No legacy and SD7 is it….. Say it's not so!
:O
Maybe this is the wrong site for this…. but….
So after 2 years of so much work and trying to make my own damn legacy… it's a big NO GO. I'm looking at a 20,000 bill for IVF if it's something I really want to do and I'm not sure I'm in to all that. Here is the kicker… BM lied to my husband and my stupid husband "had relations," after she told him she wasn't able to have any more children. LOL! After her last two had two different baby daddies. My dumb husband followed his "lower region," to a decision that makes me pray every day doesn't kill my marriage. So after knowing the hoe two weeks the hoe gets knocked up.
Yeah, yeah, I knew SD existed before I married him, but it didn't bother me the way it does until I felt like I needed to create a family and a legacy.
So here I am… running a huge company that I love and own. I have accomplished everything I set out to do and more, faster and better than I could have imagined and it's looking like SD is all I will leave behind. She's horrible too… did I mention that. She smells like swamp, looks unkept, never brushes her teeth and generally has no respect for anything. I know it's not her fault and BM is horrifying and her daughter is just like her. We do our best on our weekends, but it's not doing much good.
Not the point… I get that the traditional family is garbage these days and does not exist, but I feel like I pay for my stupid husband's slutty days. It's not like I didn't have my own years of poor choices but I made damn sure that my real life and health were covered!
I get so much selfish and grumpy here and it's not SD's fault and you knew what you married….blah blah blah… does not make me like it right now….
"Not the point… I get that
"Not the point… I get that the traditional family is garbage these days and does not exist, but I feel like I pay for my stupid husband's slutty days. It's not like I didn't have my own years of poor choices but I made damn sure that my real life and health were covered!"
I feel like this sometimes too. -hugs-. It'll pass.
Thanks! IT will pass…. but
Thanks! IT will pass…. but it WILL be back! Damn it!
Yeah. I honestly have to take
Yeah. I honestly have to take a minute & meditate sometimes to get over it.
I know a few couples that had success with IVF. If it's something you feel like you'll regret not trying, I'd say it's worth the money. Most people don't get old & gray & regret trying something. They regret NOT trying it.
Good luck either way!
A zillion charities would
A zillion charities would love to receive a gift from you when you pass. You can leave everything in a Living Trust which can be changed while you live, items such as cars and even real estate can be bought and sold by the trust (you're the trust's manager) and you can use those items at will. When you die the trust takes it and does as they please unless you've placed restrictions on them.
But you know all that don't you?
Well don't leave the kid a penny. Daddy can leave her whatever he's accumulated in his lifetime. All of this should be easy to arrange and even with your assets it should not cost more than a thousand or so to set up by a good trust attorney.
Personally I'd sell it all and move to Tahiti but maybe its not the money but the power/success you enjoy which is perfectly understandable. Anyway let your legacy live through a library building in your birth town, a home for battered women, the list is endless.
My Trust gives it all to my kid but it definitely insures that none passes to control to my wife who could leave it to her kids. As my mother said "You never know a person until you share a estate with them". A Trust locks it all away from the likes of her.
I'm mostly talking about my
I'm mostly talking about my awesomeness legacy. You know like leaving behind someone to do good in the sea of selfish and crazy!
Money- took are of all that stuff! I just don't want to have to be old and stuck hanging out with sd for holidays and being pissed. I love the library idea!
I've often considered that my
I've often considered that my image, although not consciously remembered, may reside in the memories of countless children I've meet over the years with the youngest ones giving me the longest "life" span.
Big plus is you'll never pay another library fine.
How about adopting?
How about adopting?
Im thinking if I can't bond
Im thinking if I can't bond with SD it's unlikely I'm the kind of person who could bond with an adopted baby. Maybe, but I can't imagine it would work for me.
SD isn't your child. An
SD isn't your child. An adopted child will be. The bond you have with your own child (bio or adopted) is nothing like the bond you experience with a step child.
My friend, a military
My friend, a military helicopter pilot, did IVF at age 40 and has fraternal twins with her husband (who had a V after his first marriage.) She waffled on it for a while but eventually did it and is very happy with the results. Give it a second thought. Good luck.
Thanks for the feedback
Thanks for the feedback everyone!