms with the hurt over the years. My DH and I were just discussing tonight how we would care for our ailing parents when it came to the real end of their lives, then got on to what would happen to ourselves if one predeceased the other. I made some remarks about how our bios would cope and what they would likely do to care for us and then I accidentally referred to the skids negatively by saying that DH could only be expecting YSD to care for him if I had predeceased him. I did not mention the other 2 but clearly the implication was that they would not do anything supportive. Instead of leaping to their defense like he would have up to about 6 months ago, DH said nothing and looked to be in neutral agreement with me. Yet this is a guy who would crawl along the floor and disembowel himself to please them.
Fantastic arrangement Cat.
Fantastic arrangement Cat.
I tried but was unable to
I tried but was unable to post an update so here it is!
Trust me, I had my guard up wondering what kind of shit they were going to pull this time (and it’s NOT even Christmas!) Yesterday, SS38 and fiancee came to visit very early in the morning right after we woke up. They just came from the Golden Goose’s house (who by the way did not cook breakfast) and DH didn’t offer to cook either (Shock #1). For the 4 hours they were here, it was a very good visit. We laughed, talked, they even brought their dog (NOT IN THE HOUSE) so we ended up taking all the dogs for a 3 mile walk. We even hugged when they left (Shock #2).
A friend dropped SD29 at our house yesterday afternoon while we were working in the garden. She helped us pick vegetables, feed and water the animals, played cards, had dinner, and surprisingly, another very good visit (Shock #3).
Last night I came to the conclusion that both visits with the golden eggs were somewhat pleasant since they were INDIVIDUAL visits and not as a group/herd. DH and I were able to talk one-on-one, we laughed, they even noticed all of our house and yard improvements, and no mention of “how DH didn’t buy/do this for the Golden Goose” . Of course, the Golden Goose kept calling and you know how cell phone calls are – loud and you can hear the other person talking; not a happy Goose to know her kids were here.
Sadly, no matter how good these visits were or how happy DH is right now, I am still not letting my guard down! I can’t put my finger on it but something just doesn’t seem right; I guess only time will tell.
PS - NO THAWING OF HAM!!! lol
gang mentality - great words.
gang mentality - great words. I could only come up with "herd!" lol
Toywas, Glad to hear
Toywas, Glad to hear everything went well. Very strange that BM would be calling constantly. She sounds very threatened that he 'subjects' might defect. It makes one wonder if some of their nastiness has been encouraged by BM.
You wrote something doesn't seem quite right. You can give them as bit of slack but you still don't have to fully engage with them or let your guard down. As long as they are respectful and polite, return the sentiments, but be prepared. At the first sign of past bad behavior put a stop to it.
The first time I disengaged from SD I didn't see her for a few years. Then one day DH said they were coming over and assured me she would be respectful - and she was. But it was no time at all until she was back to her old obnoxious self, and even got worse. I've learned a lesson from being on this site for 3 1/2 years. If SD were to ever to visit my home again, first she would be informed by DH - in my presence - that she is to respect me as his wife. I would communicate with her as long as she was pleasant. But any sign of past behavior and she would be immediately put on notice to cease or leave.
I guess you can say the rule
I guess you can say the rule of thumb these past 15 years has been - BM would either call constantly and talk to all the SKs or she would drive over and either pick up and drop off the ADULT SKs.
I can't explain this one!