Wow, where to begin. I've found this site and hope that some of you have advice or just some support for me. I married a man about 16 years ago who has one daughter. She actually went to high school with my daughter, so they were "friends" when my husband and I met. They were about 20 years old at the time. Since then, my daughter has finished college, has a great job and bought her own house last year. Then there's the sd. When my dh and I married she had one child - a toddler. No husband. Then she started running around with a guy and took off with him to another state with her daughter - and then, of course, ended up pregnant with his child - but left him shortly after finding out. So then she had two kids. She moved again to yet another state and met up with a friend of a friend - and married him. Called us a few weeks/months later to tell us that she was married. Turns out - this is a great guy! He's got a high security clearance with the US Government and makes good money. They bought a house and she has had two children with him. Now there are 4 kids with 3 different men. This is all abbreviated so far - but here comes the punch - she is a hypochondriac and drove herself or her kids to the doctor or the hospital at least 2-4 times a month. She finally got a doctor (quack) to agree that she has fibromyalgia and that she needs to be on drugs! Go figure. So...she started that up and her husband was deeply upset about her drug use and tried to put a stop to it, so the sd started making up abuse stories about him and calling the police and putting a restraining order on him. Once she got him out of the house, she had her 17 year old lover (yes, she's 37) move in, and guess what - the state they live in allows pot smoking - so now she got her doctor to allow her to get a medical marijuana license. So she sits around the house all day stoned, making up stories about her husband - who is now her ex-husband - and now claims that she is "common law" married to this now 19-year old boyfriend. She "can't" work because she's in so much pain all the time and so lives in a basement apartment someplace with her 4 kids sleeping on the floor. In the meantime, her ex-husband - who we absolutely adore and feel so badly about - lost his high security clearance because of the lies and claims she made about him.

This has been just a horror story for both her father and me. She calls and tells us lie upon lie upon lie and everything is all about her and how poor she is and what a great mom she is, etc. etc. Her father does not know how to turn her off. I don't answer the phone or talk to her at all any more. He just sits and listens, says ah huh a few times and then says Ok, love you, bye. So I get upset because he is NOT being honest with her. He is just as disgusted with her behavior as I am, but just can't tell her how disappointed in her he is. I refuse to send her any money. She has made her choices and now has to live with them - I'm not supporting her lifestyle. We do send gifts, etc. to the children, but never any money or anything she can use to get her drugs with.

There is so much more to the story, but I really am at a point now where I no longer want her to call us, or anything. Every time she does, I get upset, my husband gets upset, and it has a negative impact on our relationship. What do I do? I have absolutely no respect for this girl, and I don't care if I never see her again. I'm not sure that is a healthy feeling to have when I'm married to her father. Ugh.

Anyway....thanks for at least letting me vent. I don't talk about this to anyone in my family or any of my friends. It is just too embarrassing and ugly.